The three of us walked awkwardly and silently out to the car until Gretchen spoke. “Holy shit, we almost forgot, Del!” Gretchen and I turned to Quilla. She looked at Gretchen. “Near the end Aunt Brandy got interested in cemeteries, remember?”
Gretchen paused for a moment, then smiled and nodded her head. “Vaguely. It was kind of touching. One of the nurses was involved with that… what’s it called?”
“Making tracings of headstones,” I said.
“Yes. In Brandy’s new frame of mind she became open to new things, however odd. The nurse’s enthusiasm for taking tracings turned Brandy on to it. I think they went out and did it together a few times. That’s about all I remember.”
Before Quilla got in the car she hugged Gretchen. As she ran around to the driver’s side, I smiled stupidly at Gretchen and she back at me. What was there to say? How do you make small talk after a discussion like we’d just had? As we pulled out of the driveway Gretchen waved. I wasn’t sure if the gesture was for Quilla or both of us. We’d gone less than twenty yards when Quilla said, “Isn’t she neat?”
“Yeah. She’s very nice.”
“She must like you.”
“Why do you say that?” I couldn’t wait for her answer.
“She told you about her father and the murder and him being in the institution. She must’ve felt safe with you.”
“Is that good?”
“Gretchen’s very particular about who she gets close to. The clincher was when she told you about how she tried to kill herself. Bizarre, huh? You don’t think people as together as Gretchen would ever try suicide.”
I didn’t respond. I thought of the numerous inexplicable suicides I’d buried. “So where should I drop you?”
“Nowhere. I’m coming with you.”
“No you’re not. I’m about to pick up a body.”
“It’d be interesting to see how a body gets picked up.”
“Haven’t you had a enough death in your life for awhile?”
“C’mon. I won’t get in the way or ask stupid questions.”
“Number one, it’s illegal for an unlicensed person to be in a vehicle that’s transporting a body.”
“I won’t tell if you won’t.”
“And number two, this is no ordinary funeral. It’s going to be a lot of work.”
“Why? Who died? Like, the Mayor of Dankworth?”
“The owner of Dankworth’s other Funeral Home.”
She rolled her eyes. “That’s weird. Aren’t you, like, competitors?”
“His son asked me to do it. Look, I’m sorry to be so abrupt, but I have to get on this right away. Where would you like me to drop you off?”
“Nowhere. I’m staying with you.”
“I have to work.”
“
“This is going to be a very stressful twenty-four hours for me. Organizing some funerals is like planning a big wedding.”
Quilla slammed her left hand on the seat. “I don’t want to be alone. Okay?”
“I’ll take you to Spider’s house.”
“His name is Viper. He’ll still be in therapy.”
“What about some of your other friends?”
“They’re all in school.”
“Then I’ll take you home. Wait ’til they get out.”
She again slammed her right hand on the dashboard and burst into tears. “I don’t want to be by myself!”
“Why don’t you just go to school?”
“On the day my aunt is buried?”
I was suddenly glad I didn’t have children.
“Can I just hang with you until Viper gets out of his therapy session?”
“No. That’s it. Now, tell me where you want to go.”
“Nowhere!” she said. “Let me out here. Stop the car.”
“Quilla…”
“Stop the car!”
“Alright. Fine.” I stopped the car. Without saying a word, she opened the door, got out and slammed it. She walked a few yards and leaned against an oak tree, staring downward.
I waited a few seconds, then drove off slowly, looking at Quilla in my rear view mirror. I’d gone maybe twenty yards when I saw her look in my direction, then slide down the tree and onto the ground into a sitting position. I felt sorry for her and even though having her in the car with me with Alphonse’s body would be highly inappropriate, I felt that her being alone would be worse. I backed up the car, stopped in front of her, leaned over and opened the door. “Get in.”
She smiled, stood up and ran into the car.
“Promise me you won’t tell anyone that I let you in a car with a body.”
“No problem. Like, the only person I know who would be interested is Viper. By the way, did he talk to you about being a make-up man on bodies?”
“Yes. I mean, no. He didn’t say anything about being a restoration man — that’s what it’s called. He said he was interested in being a Funeral Director.”
“He’s just confused. He thought he wanted to be a hair stylist or a make-up consultant, but lately he’s been thinking about working on bodies.”
“Then he shouldn’t talk to me. He should talk to the person who does that for me.”
“Should Viper call
“No. I’ll have to check with Nolan first.”
She suddenly got a serious look on her face, then said, “This
“Yes.”
“What a job — touching dead bodies.”
I nodded noncommittally, but to myself said, “You don’t know the half of it.”
As we headed to DiGregorio’s my thoughts turned to the irony of me handling Alphonse’s funeral. It was another of the many “firsts” in the career of a Funeral Director. The first corpse you embalm. The first child you bury. The first pretty girl. The first relative. The first friend. But there is one “first” that you remember above all others. Or more accurately, you can’t forget: the first murdered body you come in contact with.
The horror of how life can turn out for some infects you with a sober realization that there are people in the world to be feared.
Chapter 15
“Here we are,” I said as I pulled into the lot of DiGregorio’s Funeral Home and headed round to the back where the body would be waiting. “I’ll be back in a few minutes.”
“Thanks for letting me come along.”
I nodded to her and went to get Alphonse DiGregorio. The corpse was ready for me to remove. It was covered only by a white sheet, resting on a gurney in a holding area by the service entrance at the back of the building. This was where all bodies came in. Most bodies left by way of DiGregorio’s front entrance on their way to their final resting place. The only bodies that went out this way were the direct disposals: people who were going to be cremated without ceremony, without benefit of family friends.
