EVEN VAMPIRES GET THE BLUES

version of Caspar going down under a swarm of Scottish ghosts.

Pilar grabbed me by the throat and hauled me upward, until I was dangling a good six feet off the ground. 'You dare intervene in a sacred duty?'

'It's my statue,' I croaked, unable to breathe with the hold he had on my neck. 'I found it first.'

Sam! Paen shouted, evidently having just seen my predicament. I knew without looking he was hacking and slashing his way through the demons that were trying to free their master.

'It must be destroyed,' Pilar told me, unmindful that I was turning blue. 'It contains the source of his powers. Without it, he will be confined to hell, where he belongs.'

'Can't… breathe…' I gasped.

'It was given to you by mistake,' Pilar continued, just as if I wasn't slowly asphyxiating in front of him. 'It was taken by Paymon, a rival demon lord, several hundred years ago. I knew Paymon would not allow Yan Luowang to have it, so I was content to wait. But Yan Luowang is clever. He has gathered power over the centuries, waiting for the moment when he could steal the statue back. I bartered for it from Paymon before he could do so.'

'I… can't… breathe…' My lungs ached to draw in a breath, but Pilar's grip on my neck prohibited any air from passing.

'Here come the Marines,' one of the Americans called out as behind him, film extras ran to join the battle, yelling enthusiastically as they had been coached to do. I wanted to shout at them, to warn them that they could be killed, but there was no way I could do anything but dangle helplessly in front of Pilar. I clawed at his hand with my one arm, but he didn't seem to have any trouble at all holding me up for an extended period of time.

'As the servant of Yan Luowang, I was able to monitor his quest for the statue. It would be just a matter of time before the Dark One he charged with finding it would come to you, so I attempted to remove you from the scene by giving you another task, but you, foolish one, would not leave.'

The screams of several men tore through the night as a veritable volcano of Scottish ghosts erupted off of Caspar, their bodies cartwheeling as they were flung high before plummeting back to the ground.

'Now, that is some quality battle choreography,' one of the Americans commented. 'No wires, yet. Impressive.'

'You… Owen… Race?' Red spots started appearing before my eyes. My legs kicked madly as I tried to break the hold Pilar had on me.

'Instead, you intercepted the minion Paymon had sent to bring me the statue, completely mucking up my carefully laid plans. Yes, I am Owen Race. I am also known as Samaria Magnus.' Pilar stopped for a moment to narrow his eyes at me. 'You are not a very good investigator. You should find some other form of employment.'

'Sun Wukong, I will be—' Caspar went down again as a herd of movie extras flung themselves on him.

'Tried to… kill us?'

Pilar gave me another of his disappointed looks. 'You do not know what will happen if Yan Luowang were to regain power. He would not be content to rule in Abaddon—he would lay claim to the mortal world as well. I would do anything to stop him, even if it meant killing innocents.'

The red spots merged into puddles and formed interesting shapes as they danced before me. 'Why… tell me?'

Between them, Pilar looked moderately surprised at my question. 'It is traditional, I believe, for the villain to explain all his plans just before he kills off the pesky heroine.'

'Not… pesky… determined …' I gave up fighting him, and hung limp from his grip, the burn in my lungs so great I just wanted the red blobby things to ease my suffering.

'You're not watching enough movies, demon. The audience always wants to see the hero win,' a deep, masculine, angry Scottish voice said behind him.

'Dude, catch the guy on the rock with the bodacious sword!' a voice called out over the roar of the battle.

'Can't, filming the D and D guy. Look at him go! He's picking them off like they were fleas.'

'Paen, no!' I managed to choke out, blinking madly to clear my vision. Paen had managed to get on the rock behind Pilar, and was in the middle of a downswing that, judging by the size of the sword he carried, likely would divide the monkey god.

Pilar swung around, his arm raised to block Paen's attack.

It was too late for Paen to stop the downswing, but he didn't even ask why I wanted mercy for the man who was currently choking the life out of me—he threw his body weight to the side so the sword struck Pilar at a different, less deadly angle.

'What is it about you and arms?' I asked, gasping in great lungsful of air as the stranglehold Pilar held on my throat was released by dint of Paen lopping off his arm. I rubbed my throat, wondering if I'd ever be able to swallow again.

Paen and Pilar stared at the gruesome member lying at their feet.

'Er…' Paen said, then looked at me. 'Why didn't you want me to kill him?'

'You took my arm off!' Pilar said, his face filled with amazement.

'Because he's a good guy,' I answered Paen hoarsely, wincing at the sound of my voice. Paen's eyes narrowed on my throat.

'Good guys don't try to throttle innocent women,' he said, swinging the sword back up so the tip pointed at Pilar's jugular.

'You cut it right off. My arm, you cut my arm off.' His nostrils flared as he raised his head to glare at Paen. 'Do you have any idea how long I've had this human form? Six hundred and twenty-seven years. I liked it! And now you've had my arm off.'

'You were strangling my Beloved,' Paen said, his eyes flashing quicksilver.

'She was trying to stop me from destroying Yan Luowang,' Pilar replied, raising the statue over his head.

Caspar roared out something I didn't understand, charging straight at us, extras falling off him like confetti.

'Please, please don't destroy it,' I begged. 'We need it to fulfill a debt. Couldn't we have it just long enough to do that, and then you can use it to destroy Caspar?'

'No,' Pilar said simply, and slammed the statue to the ground.

Existence hesitated for a moment. Everything, every living being, every inanimate object, every elf and demon and imp, even the earth itself paused for a moment as if to understand the implications of Pilar's action, then continued on as if nothing momentous had just happened.

But something did happen. The ugly, squat statue of a monkey hit the granite and mica and all the other minerals that went into forming the rocks and earth of the lodestone, and shattered into four pieces.

Caspar screamed and threw himself at us. I screamed (hoarsely), and stared with eyes filled with tears at the pieces of the statue. Paen lunged forward to stop Pilar, but the monkey god was too fast for him, leaping off the rock with a jubilant laugh.

Paen's beautiful silver eyes met mine, and I fell to my knees with the anguish I saw in them.

No. There has to be another way. This isn't the end.

It is, sweetheart. The debt can only be repaid by the statue, he answered, and grief so deep it seemed endless welled up inside him and spilled out onto me.

Caspar, in his twisted, horrific state, screamed in Chinese as he scrabbled at the remains of the statue. I grabbed one of the pieces, intending to brain him with it—not that I knew it would do anything to permanently harm him—when a thought struck.

'Here,' I snarled, snatching up a piece of the statue and throwing it at him before reaching for another piece. 'Here. And here, and here. You now have all the pieces of the Jilin God. The debt Paen's father incurred with you is now fulfilled! I demand acknowledgement of receipt of the statue before deep night!'

'You!' The twisted face of Caspar was a truly sickening sight to behold, but it was made almost unviewable by the hatred that filled it as his eyes raised to mine. Paen wrapped an arm around me and pulled me up so I was held tight to his body, his wonderful warmth soaking into me. 'You think you have won, but you have not. For I have this!'

From the head of the monkey statue Caspar withdrew a small, rolled-up bit of parchment. 'Behold, the