‘It doesn’t pass unless it’s dealt with,’ he said. ‘He needed someone to talk to.’
‘We couldn’t take him to a doctor. If he got referred to a councillor or therapist, it would have come out what upset him so much.’
‘There’s such a thing as patient confidentiality. A reputable therapist wouldn’t pass on information like that.’
Nield shook his head. ‘We couldn’t take the risk.’
‘So you sacrificed your son’s psychological health,’ said Cooper. ‘And, ultimately, the life of your youngest daughter.’
‘It all started with good intentions. From a moment of weakness.’
‘Weakness? How could you do that to your daughter? Lauren would have been fifteen at the time.’
‘It was a mistake,’ said Nield.
‘A mistake?’
Cooper had heard enough.
‘Robert Nield, I’m arresting you. You do not have to say anything. But it may harm your defence if you do not mention when questioned something which you later rely on in court. Anything you do say may be given in evidence…’
Cooper put Robert Nield in the car, and asked Becky Hurst to stay at the house until help arrived. Mrs Nield needed a doctor, and Social Services would have to be involved with Alex.
‘I think I understand him, though,’ said Nield, as they drove back through Ashbourne.
‘Really?’
‘He’s very like me when I was his age. When I was about twelve, I had a Swiss Army knife I was very proud of. I used to play with it all the time, opening and closing the blades. One day, while I was watching TV, I slashed the leather sofa I was sitting on. It was just because the blade was in my hand, and that was what it was made for.’ Nield smiled sadly. ‘My father didn’t accept that explanation. I got a good smacking for it.’
‘I don’t see the connection,’ said Cooper.
‘Have you never done something for no particular reason? Just found that you’d destroyed an object without even thinking about it? Let me tell you, it’s as if your hands act on their own, while your mind is somewhere else entirely. There’s no question of intention — that doesn’t come into it. It’s a sort of…physical unreasoning.’
‘You make it sound as if it was nothing more than tearing up a sweet wrapper.’
‘There are impulses we can’t control.’
‘But this isn’t an object we’re talking about. It’s a person.’
‘The principle is the same.’
‘I don’t think so.’
‘It takes a bit of imagination to understand.’
Cooper shook his head. ‘We all have impulses. But we don’t always act on them. Maybe when they happen, it’s because our mind allows them to.’
‘Still, it’s a shame that Alex lied to us.’
‘He didn’t want to lie. He wanted to tell the truth. But there was no one who could be bothered to listen to him.’
‘I can’t really blame him for lying,’ said Nield, as if he hadn’t heard. ‘Teenagers lie to their parents all the time. It’s a miracle if they tell us the truth now and then. The only view we get of what’s going on in their heads is the impression we have from the outside, and what they tell us. The truth can be something completely different.’
Cooper knew that was probably true. But Alex was only putting into practice some of the things he’d learned from his father.
‘But he isn’t mad, you know.’
‘I said “disturbed”.’
‘You don’t have to be mad to do something horrible. Malice is natural to the human soul — just as natural as kindness. Being bad is part of being alive.’
Cooper didn’t want this conversation. He tried not answering, hoping it would shut Nield up. It didn’t work.
‘It’s true what I said, though,’ said Nield. ‘No one thinks of the consequences of that moment.’
‘Are you speaking about the conception of Lauren’s child now?’ asked Cooper. ‘Or the killing of your daughter Emily?’
The question Cooper asked himself now was, what would happen to Alex? The boy was thirteen years old. At one time, Alex Nield would have fallen into a legal grey area, where children aged between ten and fourteen were presumed not to know the difference between right and wrong. In those days, they could only be convicted if the prosecution proved they were aware what they were doing was seriously wrong. Under the age of ten, children weren’t considered to have reached an age where they could be held responsible for their crimes at all.
Now, though, the law had changed. At thirteen, Alex Nield was considered fully responsible for his actions, in the same way as any adult. He couldn’t vote until he was eighteen, and he couldn’t legally have sex until he was sixteen. But at the age of thirteen he was well within the age of criminal responsibility. The law would say that he knew perfectly well what he was doing.
Yes, Alex might be exactly like his father was at the same age. It was ironic, then, that if Robert Nield had committed a serious crime when he was thirteen, he might have escaped prosecution. But this was the twenty-first century. Alex would have no such luck.
Cooper recalled the four psychological types identified in that study of online gamers. Achievers, Explorers, and Socializers. And what was the name of the fourth group?
Oh yes, that was it. The Killers.
A call came in from Becky Hurst, still in Ashbourne.
‘Social Services have arrived,’ she said.
‘Good. Where is Alex? Still in his room, I suppose? He’ll be on his computer, oblivious to everything.’
‘No,’ said Hurst. ‘That’s the bad news. We can’t find him. Alex has disappeared.’
31
There were more officers at the Nield house now. Uniforms in the garden, checking along the back fence, talking to the neighbours. Two social workers were with Mrs Nield in the sitting room.
‘We’ve looked everywhere,’ said Hurst. ‘He’s gone. Disappeared without a word. He must have gone out of the back door when we arrived to talk to his parents.’
‘If not before that,’ said Cooper. ‘They wouldn’t have noticed that he’d gone.’
‘I’m sorry.’
‘It’s not your fault.’
Why did everyone keep wanting to take the blame? Cooper looked around desperately for clues.
‘Did he leave a note? A message? A text?’
‘Nothing,’ said Mrs Nield. ‘We’ve got to find him. He’s only thirteen, you know.’
‘Okay, so where would he go?’
‘I don’t know.’
‘We’ll have to get a full-scale search under way, Becky. He has quite a head start.’
‘I’ll see to it.’
No message, that was bad news. Cooper turned to the only person who Alex might have been in touch with. His older sister. At least he now had a phone number for her.
‘Lauren, has Alex contacted you?’
‘I got an email a little while ago.’
‘Of course you did. What did he say?’
‘It was really short. He just said “brb kk?’”
Cooper thought again of Alex’s online profile. That terse final line: brb kk?
