escaping one by one, anger seizes me in spite of myself, and I cannot prevent myself from saying very sharp and bitter things, which are sometimes even brutal, and which throw things back a hundred leagues. With Rosette I felt nothing of all this; never, even when she was resisting me the most, had I the idea that she wished to escape my love. I allowed her quietly to display all her little coquetries, and I endured with patience the somewhat long delays which it pleased her to inflict on my ardor. Her severity had something smiling in it which consoled you as much as possible, and in her most Hyrcanian cruelties you had a glimpse of a background of humanity which hardly allowed you to have any serious fear.
“Virtuous women, even when they are least so, have a cross and disdainful appearance which to me is intolerable. They always look as if they were ready to ring the bell and have you kicked out of the house by their lackeys; and I really think that a man who takes the trouble to pay his addresses to a woman (which as it is, is not so agreeable as one would fain believe) does not deserve to be looked at in that way.
“Our dear Rosette has no such looks-and, I assure you, that it is to her advantage. She is the only woman with whom I have been myself, and I have the conceit to say that I have never been so good. My wit is freely displayed, and by the dexterity and the fire of her replies she has made me discover more than I credited myself with, and more, perhaps, than I really have. It is true that I have not been very logical; that is scarcely possible with her. It is not, however, that she has not her poetical side, in spite of what De C- said about it; but she is so full of life, and force, and movement, she seems so well off in the atmosphere in which she is, that one has no wish to leave it in order to ascend into the clouds. She fills real life so agreeably, and makes such an amusing thing of it for herself and others, that dreamland has nothing better to offer you.
“What a wonderful thing! I have known her now for nearly two months, and during that time I have felt weary only when I was not with her. You will acknowledge that it is no ordinary woman that can produce such an effect, for usually women produce just the reverse effect upon me, and please me much more at a distance than when close at hand.
“Rosette has the best disposition in the world, with men, be it understood, for with women she is as wicked as a devil. She is gay, lively, alert, ready for everything, very original in her way of speaking, and always with some charming and unexpected drolleries to say to you. She is a delicious companion, a pretty comrade whom one is fond of, rather than a mistress, and if I had a few years more and a few romantic ideas less, it would be all one to me, and I should even esteem myself the most fortunate mortal in existence. But-but-a particle which announces nothing good, and this little limiting devil of a word is unfortunately more used than any other in all human languages; — but I am a fool, an idiot, a veritable ninny who can be satisfied with nothing, and who is always conjuring up difficulties where none exist, and I am only half happy instead of being wholly so. Half is a good deal for this world of ours, and yet I do not find it enough.
“In the eyes of all the world I have a mistress whom many wish for and envy me, and whom no one would disdain. My desire is therefore apparently fulfilled, and I have no longer any right to pick quarrels with fate. Yet I do not seem to have a mistress; I understand by reasoning that such is the case, but I do not feel it to be so, and if some one were to ask me unexpectedly whether I had one, I believe I should answer 'No.' Nevertheless, the possession of a woman who has beauty and wit constitutes what at all times and in all lands has been and is called having a mistress, and I do not think that any other mode exists. This does not prevent me from having the strangest doubts on the subject, and it has gone so far that if several persons were to conspire to affirm to me that I am not Rosette's favored lover, I should, in spite of the palpable evidence to the contrary, end by believing them.
“Do not imagine from what I have told you that I do not love her, or that she displeases me in any way. On the contrary, I love her very much, and I find her, as all the rest of the world will find her, a pretty, piquant creature. I simply do not feel that she is mine, and that is all. And yet no woman has ever made herself more engaging, and if ever I have understood what voluptuousness is, it was in her arms. A single kiss from her, the chastest of her endearments, makes me quiver to the soles of my feet, and sends all my blood flowing back to my heart. Account for all this if you can. It is just as I tell you. But the heart of man is full of such absurdities, and if it were necessary to reconcile all its contradictions, we should have enough to do.
“What can be the origin of this? In truth I do not know.
