What Came Before He Shot Her

been several steps ahead of her siblings. Glory turned from the girl and resolutely rang the bell. Daylight was fading, and while time was not exactly of the essence, considering Glory’s game plan, she was becoming anxious for the next part of their lives to begin. When there was no response, she rang a second time.

            “Looks like we won’t be saying any good-byes here, Gran,” was Ness’s acidulous comment. “Guess we best keep on going to the airport,  eh?”

            Glory ignored her. She said, “Le’s jus’ check round here,” and she led the children back towards the street and up a narrow path between the two lines of terraces. This path gave access to the backs of the houses and to their tiny gardens, which were laid out behind a tall brick wall. She said to Joel, “Hol’ your bruvver up, luv. Toby, see is ’ere lights on inside.” And then to any of them who might be interested,

            “Could be she up to it wiv one of her men. Dat Kendra’s got a onetrack mind.”

            Joel cooperated and squatted so that Toby could climb onto his shoulders. Toby did so obediently although the process was made difficult by the life ring. Once hoisted, Toby clung to the wall. He murmured, “She got a barbecue, Joel,” and stared at this object with undue fascination.

            “’S ’ere lights on?” Glory asked the little boy. “Toby, lookit de house, darlin’.”

            Toby shook his head, and Glory took this to mean no lights were shining from the lower floor of the house. There were no lights shining from the upper floors either, so she was faced with an unanticipated glitch in her plan. But Glory was nothing if not a woman who could improvise. She said, “Well . . .” as she rubbed her hands together, and she was about to go on when Ness spoke sharply.

            “Guess we’ll just have to go on to Jamaica, won’t we, Gran?” Ness had come no farther than the path itself, and she stood with her weight on one hip, her booted foot thrust out and her arms akimbo. This posture spread open the jacket she wore and put her bare midriff, her pierced navel, and her considerable cleavage on display. Seductive  came to Glory in a flutter, but she dismissed the thought as she often did, as she’d told herself she had  to do, in the past few years of her granddaughter’s constant company.

            “Guess we jus’ have to leave Aunt Ken a note.”

            Glory said, “You lot come wiv me,” and back around the building they went, to Kendra’s front door, where the suitcases, shopping trolley, and Sainsbury’s bags all made a jumble from the steps down to the narrow street. She told the children to sit on the slab that went for the porch, although anyone could see there was little enough space to do so. Joel and Toby cooperated, hunkering down among the carrier bags, but Ness stood back, and her expression said that she was just waiting for the inevitable excuses to come pouring out of her grandmother’s mouth. Glory said, “I make a place for you. An’ it take time when you make a place. So I go ahead and I send for you when t’ings are ready in Ja mai-ca.”

            Ness blew out a derisive breath. She looked around to see if there was someone nearby who might bear witness to her grandmother’s lies. She said, “We stayin with Aunt Kendra, then? She know that, Gran?

            She even round here? She on holiday? She move house? How you even know where she is?”

            Glory cast Ness a look but gave her attention to the boys, who were so much more likely to bend their behaviour to her plan. At fi fteen, Ness was too street wary. At eleven and seven, Joel and Toby still had a great deal ahead of them to learn.

            “Talked to your auntie yesterday,” she said. “She’s out at de shops. She’s laying on somet’ing special for your tea.”

            Another derisive breath from Ness. A solemn nod from Joel. A restless shifting from one buttock to the other from Toby. He plucked at Joel’s jeans. Joel put his arm around Toby’s shoulders. This sight warmed the one or two cockles that actually existed in Glory’s heart. They would all be fine, she told herself.

            She said, “I got to go, you lot. An’ what I want is you kids stopping here. You wait for Auntie. She be back. She fetching your tea. You wait for her here. Don’t go wanderin’ cos you don’t know dis place and I don’t want you lost. Y’unnerstan? Ness, you mind Joel. Joel, you mind Toby.”

            “I ain’t,” Ness began, but Joel said, “’Kay.” It was all he could say, so tight was his throat. His life had so far taught him that there were some things it was pointless to fight, but he hadn’t yet mastered not feeling about them.

