of.”
Crash waved absently, his attention riveted to the data on Baron’s laptop.
Raze had barely knocked on Kim’s door when it was yanked open and she threw herself into his arms.
“Is everything all right?” she asked, pressing her face into his chest.
With one arm around her waist, he lifted her feet from the floor and carried her into the apartment, closing them inside by leaning back against the door. “For now.”
What a lie, he thought. Everything was far from all right. No matter what he decided, it was going to be painful for both of them.
She searched his face for answers. “Talk to me.”
He dropped his bag on the ground and wrapped his arms around her, engulfing her in the strength and heat of his body. “I brought my crap to your door, Kim. And then I came back anyway.”
“Damn right you came back.” She had the same look of determination on her face that she’d had when she picked him up in the club. “I would’ve hunted you down if you hadn’t.”
“You wouldn’t find me.” And god, it killed him to think of her trying to. Because he understood the drive, the need and hunger to be near each other. It’s what brought him back to her even when he knew the best thing for both of them would be for him to walk away completely.
“Try me,” she challenged grimly. “If you want to go because you don’t feel anything for me, that’s fine. I won’t make it difficult for you. But as long as I think you’re taking the same ride I am, I’m not letting you get off easy.”
He pressed his cheek to hers, swamped with wanting her, with wanting
“Am I in danger?” she asked. “Is that what the roses were about? Is that what you’re kicking yourself over?”
“Not immediate.” Raze’s fingers shifted into her hair, pushing it back from her face. “But as long as I’m with you, it’s always going to be hovering in the background. You don’t need any more traumas, Kim. You’ve had more than your share already.”
“I come from a family of cops. I’ll be okay.” She cupped the back of his head, making sure his gaze stayed locked with hers. “It’s good you came back, Raze. Whatever else you may think, whatever else is going on, it’s important that you came back. It was the right thing to do.”
He hugged her again, running his hands up her spine to mold her into him. “I’ve got work to do today and I didn’t ask you first, but I gave up my room and brought my stuff here.”
“Good.”
“You say that now, but you don’t know what I am and I can’t tell you until I’m given permission to.”
“You tried warning me off the night I met you, remember? And it didn’t work, even when you were just a seriously prime piece of beefcake.” Kim squeezed him hard. “It’s not going to work now that I’m invested.”
“You don’t know what I do. You’ll need to know. I’ll need to tell you when I can, but I have to leave soon. No later than Tuesday. And I don’t know when I’ll be back. It could be weeks. Months.”
“Just so long as you come back. Promise me that. That’s where we’ll begin. We have the phone and internet. We can video conference. It won’t be the same as touching you, but at least we’re not giving up.”
His head fell back onto the sofa cushion, his eyes trained on the ceiling but not seeing it. “I’m going to be honest and tell you what’s running through my head. Dropping this now would be the best thing for both of us. We’ve had a couple days together. A week from now it won’t seem as intense. A few months down the road, it’ll be a fond memory. That’s the easy way to go.”
“You’re absolutely right.” She took a deep breath. “I was thinking the same thing while you were gone. I was rehearsing what I’d say to you, how to put across that I’d had a great time but the weekend was enough for me. There’s something here, we both know that, but it’s just a spark right now. With a little time and a little distance, it’ll burn out.”
He exhaled harshly. “Yeah.”
“But then I realized I’m not okay with that.” She was staring at him when he lifted his head to look at her. “Because I don’t know if I’ll find that spark again. I don’t if it would be the same if I did find it later. What if this is it? What if you’re the best thing that ever happened to me? Am I going to spend the rest of my life wondering what could have happened if I’d been strong enough to try? I don’t want to live with those questions haunting me.”
“I’m pretty sure I’m the worse thing that’s ever happened to you,” he muttered. “Let’s clear that up now.”
“And I’m pretty sure you could turn into a werewolf during full moons and I wouldn’t care.”
“What?”
“Or maybe a troll on Wednesdays? Maybe you’re a vampire, and that’s why I haven’t seen you eat.”
“Christ.” He couldn’t help it; his lips twitched with the urge to laugh. Which was just part of her magic. He was a different person with her. And he liked being that guy. Liked being
“Ha!” Kim’s eyes sparkled with mischief. “I spend most days examining bodily fluids, which a lot of people think is gross. We all have our blemishes. And we’re not talking about marriage here. We’re talking about taking a chance. Making a few phone calls. Sending a few emails.”
She nuzzled his nose with hers, a playful gesture that no one else would dare to make with him. His lungs seized with a terrible yearning. Tilting his head, he kissed her, drinking her in. Her lips were soft and sweet beneath his; her returning kiss was deep and slow. Savoring.
“What do ya say, rough guy?” she murmured against his mouth. “Wanna take a chance on me?”
“Yes.” Raze took her mouth again. “Yes. Fuck. But I have to go now. I have to work.”
“But you’ll be back.”
He fisted his hand in her hair and nodded. “I’ll be back.”
