My legs felt unsteady as I walked down the feminine products aisle. I want to be pregnant more than anything in the world right now. I thought I had made peace with being childless, but it always hurt deep down. Every new person I met would ask me if I had children, and my answer was always the same… no, life had other plans for me. Every time I gave that answer my heart felt like a tiny needle pierced it, and it had been turned into a pin cushion over the years.
I paid for the one that claimed to be the most accurate and easy to read. “Is there a bathroom here?” I asked the cashier. I couldn’t wait to get back to work to find out. I walked to the back of the store with the test in my purse, holding it tightly against my body as if it were precious cargo. I tore open the box as soon as I walked through the door and discarded the box minus the stick. I followed the directions and placed the cap back on, putting it in my purse for safe keeping.
I walked to my car feeling like I was awaiting a death sentence, not from pregnant, but the possibility that age had robbed me of a child for eternity. I sat in my car trying to stare at the stick. I placed it on the passenger seat and texted Kayden.
I couldn’t tell him. I didn’t want him to get excited or start planning in his mind if the test was negative. Kayden wanted a family and always felt it was a possibility.
I wanted to tell him, wanted him to comfort me, but I thought it would be unfair to him. This was something so very personal for me… men could have children for their entire life, but at some point a woman loses that ability forever.
I held my breath as I reached over and gripped the pregnancy stick in my hand, scared to see the result. I slowly opened my fingers one at a time, dragging out my torture and any chance of bad news. My eyes grew wide as the blue plus sign filled the test strip window. My heart stopped as the realization of what I was staring at hit me. I’m pregnant, we’re pregnant. Large teardrops streamed down my cheeks plopping on my dress pants. A sob ripped through me and I allowed the sound to fill the interior of my car. I didn’t know until this moment how much I wanted a child, this child.
Kayden walked through the door shortly after five. I cleaned the entire apartment waiting for him to arrive. I couldn’t sit still and wanted to tell him, but wanted it to be in person. “Hey baby.” I said walking towards him as he kicked off his shoes.
“Hi love.” He kissed me on the lips and wrapped his arms around me. “Are you okay love, you’re sweating?”
“I’m fine, I’ve just been cleaning,” I said. “Come sit down for a minute.”
“What’s wrong? Is something wrong with you?” he asked as he sat down and I face him on the couch. I grabbed his hand, squeezing it before I spoke. “You’re scaring me, Sophia.”
“Oh sweetheart, don’t be scared,” I said. “I’m pregnant.” A grin crept across my face as I watched him for a reaction.
His beautiful eyes grew wide and his lips parted, his teeth shining from the smile. “Really?” he asked. I shook my head yes and his eyes glisten from newly formed tears. “Oh my God, I can’t believe it.” He reached out and placed his hand on my belly. “We’re going to have a baby.”
“I still need to make a doctor’s appointment, but I’m late and the pregnancy test I took today said I am.” I placed my hand upon his and leaned forward kissing his lips.
Kayden wrapped me in his arms smothering me with the kiss. His lips broke from mine as he held my face between his hands. “A baby, you’re giving me a baby. You’ve made me the happiest man in the world. I love you, Sophia.”
“I love you too, Kayden, you’ve given me the greatest gift in the world,” I said staring into his eyes. Kayden still had the ability to steal my breath like he did the first time he kissed me. Navy blue had been wiped out and replaced by a rainbow of colors. Kayden had filled my world with the color that I’d lacked and now a piece of us would be entwined forever in the form of a child.
Chelle Bliss has dedicated her life to education. She has been a teacher for over ten years and holds a Master of Education degree. Teaching has given her a creative outlet, but she yearned for something more. Writing has given her that, no longer about just creativity, it became a journey.
She’s an avid reader; consuming contemporary romance, dark reads, young adult, and all things erotica. Chelle wanted to create a book filled with characters that readers could relate to with real world problems and matching wallets.
She loves to travel and her favorite cities are New Orleans and Paris. She currently lives in Florida with her amazing boyfriend and two kittens, Nola and Peanut.
Her debut book
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