Ivy looked away in guilt, and I remembered the wild abandonment I’d seen time and again at Piscary’s under Kisten’s management, living vampires going there to lie to themselves that life was good and they had the world on a string. They needed knowing that there was a way out, perhaps more than they knew.
My eyes were warm with unshed tears, and Ivy blinked fast when she pulled her hand out from under mine. She wanted to believe, but it was hard for her to accept others sacrificing for her.
“Keep Nina safe,” I said, hiding my hand under the table. A resolve had filled me somewhere between finding Felix in my kitchen and Ivy stumbling home last night crying over someone else’s pain. I couldn’t let Ivy suffer the hell I’d seen Felix trapped in. I had to find a way to save her soul.
“Thank you,” Ivy whispered, her motion slow as she balled up her ecofriendly napkin. Taking a deep breath, I could almost see her focus on the “now.” “It was a rough night. It took six of us to hold her down when the bloodlust hit her. If this goes okay, I’m going to try to be there when she wakes up so she knows I’m . . . okay.”
She couldn’t look at me, and I wished she wasn’t so ashamed of what we had to do to survive. We all fell. What mattered was what we did after that. “Tell Nina for me that she can do this, okay? That it’s worth it.”
“I will,” she whispered. “Next time I see her. Thank you.”
Tears pricked my eyes, but I was smiling and so was she. Nina was strong. She would survive. I never would have thought that Ivy would ever be on the other end of the addiction, and I was proud of her.
Ivy’s gaze flicked past me. She didn’t move, but something shifted in her, a predator’s quiet breath slipped in and out, and I suppressed a shudder. Just that fast, everything changed.
Reaching for a napkin, I pretended to dab my mouth as I turned to the line. “Is that her?” I said, seeing a blonde with her sweater cut low and her spring skirt cut high. She was in a tight jacket, and she seemed to know everyone behind the counter, talking loud and cheerful as she flirted, waiting for her turn.
Ivy was already reaching for her purse. “Yes,” she said, standing up and not looking at her. “Five minutes to eight. Right on time.”
Jenks dropped down, his wings giving me a bare instant of warning. “She came in in the blue Mustang,” he said, still picking napkin from between his fingers. “I think it’s new since the cover is open. It’s too cold for that unless it’s your first convertible. I’ll get you the keys, Ivy. You’re going to want that top closed.”
“Thanks,” she said, giving me a soft smile before she turned away and breezed out, coming within inches of the woman.
I stood as the blond woman shivered as if chilled. “Chicken,” I berated Jenks as I moved to get in line right behind her.
“You think I’m going to get involved in that heart-to-heart women crap?” he said as he snuggled in behind my scarf. “Hell, no! Aw, she’s sweet! You sure we have to lock her in the trunk?”
“Holy toad piss,” Jenks muttered. “This woman is even bouncier than you after you’ve got some, Rache.”
“Shut up, Jenks.”
“I haven’t seen you like that in . . . hell, how long has it been?”
“Shut up!” I muttered, tightening my scarf until he called uncle, laughing at me. It had been a while, and even worse, it had been with Pierce. Everyone I had sex with died. Except Marshal, and that had only been because he left in time.
Adrenaline hit me when Ms. Bouncy-Hair finished her transaction, catching my eye as she moved to the pickup counter. She must have heard me telling Jenks to shut up, but being the crazy woman would only help, and I gave her a neutral smile and hitched my shoulder bag higher. Sweet or not, she was our fast and dirty ticket into the museum and behind security doors. I hated locking people in their own trunks. Except for Francis. That had been fun.
I was still wearing my smile as I stepped up to the counter. “Ah, two grandes, black. A skinny chai tea tall, and a vanilla grande with a shot of pumpkin in it if you still have it.” I knew they did. The drinks I ordered were was the exact same ones Ms. Bouncy-Hair had ordered, right down to the size. “Oh, and can you put it all in a to-go bag? Thanks.”
“Got it,” the barista said, never looking up, never noticing it was a duplicate order. Junior would have, and I was glad he wasn’t here.
I handed the barista a bill to cover it, turning around to see the blue Mustang in the parking lot, the top still open to the sky. “Thank you,” I said around a yawn as he gave me my change. Eight? Was it really eight? Adrenaline or not, this was an insane time to be up. That was humanity’s problem right there. They were brain damaged from the early sun.
“Ah, Rache?” Jenks whispered, poking me in the neck, and I jumped, giving the barista a faint smile as I moved down.
I stood just inside most people’s personal zone, and sure enough, Ms. Bouncy-Hair noticed, shifting down a smidge. My pulse quickened. I couldn’t help it. Maybe I was as bad as Ivy. When the woman’s order slid onto the counter in one of those paper trays, I was ready.
“Thanks, Bill!” she called out cheerfully, reaching for it as I leaned in as if going for it too. The woman got there first, her hands full of hot coffee as she turned, smashing right into my upraised hand. It would have gone all over me, but I was the one planning accidents, and with a little flip, it went down her front instead.
“What the fuck!” the woman exclaimed, staggering back with her entire order spilled on the floor. Well, not all of it, and her pink V-neck sweater was now an ugly brown.
“Ooh, mouthy,” Jenks said, and I heard him take to the air, wings clattering.
My shock was fake, but it looked real enough. I’d had plenty of practice. “Oh, my gosh!” I exclaimed, standing there with my eyes wide and hands up in the helpless-me position. “I am so-o-o-o sorry!”
The baristas were already moving to mop it up, and she dropped back to the tables and chairs, disgust swamping her. “Bill, can I have another set?” she said, and then muttered at me, “Why don’t you watch where you’re going,” as if embarrassed for the F bomb she’d dropped.
She was on the defensive, and that was fine with me. It didn’t make the guilt any less, but it did tend to put it off till later.
“Oh my God, I’m so, so sorry,” I said, grabbing napkins like mad and shoving them at her. “Here, let me give you my address,” I said, head down and fumbling in my bag as she took them, dabbing at her front until she realized it was useless. Jenks was at the ceiling, and I dumped my bag out to distract her when the napkins hadn’t done it. “I’ve got a card in here somewhere. Send me the bill for your cleaning. Oh, that’s got angora in it, doesn’t it? I can tell.”
“Seriously, it’s okay,” she said, but she was watching me now, not Jenks in her purse. Hell, everyone was watching me. Ivy and Jenks had helped me stock my bag, and the tampons, diaphragm, jumbo condoms, and fuzzy cuffs that Jenks had picked out were garnering snickers.
“I am such a klutz,” I said, snatching up the pen Ivy had given me from a Hollows strip joint. I scribbled the downtown bus depot’s address on a matchbook.
“No, really, it’s okay,” she said, hand up to keep me at arm’s length. Her expression was a mix of disgust and contempt. I was a doofus, and everyone could tell.
“Please, just take it,” I said, and she finally did just to shut me up. “I must have been half asleep.” My order came up in its bag, and the woman realized she was going to have to go home and change. I could see it in her eyes. Behind her in the parking lot, the top was almost closed. “At least let me pay for your drinks!” I said, reaching out as if I was going to take her arm.
She backed off fast. “I already paid for them,” she said, bouncy no more. Grimacing, she plucked at her sweater and looked at her watch. “Bill, I gotta go. Forget the coffee.”
“Catch you tomorrow, Barbie,” one called, and I almost choked. Barbie? Really? Was that legal?
But the car again had a roof. “Wait! Your coffee!” I exclaimed, taking my own bag of duplicate brew and
