Switch

'I've been working out.' Leave it to my dad to compliment

me while making me feel bad at the same time.

'We just got an eliptical trainer and a Bowflex. You can

come over and use it if you want.' My dad thickly buttered

a rol already glistening with grease.

'There's a gym in my apartment building, but thanks.' I

didn't even take a rol, thinking of the word discipline and

what it meant to me. I didn't point out how little sense it

made for me to drive al the way to my dad's house to

work out.

work out.

'You could stop by anyway some time this week. Check it

out.'

In the past I'd have given him an awkward laugh and

shrugged off the invitation knowing that though he meant

the offer, he wouldn't notice if I didn't take him up on it.

Real invitations, the ones I was expected to take, came

from Stela and always had. Now, though, something in the

way he said it sounded different.

'Sure, I guess I could.'

'Your brother's been giving us a bit of a rough time,' my

dad said.

Interrupted by the waitress bringing our soup, I didn't

answer at first. My dad, as was typical of him, ignored the

server, spiling his guts in front of a stranger when I'd have

preferred the decency of a few minutes' wait. Ah, wel, it

wasn't my secret.

'Jeremy,' he added. 'He's been acting up in school, getting into trouble at home. Won't listen to a damn thing we tel

him.'

him.'

I didn't think pointing out giving in to your child's every

whim was bound to catch up to you would be appropriate,

so I made some sympathetic murmurs and wondered why

my dad was sharing.

'He's been realy mouthy to me.'

'Kids go through stages, don't they?'

My dad gave me a fond smile. 'You never have.'

Choices. We al make them, sometimes more than once.

Sometimes it's the choices we make over and over that

define us, but more often it's the ones we don't.

'Kids who feel confident in their parents' affections can

take the risk of acting out,' I said calmly. 'I gave my mom a heluva hard time growing up.'

My dad's not a stupid man, though he is deliberately blind

to certain things. He sighed. 'Paige. I know I haven't

always been there for you.'

I lifted my spoon to give my hands something to do, but it

clattered against the bowl and I didn't want to risk spiling

clattered against the bowl and I didn't want to risk spiling

the soup, so I put the spoon down. Of al the awkward