Shadows Before the Sun

sleep.

* * *

Emma’s sweet voice saying hello and her soft kiss on my cheek made me smile, but I didn’t open my eyes right away. I’d slept damned good for once, thanks in part to Panopé healing my wounds. I’d vaguely acknowledged Emma and Rex coming home, heard the back door slam and the usual sounds of people in the house, but then must’ve drifted off again.

“I bet if you pinched her nose and covered her mouth, she’d wake up.”

Rex.

“She’s already awake, Rex.” Emma’s weight settled on my bed as I opened my eyes and stretched.

I pushed up to a sitting position and then froze, eyes widening in disbelief. “Rex!” He had pulled the chair from the small writing desk next to my bed, had his feet propped on the mattress, and was reading Sandra’s letter.

I leaned forward and swiped at it, but he was too fast, moving it over his head and out of reach. “That is mine. Give it back before I hurt you.”

One eyebrow lifted, then he handed it over. I snatched it and folded it back up, promising revenge with my look.

“So . . . what happened?” Emma asked. “Where’s Hank?”

I proceeded to give the short, PG-13 version of what had gone down in Fiallan, then turned my attention to my daughter, intending on asking her about her week and school—the usual. “Are you wearing eyeliner?”

She sat back, tucking her foot beneath her thigh. “No.” A beat passed. “Okay, yes, but just a little bit. You can barely tell.”

“You let her go to school like this?”

Rex rolled his eyes, huffed, and then studied Em’s face, shaking his head. “I don’t see anything.”

Emma, of course, grabbed on to that. “There. See, Mom. You can barely notice.”

“No makeup,” I told her, then glared at Rex. “How many fingers am I theoretically holding up?” I asked, meaning the middle finger.

“Funny. My eyesight is perfect. So what’s with the letter?”

“Gee, I don’t know . . . maybe that’s because I haven’t read it yet. You might’ve noticed it was sealed.”

Rex shrugged. “Might’ve. So?”

Emma made a grab for it. “Let me read it.”

I gave up, let it slip through my fingers, and fell back onto my pillows as Emma cleared her throat, intending to read it aloud. “Ohmigod, that is so freaky! She knew I’d read this to you! How cool is that? I just got goose bumps. Okay, starting over . . .

Since your daughter is reading this to you, I will behave. Charlie, I write this because my end has been revealed. I cannot see yours nor all the events that will lead me to mine—I only know that it will happen and I must follow the path Fate has laid out for me. I have, however, seen a glimpse of Death, and your future, when you drew it here last night to my club (thanks for listening by the way. You owe me three grand in damages).

Sachâth will soon recognize you as divine, and, stating the obvious here: it will kill you unless you kill it first. It’s you or it, Charlie. Plain and simple, no?

Ask yourself why it has been so successful, why the Archons themselves feared it. Not even they had the power to end its existence. Therefore, neither do you. Though, in a roundabout way, you do. Makes you crazy, doesn’t it? Welcome to my life.

Here’s the thing. I see random bits and pieces. I don’t see the complete picture. But (and I hate to say this) the things I have seen tell me that (gag) you and I bond, become (gag, again) friends, so I want to help you. Who knew, right? You will hurt for me, which is nice to know. I hurt now even though I don’t understand all of it.

Just know that I will be with my sister Fates in the end, and the prophecies I will continue to give will be more powerful than ever (if such a thing is possible, because, hello, World’s Best Oracle here).

And remember this: the Creator didn’t account for everything.

Bye, Charlie. I don’t get to say that in the end, so I’m saying it here.

~ Sandra.

P.S. I hope you find your siren.

P.P.S. On the three grand: I take cash, credit cards, and checks. Just give it to Tuni.

I pressed my palms to my eyes, feeling a sting in my throat and behind my eyelids. My chest felt like it had been punched. I wanted to laugh and cry, and wished to God that Sandra was still around so I could shake her and hug her. Damned oracle.

After a heavy moment, Emma cleared her throat and said, “So you have to figure out how to kill this Death person. And what’s an Archon?”

I sat up to find her sitting cross-legged, the letter in her lap, a thoughtful expression on her cute face, and a dimple in her cheek that told me she was biting the inside like I often did. I stayed quiet, not about to clue my kid into the fact that First Ones still existed, but I couldn’t deny the threat that Sachâth posed.

“But you won’t be able to,” she continued, however, not waiting for me to answer. “But you kind of can.”

“Frustrating, isn’t it?” Rex told her. “Oracles are always like that. Take my advice, avoid them at all costs.”

I told them about Sandra’s prophecy. Accept yourself to make the shadow whole . . . together, together . . . but not by your hand . . . and death will come to death . . .

“So, if you accept yourself, you make the shadow whole . . .” Rex said, resting his chin on the teepee of his fingers. “Whole could mean physical. If it’s physical, flesh and blood, it can be killed.”

“And accepting yourself could just mean all your powers coming together or something,” Em said. “And not by your hand . . . does that mean you use your power, Mom? Like from a distance? I don’t get it.”

I sighed. I’d already worked most of what they were saying out for myself. “I don’t, either.” And I needed to work it out because I sure as hell couldn’t call Sachâth here to fight unless I knew how to defeat it.

“The oracle seems certain you become divine,” Rex observed.

I’d definitely come into a strange sort of power in Fiallan; the fact that I could use my arm with the same effect as Ahkneri’s sword; the fact that everything seemed to work together inside of me to make that happen. It hadn’t been just one power, but all of them, everything inside of me, all the human and off-world genes coming together. And I was starting to suspect that I’d had a little help in that department from a certain earth sylph who had once told me I was fractured on the inside and offered to fix me. I’d temporarily been given the gift of Nwyvre, the Hidden Element, in order to save my sister Bryn, and now I was starting to believe it had brought peace to the warring powers inside of me, made me whole.

“How much homework do you have?” I asked Emma.

“A ton. Geometry and more Geometry, Astrology, and I have to study for a Crafting Vocab quiz tomorrow.”

“You’d better get started, then,” I said.

Since it was only four o’clock in the afternoon, and Sandra’s letter burned in my brain, I decided to pay a visit to the one being I knew had some answers. “I need to make a quick stop at the Grove and grab another cell phone from the station.” I already had a duplicate ID, badge, and weapons at the house, but the cell would have to be configured with my old number and contacts by the tech guy at the station. “How about I pick up a pizza on the way back and then I can help you study? Sound good?”

“Two pizzas,” Rex said.

“One cheese,” Emma said.

“One with everything. And get some of those breadsticks,” Rex added. “And you’ve got yourself a deal.”

I stuffed the letter back into the envelope and then held out my arms to Emma. “Hug.”