understood.
“About what happened-” Adam began.
She placed her gloved fingers over his lips. “No,” she whispered. “Not a word.”
If he said he was sorry, it would be worse than a bullet to her heart. If he begged her to stay, they’d both regret it. He belonged here, not with her. She might not know much, but she knew he had turned to her in grief and she’d be a fool if she tried to make it more.
Gripping the saddle horn, she pulled herself up. His hand slid from her waist to her boot, but he didn’t try to stop her.
“Until we meet again.” He offered his hand.
“We’ll never meet again,” she answered, knowing she had to cut the wound clean if it would ever heal. “You’ll be married soon with your life full helping Daniel raise the twins, and I’ll be a world away.”
“Let’s ride.” Wolf kicked his horse.
Nichole covered Adam’s hand as it rested on her leg. “I’ll never forget you.” She smiled and nudged her mount, already dancing to follow.
She was out of hearing distance before Adam answered, “Nor I you.”
EIGHT
ADAM WATCHED NICHOLE and her brother ride away with the feel of her next to him still thick in his mind. Had he really kissed her so completely? He told himself he was an honorable man who was engaged to be married to another, but at this moment, he didn’t feel very honorable or very engaged. All he knew was that if they’d had more time, he would have made love to her with a passion he’d never felt toward another or even dreamed he might feel. The logic that had always ruled his mind had somehow been sidestepped this morning.
Wes broke the silence. “Want some coffee before I ride into town with you?”
Adam looked at his brother and raised an eyebrow. “How’d you know I was going to town this morning?”
Moving toward the kitchen, Wes winked. “After the way you looked at Nick, I figure you’ll be having a few words with Bergette.”
“I plan to, but not because of Nichole. Bergette and I have grown apart these past years. The woman I spent the war planning a future for wasn’t waiting for me as I thought. I think I knew it within minutes after I saw her, but I didn’t want to admit it to myself. It’s obvious we could never marry, and the time to tell her is now. She needs a groom for her wedding, not a husband in her life.”
Wes opened the screen door. “Then you’ll find Nichole?” he asked.
“No.” Adam took a deep breath. “We’ll never see one another again. We’ve said our good-byes.” Neither of them had spoken of a future. They both knew it would be impossible. All he wanted was to be a doctor and adventure still ran thick in her blood.
Wes looked like he didn’t believe Adam’s words, but he didn’t question him. Adam considered himself a man who set his life by order and logic. Nichole and he were simply two people who met once and touched one another’s lives… he would be a fool to think it was more.
An hour later, Adam was wishing he’d let Wolf shoot him at dawn. At least then he would have silence. Bergette’s screams were starting to make his eyes cross.
To say the princess had taken the news of their broken engagement dramatically was an understatement. She’d cried, pouted, and finally attacked with a vengeance. When she ordered Charles to throw him out, Adam almost ran from the room. When he glanced back, he wondered how he could have thought her so beautiful.
Adam didn’t take a deep breath until he rode within sight of the farmhouse. The loss of the woman he’d thought Bergette was weighed on his heart. The woman he remembered had somehow died while he’d been away, and the replacement was a shallow second to the Bergette he’d kept in his dreams for years. He felt he’d lost someone dearly loved, not to death, but to change.
As he unsaddled his mount, Adam realized he didn’t want to stay here and face the rumors she’d start. In one of her ravings, she’d sworn that no person in town would ever seek his medical advice when they learned of how cruelly he’d broken her heart. He wasn’t sure he could bear to live here and see the shell of a woman he’d held so dearly in his dreams.
Adam moved toward the house. The sun was setting and he realized he hadn’t eaten today. This day had passed in emotions not in hours, leaving him spent and weary.
“’Evening.” Wes fell into step. “You still engaged, little brother?”
“Is the offer to travel to Texas still on?”
“I guess that answers my question.” Wes sighed. “But you’ll have to get in line. Danny boy told me a few minutes ago that he’s going also.”
“He found someone to take care of the twins for a while?”
Wes laughed. “Of course, little brother. He found Willow to be wet nurse and two fools named McLain to act as nursemaids. We’re all going to Texas.”
Three months later, just outside a little settlement known as Fort Worth, Adam looked at his older brother and wondered how they’d made it. He’d thought the war had been hard on them. Fighting the rebs was nothing compared to hauling newborns a thousand miles by train, boat, and wagon.
He’d spent many a night in the saddle with one of the tiny girls sleeping in the fold of his arm. Though Willow had done her best, the brothers all learned to do what was necessary. Daniel loved the caretaking, forgetting his grief only when the babies needed him. Adam also enjoyed the role, finding it fascinating to watch them grow. But Wes grumbled every mile. He’d announced more than once that he’d rather roll through a corral of manure than have another drop of baby spit-up soak through to his shoulder.
Finally, they left Daniel and the girls at a settlement called Parker’s Fort near Dallas. Wes lectured Daniel on caring for the twins, though there were several mothers in the small village willing to offer advice.
Adam had heard Daniel talk of the colony named after John Parker and dedicated to religion and Bible study. The folks might look meek, but their settlement had survived thirty years of hardship. With the agreement that Daniel would act as blacksmith, they provided him with a small house and supplies to last through the winter. The community seemed exactly what a young father with twin babies needed: an extended family.
This might be the very place Daniel could find peace, Adam thought. The girl, Willow, smiled more the farther they got from her home. They were a week out before she stopped asking if they were going to send her back to her pa.
The McLains had boarded up the farmhouse on the first of August along with all the memories and left for Texas. Deep within Adam he knew they would never be back. From this point on, like for many of the men from the North and South, Texas would be called home. For Wes and Daniel, it seemed a calling, but Adam was only drifting, more leaving one place than going somewhere else.
Now to the best of his calculation it was the first of November. Adam crossed his leg over the saddle horn and leaned back, looking at the dusty little huddle of shacks that had once been a fort. “What do you think of Fort Worth?”
Wes lit a thin cigar and took his time answering. “I heard this place was never more than a single company post.” He stood on his stirrups. The leather he wore creaked with his movements. “Lucky thing Texas wasn’t used much as a battlefield during the war. I’d hate to think of this state looking any sorrier. They should let the Indians have it.”
“I heard back at the stage station a band of fifteen warriors attacked two men not far from here a month ago. Maybe the Indians will have it yet. They killed one man named Wright. The other, Smith, made it back to a settlement north of here called Denton before he died.”
“Great, another thing to keep a lookout for. I might as well give up sleep while I’m here making my fortune and trying to keep my hair.”
Adam laughed. “It’s not all that bad as long as we’re moving fast and well armed. The Butterfield Stage makes it well past Fort Worth without being raided often. If the stage is running regular, how bad could the state be?”
