The Knife of Never Letting Go

And that’s not going to be fast enough.

I plunge straight down. Straight down thru the scrub.

“Come on!” I say out loud as my Noise forgets itself and all there is in the universe is my legs moving.

Come on!

I run.

Thru scrub–

And across road–

Thru more scrub–

Across road again as it doubles back–

Down and down–

Kicking up clods of earth and jumping over bushes–

Stumbling over roots–

Come on.

“Hang on,” I say to Viola. “You hang on, you hear me?”

Viola grunts every time we land hard–

But that means she’s still breathing.

Down–

And down–

Come on.

Please.

I skid on some bracken–

But I do not fall–

Road and scrub–

My legs aching at the steepness–

Scrub and road–

Down–

Please–

“Todd?”

“Hang on!”

I reach the bottom of the hill and I hit it running.

She’s so light in my arms.

So light.

I run to where the road rejoins the river, the road into Haven, trees springing up again all around us, the river rushing on.

“Hang on!” I say again, running down the road, fast as my feet will carry me.

Come on.

Please.

Round curves and corners–

Under trees and by the riverbank–

Up ahead I see the battlement I spotted with the binos from the hill above, huge wooden Xs piled up in a long row out to either side with an opening across the road.

“HELP!” I’m shouting as we come to it. “HELP US!”

I run.

Come on.

“I don’t think I can—” Viola says, her voice breathless.

“Yes you CAN!” I shout. “Don’t you DARE give up!”

I run.

The battlement’s coming–

But there’s no one.

There’s no one there.

I run thru the opening on the road and to the other side.

I stop long enough to take a turn round.

There’s no one.

“Todd?”

“We’re almost there,” I say.

“I’m losing it, Todd—”

And her head rolls back.

“No, yer NOT!” I shout at her face. “You WAKE UP, Viola Eade! You keep yer ruddy eyes open.”

And she tries. I see her try.

And her eyes open, only a little, but open.

And I run again as fast as I can.

And I’m shouting “HELP!” as I go.

“HELP!”

Please.

“HELP!”

And her breath is starting to gasp.

“HELP US!”

Please no.

And I’m not seeing NO ONE.

The houses I pass are shut up and empty. The road turns from dirt to paved and still no one out and about.

“HELP!”

My feet slam against the pavement–

The road is leading to the big church up ahead, a clearing of the trees, the steeple shining down onto a town square in front of it.

And no one’s there neither.

No.

“HELP!”

I race on to the square, crossing it, looking all around, listening out–

No.

No.

It’s empty.

Viola’s breathing heavy in my arms.

And Haven is empty.

I reach the middle of the square.

I don’t see nor hear a soul.

I spin around again.

“HELP!” I cry.

But there’s no one.

Haven is completely empty.

There ain’t no hope here at all.

Viola slips a little from my grasp and I have to kneel to catch her. My shirt has dropped from her wound and I use one hand to hold it in place.

There ain’t nothing left. The bag, the binos, my ma’s book, I’m realizing it’s all left up on the hillside.

Me and Viola are all we got, everything we have in the world.

And she’s bleeding so much–

“Todd?” she says, her voice low and slurring.

“Please,” I say, my eyes welling, my voice cracking. “Please.”

Please please please please please—