The Golden Gizmo

You will be here because you are not sure. Is it not so?'

Toddy had looked blank for a moment. Then his eyes narrowed and he grinned. 'You've got my number mister,' he said. 'I'll be here. And if there's fifty dollars to be made I'll make it.'

They had gone out, then, taking Mitt's ten dollars with them; and when Milt looked around for the brandy bottle, he found it gone, too.

5

Airedale Aahrens had once broken a man's jaw for asking why he'd been given the handle. It was like asking a one-armed man why he is called Wingie. Airedale had a long thick neck on a short stocky body. His hair was a crisp brownish-yellow, and his eyes were large and liquid and brown.

He didn't speak when Toddy entered the bail bond office. He simply picked up a pencil and the telephone and dialed the police station. After a moment he grunted, 'Airedale. What's the score on Mrs. Elaine Kent?'

Toddy drew a chair up to the bondsman's desk and sat down. Elbows on his knees, he studied the familiar abbreviations which Airedale scrawled on a scratchpad:

'DD.'

'Drunk and disorderly.'

'Asshole…'

'Assaulting an officer.'

'Rear.'

'Resisting arrest.'

It was quite a list, even for Elaine. She had obviously been in unusually good form today.

Airedale stopped writing for a moment. Then he wrote 'four-bits' and cocked an eye at Toddy. Toddy sighed, made a loop with his thumb and forefinger. Airedale said, 'Oke,' and slammed up the receiver.

Toddy counted fifty dollars onto the desk, and the bondsman recounted them with thick stubby fingers. He made a balling movement with his hand and the money vanished. He discovered it tucked beneath Toddy's chin, shook his head with enigmatic disapproval, and dropped the bills into a drawer.

Toddy grinned tiredly. He didn't ask why the bond was not put up. He knew it was up. Airedale was in the real estate business. He sold lots. He bought them, too-cheap ones that were plenty adequate for dumps. He'd hold on to them until he needed them, and in the meantime a few hundred bucks slipped to his cousin in the city hall would miraculously produce an official assessment of the land at several times the purchase price-and the value.

Every once in a while somebody would wonder what had happened to all the forfeited bail. Where was the cash? What did the city have to show for it? The cash was in Airedale's pocket, but he'd give the city something to show for it, all right. He was no crook. He'd let the city have a nice thousand-dollar lot for ten or twelve grand in forfeited bail.

Airedale said, 'How come they're going after Elaine? They trying to roust you, kid?'

Toddy shrugged. 'You know how Elaine is.'

'I do,' Airedale nodded. 'I thought maybe you didn't. You workin' full time as her chump, or can I rent you out? Let me be your agent, kid. They's millions in it.'

Toddy chuckled wryly. Characters, he thought. Ten thousand characters and no people. 'Maybe we'd better talk about something else,' he suggested.

'Maybe we had,' Airedale agreed promptly. 'What do you hear from Shake's boys these days? Still trying to chisel in on you?'

'Still trying,' Toddy said.

'You don't think they mean business, huh?'

'Probably,' Toddy shrugged. 'Where they slip up is in not thinking that we mean business, too; guys like me. Anyone tough enough to make it in the gold-buying game is plenty tough enough to hold on to what he makes. I'm not going to let a bunch of punks like Shake's tap me for protection. If I scared that easy, I wouldn't be in the racket.'

'So? How come Shake's so stupid?'

'He had a little luck. He tapped a few Sunday buyers- old-age pensioners, kids, college boys, people like that.'

Airedale nodded appreciatively. He looked toward the door. 'Here she comes,' he said. 'God's little gift to Los Angeles-or why people move to Frisco.'

Elaine didn't look bad, for Elaine. She always looked mussed and sloppy and she looked no more than that now. Though she was grinning, a delightful, elfin, heartwarming grin, it was immediately apparent that she had heard Airedale's remark. She made an obscene gesture with her forefinger.

'You can kiss my ass, you fat-mouthed, nosey son-of-a-bitch!'

'You mean that one under your nose? Not me, honey. I'm strictly an under-the-skirts guy-the clean stuff, y'know.'

'Why, you dirty bas-'

'Knock it off.' Toddy grabbed her by the elbow and dragged her toward the door. 'That wasn't very funny, Airedale.'

'So who's joking?' said Airedale. He broke into a roar of laughter as they went out, the legs of his chair banging against the floor with the rocking of his body. He stopped at last: wiped his eyes on the sleeve of his checkered shirt. He looked thoughtfully into his cash drawer, then firmly pushed it shut.

Meanwhile, riding toward the hotel in a taxi, Toddy was barely aware of the profane and obscene words which streamed softly, steadily from Elaine's mouth. It wasn't that he was used to such talk; somehow he had never got used to it. In the always-new fascination of watching her face, he simply lost track of what she was saying.

She had perfect control of her expressions. In the space of seconds she could register sorrow, elation, bewilderment, terror, surprise- one after the other. And unless you knew her, and sometimes even when you did, you could not doubt that the pantomimed emotions were anything but genuine.

Her expression now was one of angelic resignation, gentle entreaty. And her words were, 'How about it, you stingy bastard? I want a bottle and, by God, I'm gonna get one!'

Toddy shook his head absently, not really hearing her. Her leg slid under his, and the heel of her tiny pump swung back against his crotch. He swore and jerked away. Involuntarily, he swung out and the back of his hand struck her in the face.

It wasn't a hard blow, but it was a noisy one. The cab stopped with a jerk. The driver pushed his hard face over the glass partition.

'What you tryin' to pull, there, Mac?'

'She-' Toddy repressed a groan-'Mind your own business!'

'Like that, huh?' The driver reached for the door. 'Maybe I'll make this my business.'

'Wait,' said Elaine. 'Wait, please! It's this way, driver. My husband just got out of jail and his nerves are all on edge-' She let her hands flutter descriptively. 'He wanted something to drink, and I didn't want him to have anything. But I guess… well, maybe he does need it.'

'Dammit,' snapped Toddy. 'I don't want any-'

'Now you know you do, honey.' Elaine laid a sympathetic hand on his arm. 'He really must, driver.