            Glory kissed the top of his head, saying, “You a good lad, luv,” and she patted Toby diffidently. She picked up her suitcase and two of the carrier bags, and she backed away, drawing in a deep breath. She didn’t actually like leaving them on their own like this, but she knew that Kendra would be home soon. Glory hadn’t phoned her in advance, but aside from her little problem with men, Kendra lived by the book, responsibility incarnate. She had a job, and she was training for another, to get back on her feet after her last disastrous marriage. She was heading towards a real career.  No way in hell was Kendra off anywhere unexpected. She’d be back soon. It was, after all, a bit past teatime.

            “You lot don’t move an inch,” Glory told the grandkids. “You give your auntie a big kiss from me.”

            That said, she turned to leave them. Ness stood in her way. Glory tried to give her a tender smile. “I send for you, darlin,” she said to the girl. “You don’ b’lieve me. I c’n tell. But it’s God’s truth, Ness. I send for you. Me an’ George, we make a house for you lot to come to, an’ when it’s all ready for you—”

            Ness turned. She began to walk off, not in the direction of Elkstone Road, which would have been the same route as Glory’s, but in the direction of the path between the buildings, the path to Meanwhile Gardens and what lay beyond them. Glory watched her go. Stalking, she was, and her high-heeled boots made a sound like whip cracks in the cold air. And just like whip cracks, the sound struck Glory’s cheeks. She wasn’t meaning  to do wrong to the children. The way things were at the moment was simply the way they had to be.

            She called after Ness, “You got any message I give to our George? He setting up a house for you, Nessa.”

            Ness’s steps quickened. She stumbled on a bit of raised pavement, but she did not fall. In a moment, she’d vanished round the side of the building, and Glory listened in vain for some kind of words to float back to her on the late afternoon. She wanted something to reassure her, something to tell her that she had not failed. She called out, “Nessa? Vanessa Campbell?”

            In return there came only an anguished cry. It was cousin to a sob, and Glory felt it like a blow to her chest. She looked to her grandsons for what their sister had been unwilling to give her.

            “I send for you,” she said. “Me an’ George, when we got de house in order, we tell Aunt Ken to make de ’rangements. Ja-mai-ca.” She intoned the word, “Ja- mai-ca.”

            Toby’s response was to scoot even closer to Joel. Joel’s was to nod.

            “You b’lieve me, den?” his grandmother asked.

            Joel nodded. He couldn’t see any other choice.

            THE TALL OVERHEAD lights came on along the path as Ness circled around a low brick building on the edge of Meanwhile Gardens. This was a child drop-in centre—devoid of children at this time of day—and when Ness glanced at it, she saw a lone Asian woman within, who looked to be closing up for the evening. Beyond this place, the gardens fanned out, and a serpentine path wove through tree-studded hillocks, tracing the way to a staircase. This climbed in a metal spiral to an ironrailed bridge, and the bridge itself spanned the Paddington branch of what was the Grand Union Canal. The canal served as the northern boundary of Meanwhile Gardens, a division between Edenham Estate and a collection of housing where sleek, modern flats sat cheek by jowl with antique tenements in a declaration of the fact that life overlooking the water had not always been so desirable.

            Ness took in some of this, but not all. She homed in on the steps, the iron-railed bridge above them, and where the road crossing that bridge might lead.

            Inside, she burned, so much so that the very heat of her made her want to fling her jacket to the ground and then stamp upon it. But she was acutely aware of the January cold beyond the heat inside her, touching her flesh where her flesh was bare. And she felt caught inextricably between both of them: the heat within and the cold without.

She reached the steps, unmindful of the eyes that watched her from beneath one of the adolescent oak trees that grew from the hillocks in Meanwhile Gardens, unmindful also of the eyes that watched her from beneath the bridge over the Grand Union Canal. She didn’t yet know that as darkness fell—and sometimes even when it was far from falling—transactions were made in Meanwhile Gardens. Cash was passed from one hand to another, it was