'My guess is that she's upset about her brother.'
'You're not making any sense.' His tone was flat. He was walling up.
'I am making perfect sense. Your daughter wanted to know your son; you didn't want her to know him. It weighed on her something terrible. Now he's missing. How can you be absolutely certain the two have nothing to do with each other?'
'I'm sure.'
'What if she told him, and he killed himself?' Grace's heart pounded. She didn't like the look on his face-blank, flat, cold. Like the times she'd wanted to be a partner and he'd argued it would look bad, like all the times he'd fought her on raises, like the time Dylan wanted to go to a private university and he'd refused to pay for it. He was out to lunch on this, too.
'She's loyal. She loves me. She wouldn't do that to me,' he said.
'Are you implying I'm not loyal?' A tear came to Grace's eye. After everything she'd sacrificed for him?
'You want to expose me, bankrupt me, ruin my life after all I've done for you?' he said, gaining energy with the prospect of such a huge betrayal.
'I get the feeling you don't care about your son.' She'd always supported herself. He'd never even supported her. She stared at him, stunned by a new disturbing thought. He didn't care about her, that she'd guessed. But he didn't care about his precious son, his legitimate child, either.
'Maybe he let me down,' he said. More tragedy king.
'Your perfect son let you down?' She shook her head, amazed to hear this. Her Jerry was a cold man, an iceberg.
'You're in a strange mood this morning,' he remarked. 'What's the matter with you?'
'How did Maslow let you down?'
'Look, forget I said that.'
'I get the feeling you don't care whether he lives or dies.'
'I'm under a lot of stress. I didn't mean it.' He pointedly checked his watch, then made the hand motion again to dismiss her. She didn't budge.
'I've accepted your demands for secrecy all these years, Jerry-'
'Well, of course you did. You're the woman I love. You're everything to me.'
'That's why you support your wife's credit card bills and go on vacations with her instead of me?'
'But I don't like it. I'd much rather be with you.'
'Men don't go on vacations with women they can't bear to be in the same room with.'
'You're twisting my words again. Look, it's eight-thirty. I have to-'
'What about the press? What about
'Don't threaten me,' he said angrily. 'I won't take it. Not today.'
'I'm trying to get through to you, Jerry. Dylan has been following Maslow.'
'How do you know?' He swiveled back and forth in his chair.
'I know. She told me she was going to meet him.'
'When?' More swiveling.
'I don't know. Months ago. I didn't think anything about it. She's been upset ever since you wouldn't let her go to Swarthmore.'
He made an angry noise. 'For Christ's sake, that was three years ago, and City College was good enough for me, wasn't it?'
'Maybe for you, but not for Maslow.'
'Maslow was different,' he said harshly.
Grace sighed. 'That's exactly what Dylan thinks. Your legitimate son is better than she is.'
'Go away, Grace, I'm disgusted with you. If you loved me you wouldn't hurt me this way now.'
'You hurt your daughter. You hurt me. And now Maslow. You only care about your precious reputation, your precious business. What about the rest of us? I can't let this go on, Jerry. I can't.' She shook her head sadly. 'I can't. Not now.'
'All right, I know. I know. I don't know what comes over me. Of course you're important. You're everything to me. I'll tell.' He shook his head with great conviction. 'I'm going to do it. You'll see.'
'You have to call the police today.'
'No! Not today. It would kill my wife.'
'You should have thought about that earlier. Now it's too late. You have to help them find Maslow. You have to tell them everything you know about him and about Dylan so that they can find him.'
'If you're so certain she knows something, why don't you ask Dylan yourself. No, I'll ask her,' he said, resolving the issue to his satisfaction.
'She didn't come
He sighed hugely. 'I'll take care of it. Trust me.'
'I can't trust you,' she said softly. 'I'll tell the police about Dylan myself.'
'You don't mean that, sweetheart. She's your baby. You don't want to hurt her, expose her to all kinds of questions and ridicule, do you? Really?'
'I mean it.' Grace's eyes flooded. 'The children have to come first this time.'
'Okay.' His facade cracked, and he caved in the way he had over the raises but not anything else. 'Okay, there is somebody I can tell. Not the police. But somebody who can help. Okay? Are you satisfied now?'
'I'll be satisfied when both your children are safe.' Grace got up and walked out of the office without another word.
Evelyn was at her desk with that smug smile on her face. 'Raise time again, Grace?' she said as Grace passed her on the way out.
Forty-one
When baby April opened her eyes with Thursday's dawn, her daddy was standing watch over her crib, wearing a T-shirt and purple briefs. Today, she didn't even have to look around for him or whimper for attention. He'd been awake, worrying for hours. He was actually waiting for her to wake up and keep him company.
'Hey, little sweetheart,' Jason cooed at her.
'Aa aa.' She smiled and reached up her arms.
Not quite Dada, but close enough. He picked her up, hugged and kissed her a little, changed her diaper, gave her a bottle, played with her for a few minutes, then went into the bedroom.
'Hi,' Emma murmured.
Jason sat on the bed, kissed Emma for a while, then put April down beside her sleepy mother. Bolstered by the love of his family, he began his day. He had a seven a.m. patient, an eight o'clock patient, a nine o'clock patient, and a dozen messages, including calls from Ted Tushy, Bernie Zeiss, Miss Vialo, and three other prominent members of the Institute. They might all have innocent reasons for calling late last night, and again before he was even in the office this morning, but Jason thought it was more likely that he was in trouble. Last night he'd gone to the Institute in search of Maslow's and Allegra's files. Several events were going on when he got there. Dr. Cone's second Wednesday of the month discussion group, two committee meetings, and a supervisory group were enough activity to cover his unauthorized visits to the education office for Allegra's file and to the boardroom where, due to overcrowding at the Institute, some of the personnel and candidate files were kept.
He collected them with no trouble and left, thinking it was likely to be more difficult to obtain a list of all the patients with whom Maslow had come into contact at Manhattan East. After he got home and studied the files without learning very much that was new, he rolled around all night wondering if there was any possibility that Allegra could have been a patient and seen Maslow at Manhattan East. Allegra wasn't her real name, and it was