If she keeps eye contact with you—worse has her hands on her hips or arms crossed—you’re in deep shit; you’d better listen to what she has to say. She’s already pissed; you don’t want to piss her off more by making her repeat herself.
Chapter 13: There’s a better way to kiss her good night
The end of the date tends to stressful for both men and women. The woman’s thinking, ‘Is he going to try to kiss me?’ The guy is thinking, ‘Is she going to let me kiss her?’ It doesn’t have to be this awkward.
You’re at the girl’s door and she hasn’t asked you in. If she asks you in, don’t be a fool—go in.
She’ll probably thank you for a nice night out. You tell her it was your pleasure and then you make eye contact and slowly enter her personal space. If she steps back, she doesn’t want to be kissed. Give her a polite smile, wave good-bye, and leave. You’ve been rejected with the least amount of awkwardness possible. Depending on how good the rest of the date was, you may or may not want to call her again.
If she doesn’t step back, she wants to kiss you. Congratulations, now get it done as confidently as possible.
There aren’t that many opportunities in real life to watch other people kiss. I’ve noticed that in movies, the guy seems to always move forward for the kiss rather than pulling the girl toward him. Most women at one point in their life have had a fantasy of being swept away by a man. Pulling the girl toward you plays into that fantasy.
There’s only one first kiss in a relationship. You might as well sweep her away. Reach out with one hand and place it on the small of her back, pull her toward you, and kiss her.
Chapter 14: Say the right words before she does
Please skip this chapter if you’re not interested in premarital sex. I seriously considered leaving this chapter out because it’s the only chapter where I’m going to teach you something that’s completely manipulative. After much thought and internal debate, I asked myself if I wanted my own son to know this trick. My answer was yes, which led to another question. Would I want my daughter to know this trick? Every player I’ve ever met uses this technique. I decided I absolutely wanted my daughter to recognize when this trick was being used on her.
It’s a simple secret. If you tell a girl, “I don’t want to sleep with you tonight. I want to take it slow” before she does, the chances of you being able to sleep with her that night will skyrocket.
If you say those words first, she won’t. If you’re the only one saying “We should slow down”, no one slows down. If she says “We need to slow down”, she will slow everything down.
The probability is high that when you say these words, you will be lying—that you really do want to sleep with her tonight and you don’t want to go slow. If you’re a horrible liar, for God’s sake don’t lie. The point of using techniques is to improve your chances, not decrease them.
I always used this line after the girl and I started making out. As soon as I felt her hesitate or tense slightly, I’d pull away and tell her I cared too much about the future of our relationship to want to hurry things. If I delivered the line right, her face would soften and then I’d start kissing her again.
I can tell you from considerable personal experience the technique is extremely effective. I can’t tell you why. My best guess is that it’s one of those differences between male and female brains that often make us mutually incomprehensible to each other.
Chapter 15: Know when to hold them; know when to fold them
Never stay with a woman out of fear. There’s nothing more pitiful than a man who stays with a woman who’s not good enough because he thinks he can’t do better.
If you learn how to pick up girls, you won’t ever have to be a coward. You’ll be able to break up with any woman, confident you’ll be able to get another.
There are as many differences among human beings as there are similarities. From the very first, I’ve tried to make it clear that my techniques will only work for guys who know how to think. I’ve dated and have been with a lot of women, but I’m not trying to claim that my insights are universal to the rest of the 3.5 billion females on our planet. I feel that I have a reasonable statistical sampling, but my advice is based only on my personal experience.
I encourage you to read this book with a skeptical mind. If my descriptions and analyses of women don’t match the women you know, make your own analyses and judgments.
Life is better if you can problem solve. I often see men who have no problem debugging code or fixing engines freeze helplessly when they have woman problems. Yes, women are complicated, but that doesn’t mean you can’t use your mind to figure them out.
It’s ridiculous for a man who can learn how to use Linux to NOT learn how to predict women. It’s silly for a guy who can repair and maintain his home, vehicle, tools and equipment to not learn how to fix and maintain his own relationship.
If you’re heterosexual, you need to prioritize! Women are more important than gear or video games!
Nothing here is written in stone, and I am certainly not inspired by God. You don’t have to agree with me; my goal is to have you problem solve women and relationships the same way you do code, engines, plumbing, and wiring.
If what I recommend makes sense, try to follow my advice. If it doesn’t, try to come up with your own solutions.
There are countless books out there sorting women into different types. The American Psychiatric Association publishes the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM). If you want an exhaustive list of every mental disorder than people can get, this is a good resource
For our purposes, I’ll separate women into three types: normal, victim, and vampire. I encourage you to stay with the normals and avoid the victims and vampires.
Normal women react normally. If you treat them well, they’re happy. If you treat them badly, they’re not. When life goes well, they’re content. When bad things happen, they get depressed.
Normal women’s brains are hardwired differently than normal men’s brains. Because of this, to a certain degree all women are crazy to all men and vice versa. But there are normal differences and abnormal differences. I’ll discuss victims and vampires in later chapters. I’ll focus on normal women in this chapter.
Our desires come from our innermost instincts. Outside the need to survive, one of man’s strongest instinctive desires is to have sex with as many attractive women as possible. Further down the list of priorities is our need to be with a woman we love. It’s common for us to pursue a woman with everything we’ve got, and then completely lose interest as soon as we catch her. When this happens, it reveals that the only thing that was driving us was lust and that the woman had nothing else we wanted.
It’s unfortunate, but most men (and this certainly includes me) are too dumb to know when their desire is driven by true attraction or just pure lust. I’m certain there are enormous advantages to being celibate until you get married. Never having tried that, I can’t tell you what they are. One of the advantages of premarital sex is that once you’re done, you get immediate visceral feedback about how you really feel about the woman you’re with.
If you have sex with a girl and afterwards you immediately want to head for the horizon, then Run Forrest, Run—just as far and as fast as you can. Your subconscious is telling you that the only thing going on between you and her is physical, and that once your hormonal needs are satisfied, there’s nothing left.
It’s not uncommon for a girl who makes you to want to flee to have great traits. If you pursued her and slept with her, by definition she was physically attractive. Often she’ll have other traits such as a good sense of humor or common interests. You might be tempted to try to make it work, especially after a few days when you’ve gotten horny again.