“I see her the whole day, and even the whole night if I wish. I give her all the caresses that I please when we are by ourselves both in town or in the country. Her complaisance is inexhaustible, and she enters thoroughly into all my caprices, however whimsical they may be. One evening I was seized with a fancy to roughly fondle her in the drawing-room, with the lustre and candles lighted, a fire on the hearth, the easy chairs arranged as if for a great evening reception, she dressed for a ball with her bouquet and fan, all her diamonds on her fingers and neck, plumes on her head, and in the most splendid costume possible, while I myself was dressed like a bear. She consented to my whim. When all was ready the servants were greatly surprised to receive an order not to allow anybody to come up; they did not seem to understand it in the least, and they went off with a dazed look which made us laugh greatly. Without doubt they thought that their mistress was distinctly mad, but what they did or did not think was of little moment to us.
“It was the drollest evening of my life. Imagine to yourself the appearance I must have presented with my plumed hat under my paw, rings on all my claws, a little sword with a silver guard, and a sky-blue ribbon at the hilt. I approached the fair one, and after making her a most graceful bow, seated myself by her side, and laid siege to her in all due form. The affected madrigals, the exaggerated gallantries which I addressed to her, all the jargon of the occasion was singularly set off by passing through my bear's muzzle, for I had a superb head of painted cardboard, which, however, I was soon obliged to throw under the table, so adorable was my deity that evening, and so greatly did I long to kiss her hand, and something better than her hand. The skin followed close on the head, for, not being accustomed to play the bear, I was greatly stifled in it more so than was necessary.
“The ball costume had then a fine time of it, as you may believe; the plumes fell like snow around my beauty, her round white shoulders were scarcely confined by the sleeves, her bosom heaved above her corset, her feet emerged from her shoes. The necklaces become unstrung and rolled on the floor, and I think that never was more fresh a dress more piteously crushed and rumpled; the dress was of silver gauze, with a lining of white satin. Rosette displayed on this occasion a heroism which was quite beyond that of her sex, and which gave me the highest opinion of her. She looked on at the wreck of her toilet as though she were a disinterested spectator, and not for a single instant did she show the least regret for her dress and her laces; on the contrary, she was madly gay, and even assisted herself in the ill-treatment to which her finery was subjected by me at the height of my frenzy.
“Do you not think this fine enough to be recorded in history beside the most splendid deeds of the heroes of antiquity? The greatest proof of love that a woman can give her lover is not to say to him: 'Take care not to rumple me or stain me,' especially if her dress is new. A new dress is a stronger motive for a husband's security than is commonly believed. Rosette must worship me, or she possesses a philosophy superior to that of Epictetus.
“However, I think that I paid Rosette the worth of her dress in caresses-a coin which is not the less esteemed and prized that it does not pass current with the shopkeepers. So much heroism as she displayed well deserved a reward, and, like a generous woman, she well repaid what I bestowed on her. I experienced a mad delight, such as I did not believe myself capable of feeling. Those sounding kisses mingled with piercing laughs, those quivering and impatient caresses, all that irritating enjoyment-that incomplete pleasure, a hundred times keener than if it had been without impediment, had such an effect upon my nerves that I was seized with acute spasms, from which I recovered with difficulty.
“You cannot imagine the tender and proud air with which Rosette looked at me, and the manner, full of joy and disquietude, in which she busied herself about me. Her face still radiated the pleasure which she felt at producing such an effect upon me, while at the same time, her eyes, bathed in gentle tears, bore witness to the fear that she experienced at seeing me ill, and the interest that she took in my health. Never has she appeared to me so beautiful as she did at that moment. There was something so maternal and so chaste in her look, that I totally forgot the more than Anacreonic scene which had just taken place, and, kneeling before her, asked permission to kiss her hand. This she granted me with singular gravity and dignity.
“Assuredly such a woman is not so depraved as De C- pretends, and as she has often seemed to myself. Her corruption is of the mind, and not of the heart.
“I have quoted this scene to you from among twenty others, and it seems to me that after this a man might, without extreme conceit, believe himself to be a woman's lover. Well, it is what I do not do. I had scarcely returned home when the same thought again took possession of me, and began to torment me as usual. I remembered
