explained Nick's midnight visit: After Lynn had told Nick and Donny of Cree's interest in the ravine, they had gotten worried that maybe she'd uncovered some evidence. Nick had come back to see if anyone had been digging in the area.
It was a horrible story, and Julieta had taken it hard. But thinking back, she said, there'd been little clues-a word dropped by Garrett or Donny now and again, a smug and cruel look. Even Lynn Pierce seemed to know something about it. Just Wednesday, the nurse had made veiled allusions to Julieta's past, to others knowing her secrets.
What concerned Cree now was Peter's call to Joseph. Julieta would be justified in blaming Joseph for deflecting him toward Garrett's murderous rage. And that would ruin everything.
As if she'd read Cree's mind, Julieta turned to look back at the walking men. 'Joseph. He'll blame himself.'
'Yeah. But, more important, will you?'
Julieta shook her head. 'There were so many bad choices that ended up there. All the big ones were mine. Trying to be a beauty queen. Marrying Garrett. Not divorcing him the moment I knew what was going on. Getting pregnant. If I'd had my head on my shoulders one goddamned time-'
'Hey, Julieta. You want my advice?'
Cree's tough tone startled her, and she looked over wide-eyed.
'My advice is, screw the self-blame. If Garrett had been a halfway decent person, none of it would have happened. Neither of you can take responsibility for what an impulsive, philandering, arrogant, violent man did!'
Julieta stared straight ahead. Cree could only hope she'd get there eventually.
Off to the west, Joyce was bucketing along and whooping for joy. Who'd have guessed? Cree asked herself.
'Did Peter know Tommy was his son?' Julieta asked.
' 'Know' isn't the right word. I doubt Peter knew he occupied anyone's body. Peter's ghost replayed its memory for fifteen years, there in the ravine, until one day it came across a really compatible environment, a vehicle for the expression of its compulsion. Obviously, there's some kind of natural resonance between kin. Maybe someday we'll figure out how it works. But right now, I don't know.'
'But… why out at the ravine? Why not back at the house?'
Cree hadn't told her the details, but there was no dodging it now. 'He wasn't quite dead when Nick buried him. The rocks Nick knocked down were what finally killed Peter.'
Appalled, Julieta sagged. When she straightened again, her lips were pressed tight, white with rage.
This was another close passage for Julieta. If she became obsessed with retribution, no matter how richly deserved, her liberation would not be complete. 'I know exactly what you're feeling. But Joyce and Ed and I were talking about that last night. We all agree there's not going to be any evidence of who killed Peter. Not fifteen years later. His bones will show he was murdered, but there won't be any way to pin it on Garrett or Nick.'
Cree looked over at Julieta and could see that it wasn't going down easy. She wondered if Julieta could get past this, relinquish her rage over even so great an injustice. There was so much at stake. Julieta was just beginning life as a free person. Cree was certain she and Joseph had already become lovers, but Julieta would have to leave a lot behind if the two of them were to be happy. She could still be deflected back so easily.
But you could give someone only so much advice.
They were not far from the ravine now, and Julieta's small, private duty to the dead. They stopped their horses and waited for the men to catch up.
Joyce was trotting back, cheeks bright with high desert air, stoned absolutely gonzo on so much light and space. 'My behind is going to be sore for a week and I won't regret a minute of it!' she sang. Then she remembered their errand and sobered quickly.
Julieta and Joseph walked toward the mesa, hand in hand, getting smaller against the cliffs and then disappearing as they went between the walls of the ravine. Cree tethered the horses to a clump of sagebrush and she and Joyce and Edgar sat on the ground. The detailed debriefing would wait until they were back in Seattle, but they took out their canteens and talked about Tommy, about the psychological state and environment that had primed him for the possession. They talked about the independent hand, and what it suggested about the mechanics of possession. They tried to guess at the hypnotic or paralytic effect that surrounded him when the ghost was resurgent; Ed theorized that maybe the antagonism between two different brain frequencies created an electromagnetic field strong enough to affect others. For a while they talked about the role of blood relationship in hauntings, ancestor spirits, the principle of blood to blood and like to like.
Joyce shook her head. 'Here I've always bitched about how my mother is trying to live vicariously through me. But she's got nothing on this Peter guy!
They all laughed at that.
'But what about these ghosts?' Joyce asked, tipping her head toward the ravine. 'Here Ed and I did all that work, found out about old Yil' Dezbah and her family, and then we find out they had nothing to do with it. But why did Tommy draw the faces in the cliffs?'
'A period of acute sensitivity, triggered by his sudden invasion by Peter?' Cree proposed. 'Or maybe Tommy's something of a natural sensitive and subconsciously picked up on their presence. Or maybe just his… hunger to know his parents, his forebears, had a role-primed him, made him more vulnerable.' She shrugged. 'Personally, I think that's one of the factors that made him receptive to Peter's revenant.'
'Which, of course, we'll never know,' Edgar muttered.
Joyce sifted soil through her fingers. 'So… you want to do some work on the ghosts here?'
Cree looked at the mesa, the lonely cleft in the rocks, and shook her head. 'I can't, Joyce. I'm too beat. I'm so used up. Julieta says she'll talk to the medicine man about them. Maybe he knows some ceremony that'll lay them to rest. But not me. I'm shot.'
They nodded understandingly. But Ed still looked a little downcast: Again, he'd missed the chance to probe the ghost with his instruments. Measuring the electrical activity in Tommy's brain while possessed would have constituted a tremendous advance in parapsychology, mapping the neurological mechanism of possession and quite possibly providing information that would be instructive in other psychiatric maladies. But he'd never had the chance to use the FMEEG. And his inspection of the school's electrical system in pursuit of clues about the flicker phenomenon had produced nothing. Ed sat on the dirt, absentmindedly picking tufts of sage leaf, crushing them between his fingers, sniffing the pungent herb, tossing the crumbs away.
Cree smiled, hoping she could cheer him up. She had saved something for him.
'Ed. I have to tell you about a phenomenon I noticed up at the sheep camp. No electricity up there, right? Just Coleman lanterns, firelight, starlight. So guess what?'
'What?' He looked at her suspiciously from beneath one raised eyebrow.
'We had flicker! When Tommy was in full swing, the light appeared to strobe, quite noticeably-natural light, Ed! Kerosene lamps! Meaning it's an optical or neurological phenomenon. Not necessarily electrical!'
'No kidding!' Ed visibly perked up, his eyes changing as the implications hooked him.
'Nope.'
'Which would argue for direct neural stimulus. Jeez, that is good!' He edged over and put his arm around Cree's shoulder. He squeezed her hard, looking at Joyce. 'She's a sweetie, isn't she? Making me feel better.' He screwed off the top of his water bottle and raised it in a toast: 'To DNS! The future of parapsychology.'
They laughed, toasted, then quickly got serious as Julieta and Joseph emerged from the ravine. The two little figures slowly made their way back.
Joyce tipped her head back to observe them thoughtfully. 'Think they'll make it?'
Cree looked at them. 'I think they already have. I think these two've paid their dues in advance, the good stuff starts now. Like they say: Love will find a way.'
'Sometimes it just takes a while,' Ed added, getting distant again.
51
