going to bring on my burning dreams, but that didn’t happen. I slept through the night and woke up at a quarter to six. Without my dreams I had no second sight, and the new day did not bring me any resolution to my problem.
I had witnessed how distraught Rose’s mother was, but in this world, tears don’t count.
My cell phone started ringing. The display said, “Caller unknown.” Whoever was calling me didn’t have caller ID.
I answered the phone, and a second later the caller clicked off. It could have been a wrong number, I knew, but I was betting that Rose’s mother had been on the other line.
I decided to take my own bet. If the mother came to me and didn’t force me to go to her, I would take that as my sign. If she gave herself up, she had to know she was looking at jail time. Her coming forward also meant that she was willing to accept the rest of the consequences. She would be a pariah, shunned by friends and family. The community would look upon her as a monster.
Most people would do anything to avoid that.
She had taken my card from Rose’s grave marker, though. And she had come to the grave. I had seen her suffering. The responsibility for her actions weighed heavily upon her. But would she call the cop? Would she confess her sins?
My cell phone was mute.
Fear usually trumps any and all motives. Everyone professes to want to do the right thing; doing it is another matter. It is the rare murderer that offers up a confession that hasn’t been coerced one way or another.
My cell phone rang again. “Detective Gideon,” I said.
No one said anything back, and just as I was convinced the caller had clicked off she said, “This is Inez Vargas. I’m calling about…”
She started crying, and the harder she tried to talk the more she failed. Her speech was high pitched and unintelligible if you didn’t know what was behind it. I knew what was behind it.
“I know what you’re calling about, Inez,” I said, “and we need to talk. Is there a place we can meet? How about a coffee shop near to where you live?”
It took her a few seconds to clear her throat and be able to speak. In a little voice she was finally able to say, “Do you know the Twelfth Street Coffee Shop?”
“I’ll be there in forty-five minutes,” I promised.
Inez was sitting at a table in the corner. She wasn’t looking up, and made no motion in my direction. An untouched cup of coffee sat on the table in front of her. Only when I sat down did she look up. Her face was pale and drawn, and dark circles dominated her features. She wasn’t wearing makeup and had on the same clothes she’d been wearing the night before.
“I’m Detective Gideon.”
She nodded but said nothing. My appearance didn’t frighten her or interest her. She was already in prison.
A server came along, and I ordered coffee and toast. When the server left, Inez’s eyes briefly met mine. “I think I should kill myself,” she said, “even though it’s a sin, but that will be just another sin, and maybe it will make up for what I did.”
“Don’t say anything else to me. Let me talk.”
Inez was on the heavy side but had a pretty face-or it would have been pretty had the murder of her daughter not weighed upon her. At that moment, she appeared as if she was nineteen going on ninety.
“There’s a story you need to hear.”
I had no right to be doing what I was doing, but I did it anyway. It was the only way Inez was ever going to have a normal life.
“I know you called to give me information about the newborn that was named Rose found at the Angel’s Flight landing.”
Tears filled her eyes and she nodded.
“Yesterday I got back the coroner’s report with the results from Rose’s autopsy. The coroner originally thought she died of suffocation, but as it turned out, Rose was born with a heart defect. I don’t know all the fancy medical terms, but the doctor said that Rose had a congenital condition that couldn’t have been treated. He told me that even had Rose been born in a hospital with all the best neonatal facilities, she would have died by morning.”
The permafrost that was Inez’s face began to thaw. Something resembling relief, or at least something short of complete despair, showed in her features.
“She would have died?”
“Nothing could have prevented that.”
“But she didn’t get the right vitamins, or the right care. If she had…”
“Even if she’d had the best prenatal care in the world, she would have died. That’s what the doctor told me.”
Her eyes took in mine. She made my glance a lifeline, and I had to support the burdens weighing so heavily on her. I didn’t blink.
“Yes?” she begged.
“Yes,” I said.
“She was so beautiful.”
My coffee and toast arrived, and the two of us stopped talking for a minute.
“Jail won’t be so bad now,” she said.
I surprised myself by saying, “I am not going to arrest you.”
Inez shook her head. That didn’t sound right, even to her. “I should be punished for what I did.”
“Normally you would be, but Rose’s heart condition changed things.”
Inez started to silently cry. I handed her some napkins. We didn’t talk for a few minutes while she tried to control her emotions. Our server came over to make sure everything was all right, and I nodded to thank her for her concern, and with my eyes tell her the situation was under control.
“I didn’t know I was pregnant until a few weeks ago,” she said. “I’ve always been heavy. When I realized what was happening to me, I kept thinking it wasn’t possible. You see, there was only the one time.”
I nodded, encouraging her to keep talking.
“I couldn’t tell my family. The shame would have killed them. And I didn’t know what to do, or who to talk to. I did a lot of praying. I kept hoping my problem would just somehow disappear.”
She reached for another napkin and wiped away some more tears.
“I didn’t know I could turn in the baby like the paper said you could. I thought if I gave the baby up, I’d have to answer all kinds of questions.”
For once, I hadn’t come to ask questions. I was there to listen and occasionally nod.
“I even thought about becoming a nun,” she said. “It made sense at the time.”
Inez dabbed her eyes. The tears weren’t falling as fast anymore. “When I left her there, I made sure she was warm. I thought it was a good spot for her to be found quickly. And I always liked the name of that spot: Angels Flight.”
A glimmer of a smile appeared on her face.
“Do I need to go with you?” she asked. “Will I have to talk to other people?”
I shook my head. “But I do need you to promise me something. You can never talk about this with anyone else.”
Her eyebrows furrowed. “Why?”
“Even though Rose died of natural causes, you abandoned her, and that’s against the law. I don’t want to have to arrest you, and the DA doesn’t want to have to prosecute you, because it’s a case we can’t win. It would be easier for us if you just said nothing. Do you think you can do that?”
Inez nodded.
The waitress came to the table with the check and asked if we needed anything else. I told her we didn’t, then handed her a Jackson and said no change was needed.
“So, what do I do now?” Inez asked.
When Father Pat had baptized me for the first time and hadn’t known if I would live, he’d offered to my ears
