He stood in the darkness staring at her window. Inside the room, the light went on as Julie came back from the bathroom. She wore a terrycloth robe and was carrying a towel, a washcloth, and a plastic soap box. Eddy watched her put the washcloth and soap box on her bureau and sit down on the bed. He stood there rigidly, watching her with eyes that did not blink. What was he doing here? he thought. If anybody caught him, he'd be arrested. He had to leave.
Julie stood. She undid the sash at her waist and the bathrobe supped to the floor. Eddy froze. He parted his lips, sucking at the damp air. She had the body of a woman — full-hipped with breasts that both jutted and hung. And with that pretty child's face —
Eddy felt hot breath forcing out between his lips. He muttered, '
Julie turned away to dress.
The idea was insane. He knew it, but he couldn't get away from it. No matter how he tried to think of something else, it kept returning.
He'd invite her to a drive-in movie, drug her Coke there, take her to the Hiway Motel. To guarantee his safety afterward, he'd take photographs of her and threaten to send them to her parents if she said anything.
The idea was insane. He knew it, but he couldn't fight it. He had to do it now — now when she was still a stranger to him; an unknown female with a child's face and a woman's body. That was what he wanted; not an individual.
No! It was insane! He cut his English class twice in succession. He drove home for the weekend. He saw a lot of movies. He read magazines and took long walks. He could beat this thing.
'Miss Eldridge?'
Julie stopped. As she turned to face him, the sun made ripples on her hair. She looked very pretty, Eddy thought.
'Can I walk with you?' he asked.
'All right,' she said.
They walked along the campus path.
'I was wondering,' said Eddy, 'if you'd like to go to the drive-in movie Friday night.' He was startled at the calmness of his voice.
'Oh,' said Julie. She glanced at him shyly. 'What's playing?' she asked.
He told her.
'That sounds very nice,' she said.
Eddy swallowed. 'Good,' he answered. 'What time shall I pick you up?'
He wondered later if it made her curious that he didn't ask her where she lived.
There was a light burning on the porch of the house she roomed in. Eddy pushed the bell and waited, watching two moths flutter around the light. After several moments, Julie opened the door. She looked almost beautiful, he thought. He'd never seen her dressed so well.
'Hello,' she said.
'Hi,' he answered. 'Ready to go?'
'I'll get my coat.' She went down the hall and into her room. In there, she'd stood naked that night, her body glowing in the light. Eddy pressed his teeth together. He'd be all right. She'd never tell anyone when she saw the photographs he was going to take.
Julie came back down the hallway and they went out to the car. Eddy opened the door for her.
'Thank you,' she murmured. As she sat down, Eddy caught a glimpse of stockinged knees before she pulled her skirt down. He slammed the door and walked around the car. His throat felt parched.
Ten minutes later, he nosed the car onto an empty ramp in the last row of the drive-in theatre and cut the engine. He reached outside and lifted the speaker off its pole and hooked it over the window. There was a cartoon playing.
'You want some popcorn and Coke?' he asked, feeling a sudden bolt of dread that she might say no.
'Yes. Thank you,' Julie said.
'I'll be right back.' Eddy pushed out of the car and started for the snack bar. His legs were shaking.
He waited in the milling crowd of students, seeing only his thoughts. Again and again, he shut the cabin door and locked it, pulled the shades down, turned on all the lights, switched on the wall heater. Again and again, he walked over to where Julie lay stupefied and helpless on the bed.
'Yours?' said the attendant.
Eddy started. 'Uh — two popcorns and a large and a small Coke,' he said.
He felt himself begin to shiver convulsively. He couldn't do it. He might go to jail the rest of his life. He paid the man mechanically and moved off with the cardboard tray. The photographs, you idiot, he thought. They're your protection. He felt angry desire shudder through his body. Nothing was going to stop him. On the way back to the car, he emptied the contents of the packet into the small Coke.
Julie was sitting quietly when he opened the door and slid back in. The feature had begun.
'Here's your Coke,' he said. He handed her the small cup with her box of popcorn.
'Thank you,' said Julie.
Eddy sat watching the picture. He felt his heart thud slowly like a beaten drum. He felt bugs of perspiration running down his back and sides. The popcorn was dry and tasteless. He kept drinking Coke to wet his throat. Soon now, he thought. He pressed his lips together and stared at the screen. He heard Julie eating popcorn, he heard her drinking Coke.
The thoughts were coming faster now: the door locked, the shades drawn, the room a bright-lit oven as they twisted on the bed together. Now they were doing things that Eddy almost never thought; that damned angel's face of hers. It made the mind seek out every black avenue it could find.
Eddy glanced over at Julie. He felt his hands retract so suddenly that he spilled Coke on his trousers. Her empty cup had fallen to the floor, the box of popcorn turned over on her lap. Her head was lying on the seat back and, for one hideous moment, Eddy thought she was dead.
Then she inhaled raspingly and turned her head toward him. He saw her tongue move, dark and sluggish on her lips.
Suddenly, he was deadly calm again. He picked the speaker off the window and hung it up outside. He threw out the cups and boxes. He started the engine and backed out into the aisle. He turned on his parking lights and drove out of the theatre.
Bracing himself, he went inside and rang the bell. He was very calm and the man didn't say a word to him. He had Eddy fill out the registration card and gave him the key.
Eddy pulled his car in to the breezeway beside the cabin. He put his camera in the room, then went out and looked around. There was no one in sight. He ran to the car and opened the door. He carried Julie to the cabin door, his shoes crunching quickly on the gravel. He carried her into the dark room and dropped her on the bed.
Then it was his dream coming true. The door was locked. He moved around the room on quivering legs, pulling down the shades. He turned on the wall heater. He found the light switch by the door and pushed it up. He turned on all the lamps and pulled their shades off. He dropped one of them and it rolled across the rug. He left it there. He went over to where Julie lay.
In falling to the bed, her skirt had pulled up to her thighs. He could see the tops of her stockings and the garter buttons fastened to them. Swallowing, Eddy sat down and drew her up into a sitting position. He took her sweater off. Shakily, he reached around her and unhooked her bra; her breasts slipped free. Quickly, he unzipped her skirt and pulled it down.
In seconds, she was naked. Eddy propped her against the pillows, posing her.
