'Yes,' I said. 'Love This-side is part of The Love, isn't it?' 'A candle lighted from the sun,' I said. 'But the candle will go out!' she cried. 'Oh, Gramma! The candle will go out in the winds of the Crossing!' She turned her face from me and whispered, 'Especially if it never quite got lighted.' 'There are other candles,' I murmured, knowing how like a lie it must sound to her. 'But never the same!' She snatched herself away from my side. 'It isn't fair! It isn't fair!' and she streaked away across the frost-scorched meadow. And as she left, I caught a delightful, laughing picture of two youngsters racing across a little lake, reeling and spinning as the waves under their feet lifted and swirled, wrapping white lace around their slender brown ankles. Everything was blue and silver and laughter and fun. I was caught up in the wonder and pleasure until I suddenly realized that it wasn't my memory at all. Thann and I had another little lake we loved more. I had seen someone else's Happy Place that would dissolve like mine with the Home. Poor Lytha. The crooked sun was melting the latest snow the day all of us Old Ones met beside the towering shells of the ships. Each Old One was wrapped against the chilly wind. No personal shields today. The need for power was greater for the task ahead than for comfort. Above us, the huge bright curved squares of metal, clasped each to each with the old joinings, composed the shining length of each ship. Almost I could have cried to see the scarred earth beneath them-the trampledness that would never green again, the scars that would never heal. I blinked up the brightness of the nearest ship, up to the milky sky, and blinked away from its strangeness. 'The time is short,' said the Oldest. 'A week.' 'A week.' The sigh went through the Group. 'Tonight the ship loads must be decided upon. Tomorrow the inside machines must be finished. The next day, the fuel.' The Oldest shivered and wrapped himself in his scarlet mantle. 'The fuel that we put so completely out of our minds after the Peace. Its potential for evil was more than its service to us. But it is there. It is still there.' He shivered again and turned to me. 'Tell us again,' he said. 'We must complete the shells.' And I told them again, without words, only with the shaping of thought to thought. Then the company of Old Ones lifted slowly above the first ship, clasping hands in a circle like a group of dancing children and, leaning forward into the circle, thought the thought I had shaped for them. For a long time there was only the thin fluting of the cold wind past the point of the ship and then the whole shell of metal quivered and dulled and became fluid. For the span of three heartbeats it remained so and then it hardened again, complete, smooth, seamless, one cohesive whole from tip to base, broken only by the round ports at intervals along its length. In succession the other five ships were made whole, but the intervals between the ships grew longer and grayer as the strength drained from us, and, before we were finished, the sun had gone behind a cloud and we were all shadows leaning above shadows, fluttering like shadows. The weakness caught me as we finished the last one. David received me as I drifted down, helpless, and folded on myself. He laid me on the brittle grass and sat panting beside me, his head drooping. I lay as though I had become fluid and knew that something more than the fatigue of the task we had just finished had drained me. 'But I have to be strong!' I said desperately, knowing weakness had no destiny among the stars. I stared up at the gray sky while a tear drew a cold finger from the corner of my eye to my ear. 'We're just not used to using the Power,' said David softly. 'I know, I know,' I said, knowing that he did not know. I closed my eyes and felt the whisper of falling snow upon my face, each palm-sized flake melting into a tear. Lytha stared from me to David, her eyes wide and incredulous; 'But you knew, Father! I told you! I told you Gathering Night?' 'I'm sorry, Lytha,' said David. 'There was no other way to do it. Ships fell by lot and Timmy's family and ours will be in different ships.' 'Then let me go to his ship or let him come to mine!' she cried, her cheeks flushing and paling. 'Families must remain together,' I said, my heart breaking for her. 'Each ship leaves the Home with the assumption that it is alone. If you went in the other ship, we might never all be together again.' 'But Timmy and I-we might someday be a family! We might-' Lytha's voice broke. She pressed the backs of her hands against her cheeks and paused. Then she went on quietly. 'I would go with Timmy, even so.' 'Chell and David exchanged distressed glances. 'There's not room for even one of you to change your place. The loads are computed, the arrangements finished,' I said, feeling as though I were slapping Lytha. 'And besides,' said 'Chell, taking Lytha's hands, 'it isn't as though you and Timmy were loves. You have only started two-ing. Oh, Lytha, it was such a short time ago that you had your Happy Day. Don't rush so into growing up!' 'And if I told you Timmy is my love!' cried Lytha. 'Can you tell us so in truth, Lytha?' said 'Chell, 'and say that Timmy feels that you are his love?' Lytha's eyes dropped. 'Not for sure,' she whispered. 'But in time-' She threw back her head impetuously, light swirling across her dark hair. 'It isn't fair! We haven't had time!' she cried. 'Why did all this have to happen now? Why not later? Or sooner?' she faltered, 'before we started two-ing! If we have to part now, we might never know-or live our lives without a love because he is really-I am-' She turned and ran from the room, her face hidden. I sighed and eased myself up from the chair. 'I'm old, David,' I said. 'I ache with age. Things like this weary me beyond any resting.' It was something after midnight the next night that I felt Neil call to me. The urgency of his call hurried me into my robe and out of the door, quietly, not to rouse the house. 'Eva-lee.' His greeting hands on my shoulders were cold through my robe and the unfamiliar chilly wind whipped my hems around my bare ankles. 'Is Lytha home?' 'Lytha?' The unexpectedness of the question snatched the last web of sleepiness out of my mind. 'Of course. Why?' 'I don't think she is,' said Neil. 'Timmy's gone with all our camping gear and I think she's gone with him.' My mind flashed back into the house, Questing. Before my hurried feet could get there, I knew Lytha was gone. But I had to touch the undented pillow and lift the smooth spread before I could convince myself. Back in the garden that flickered black and gold as swollen clouds raced across the distorted full moon, Neil and I exchanged concerned looks. 'Where could they have gone?' he asked. 'Poor kids. I've already Quested the whole neighborhood and I sent Rosh up to the hillplace to get something-he thought. He brought it back but said nothing about the kids.' I could see the tightening of the muscles in his jaws as he tilted his chin in the old familiar way, peering at me in the moonlight. 'Did Timmy say anything to you about-about anything?' I stumbled. 'Nothing-the only thing that could remotely-well, you know both of them were upset about being in different ships and Timmy-well, he got all worked up and said he didn't believe anything was going to happen to the Home, that it was only a late spring and he thought we were silly to go rushing off into Space-' 'Lytha's words Timmyized,' I said. 'We've got to find them.' 'Carla's frantic.' Neil shuffled his feet and put his hands into his pockets, hunching his shoulders as the wind freshened. 'If only we had some idea. If we don't find them tonight we'll have to alert the Group tomorrow. Timmy'd never live down the humiliation-' 'I know-'Touch a teener-touch a tender spot.'' I quoted absently, my mind chewing on something long forgotten or hardly noticed. 'Clearance,' I murmured. And Neil closed his mouth on whatever he was going to say as I waited patiently for the vague drifting and isolated flashes in my mind to reproduce the thought I sought. –Like white lace around their bare brown ankles 'I have it,' I said. 'At least I have an idea. Go tell Carla I've gone for them. Tell her not to worry.' 'Blessings,' said Neil, his hands quick and heavy on my shoulders. 'You and Thann have always been our cloak against the wind, our hand up the hill-' And he was gone toward Tangle-meadows and Carla.
