Austin I loved him without knowing for sure I could let him
love me.
'I have to go,' I said, but didn't hang up. I even loved his breathing, the familiar in-and-out of it. I wanted to hold on
to it for a minute longer.
'Paige,' Austin said in a low voice. 'Remember what I said.'
Whatever it takes.
I remembered.
'I have to go, Austin. I'l cal you. Later.'
I hung up that time. I wanted to cry. And then I did.
'Paige. How nice to see you again. What can I do for you
today? Something pretty for a friend? Something nice for
yourself?' Miriam's warm, crimson-painted smile didn't
urge an answering grin from me.
It wasn't her fault. I felt as white and thin as paper held to
a too-bright light. I felt ready to tear.
'Something for me.' I already knew what I needed, but
before I could head for the back room where she kept her
files of writing papers, Miriam came around the counter.
'My dear, you look awful,' she said without any pretense
of diplomacy. 'You sit down and have some tea right now.
Or better yet, come here.'
She gestured and I folowed. She took me into a back
room marked Private and sat me down in a spindly but
comfortable chair in front of a polished wood table. I sat
gratefuly; my knees were a little shaky. She didn't pour me
tea from a pot, but she heated water in a smal microwave
and gave me my choice of tea bags from a smal container.
She didn't ask me to reveal my secrets. Not that I would
have. I didn't know Miriam al that wel, and though she
was old enough to be my grandmother she'd never acted
like one. I was glad for the tea, though. She passed me a
cookie from a tin, too.
'Sugar helps,' she said.
I nibbled. 'With what?'
'With everything!' Miriam laughed an entirely sexy laugh
and I could easily imagine her as the 1940's pinup girl she
must've been. 'There, now. Your color's coming back.'
Apparently I hadn't just felt like paper, I'd looked like it,
too. 'Thanks, Miriam. But I have to get going. I have an…
appointment.'
'Ah.' She nodded and smiled. 'And you need something
special for it, yes? Something special to write on?'
I swalowed sweetness but tasted bitterness. 'Yes.'
I swalowed sweetness but tasted bitterness. 'Yes.'
'I have just the thing.' Miriam held up a finger and got up from the table to pul down a large album from one of the
shelves.
Covered in what looked like leather, the album opened to
reveal sheets of paper, al types, each bound inside the