Precious Consequences

Hayley just rolls her eyes and leans against the counter. I sense she’s trying to create some distance, but it won’t work for long. I’m too determined to get her to finally talk to me.

“So, Cam, to what do we owe the visit?” Hannah asks. She’s sneaky. She knows why I’m here.

I clear my throat. “I’m, uh, actually here to talk to Hayley.”

No one looks surprised. In fact, both Hannah and Hayley’s grandmother have shit eating grins on their faces. They exchange a look, which Hayley also notices, and then look between the two of us.

“Oh, uh, I just remembered that we need some things from the store,” Hayley’s grandmother says. “Ari, sweetheart, are you going to come with me to the store?”

Ari nods, and jumps off my lap, following Hayley’s grandmother out of the kitchen

“And I forgot, I have to go home and help my mother with something,” Hannah adds. She hugs both me and Hayley goodbye before grabbing her things.

Just like that, Hayley and I are left alone, without a single clue how it happened.

“That was weird,” I chuckle.

“And not the slightest bit obvious,” Hayley replies sarcastically.

An uncomfortable silence settles over us, and my hands start to sweat. Why am I so fucking nervous now?

“Cameron - ”

“Hayley - ”

We start speaking at the same time and stop, waiting for each other to continue.

“You first,” Hayley tells me. She crosses her arms over her chest again and doesn’t move from her spot against the counter.

I swallow, wondering how I’m going to approach this without making it worse. I open my mouth to speak, but Hayley is quick to interrupt me.

“Wait, let me go change quickly.”

Before I can respond she’s out the kitchen and her feet pad up the stairs. I get the feeling she’s stalling, or running away from me. Or both. When fifteen minutes pass, I decide to go to her instead. As I enter her bedroom, she walks out of the bathroom, wrapped in a towel. “You showered?”

“Yes, I’m allowed to do that.”

I try not to look her up and down, but, hell, she makes it so damn difficult not to.

“You’re stalling,” I tell her.

Looking away from me, she replies, “No, I’m not. If I want to take a shower, then I will take a shower!”

I walk closer to her, noticing how she freezes on the spot and how her chest starts to rise and fall unevenly.

“You have got to be one of the most frustrating women ever,” I tell her. “But you can’t hide from me, buttercup.”

Her arms fall to her side and she huffs, frustration settling on her face. “You know what? I don’t need this shit right now. I’ve had a really crappy morning - ”

The way her lips move distracts me, the way they’ve swelled because she’s been nibbling on it makes my decision so much easier. Oh fuck it. I grab her nape and yank her into me, crashing my lips to hers. They’re warm, and a little wet, and at first, resistant. But then I feel Hayley’s surrender when her shoulders relax and her body presses harder into mine, seeking me out, touching me, fanning the fire burning in my soul, in my body and my heart.

I break away, my pulse racing, and her eyes flutter open. “Will you just listen? Please?”

Her voice comes as nothing more than a breathless whisper. “Okay.”

My nerves from a few minutes ago resurface, and I don’t understand why I’m so anxious. Be a man, Cam. Dammit, just do it. Tell her you love her. Fuck everything else. She’s all you want, all you need.

“I fucked up,” I tell her softly. “And you will never know how sorry I am for what I said to you the day my dad died. I shouldn’t have asked you to leave.”

Hayley searches my face, her eyes lingering on every feature as if she’s trying to figure out whether or not I’m being truthful. Finally she sighs, finding whatever it is she was searching for.

“I understand,” she replies softly. “I know why you did it. But you really hurt me. I told you I love you and - ”

“I kicked you out,” I finish for her. Thinking back to how I acted is like a kick to the stomach. I release a heavy breath and prepare to grovel if that’s what it will take to get Hayley back.

“I have no excuse for what I said or how I behaved, but I didn’t mean any of it. I was a wreck, and so angry with myself that I wanted to protect you from that, and the only way I could think of doing that was to push you away. I see now why that was the worst thing I could’ve done.”

“I would’ve given you space, if you had just asked me. I wanted to be there for you,” Hayley retorts in a low voice.

I cup her face. “What must I do to show you how sorry I am? Because I’ll do it, Hayls. I’ll do anything.”

“Don’t push me away again,” she whispers. “I was miserable without you.”

“I won’t,” I promise, pressing our foreheads together. “And you have to know that nothing happened between me and Rachel, right? You know that, don’t you?”

“I do now, but for a while she had me convinced otherwise.”

“She told me what she said to you, at dad’s memorial service.”

Hayley’s expression is one of skepticism, and disbelief. “She did?”

I nod. “After you left the diner last night I cornered her and she told me everything.”

Hayley shakes her head and shrugs. “Talk about one big ass misunderstanding.”

“Why didn’t you just tell me?”

“Because I was afraid, okay? I didn’t want you finding out about my past with Kyle, and how Ari came into my life.” Hayley looks away and fiddles with her fingers. “Not that it matters now. You know everything. I have nothing left to hide.”

“I was upset, but not for the reason you think, Hayls. I was mad that instead of talking to me, you avoided me. ”

She looks at me, worry lines marring her forehead. “So you weren’t upset that I never told you about the video?”

I was surprised, but how could I hold something like that against her when I wasn't part of her life back then? It doesn’t matter to me what mistakes Hayley has made in her past, or who she used to be. All I care about is who she is now, and who she will be with me.

“No. I knew you were hiding something, but I figured you’d want to tell me when you were ready. I can’t judge you, or be angry with you, because of who you were. I only want who you’ve become.”

Her eyes glaze over and as she blinks, tears spill over the rims of her eyelids. I brush them away with my thumb, reveling the feel of touching her soft skin again after not being able to for what feels like forever. These last few weeks without Hayley have been torture. I tentatively wrap my arms around her, and hug her close.

“I’m so sorry, Cam,” she murmurs into my chest. “I made a mess of things by not being honest with you. I thought I was doing what was best for Ari. I would rather die than have her suffer for my mistakes.”

I kiss her head and rub my hand up and down her back. Her heart is beating against my chest and I squeeze her tighter, like she could possibly melt into me. “I know, but you can’t forget about what’s best for you either. Ari will be just fine, because she has you for a mom.”

Hayley sniffles and looks up at me, a small smile gracing her features. “I’ve missed you,” she whispers quietly. “And I’m sorry for everything.”

Our lips brush and that connection crackles to life between us, igniting an even stronger need to have Hayley in my life.

“I’ve missed you, too,” I breathe against her lips. “And I missed Ari, too.”

Hayley smiles, and this time there's nothing small about it. “She missed you, too,” she tells me. “She asked about you almost every day that we were apart.”

That makes me sad. I hate knowing that all of this bullshit has affected Ari negatively.