Closed System

a small, hurt way. The old man was chuckling, enjoying the de­manding work, building ever more complex andcomplete

models. Pat glanced at the screen andsaw a solid glow, a mass of millions of stars, in themodel now, so

closely packed as to be indistin­guishable from the overall mass of brightness. 'I could get very serious about you,' he whis­pered, and felt a small shock, realizing that eventhough he'd made a statement which, on the sur­ face, was not binding, he'd made a commitment.

Pat, my boy, he told himself, you've gone and done it. You're in love with this one. 'Pat, listen to me,' she said. 'I'm not sure I want to. I don't think I want to hear what you're going to say.' 'I can't. I just can't. I can't have that complica­tion in my life right now. Please understand.' 'Give me somethingto understand.' 'I want to go to bed with you,' she said, notlooking at him. 'That's what I want.' 'But not like this. Not so casually, just as if wehave to because we're alone, lost in space, time onour

hands.' 'What better time?' 'When you're sure. When we're back home onZede II.' 'I'm sure.' 'Pat, there's time.' 'I have a preliminary three-point identification,'the old man said, in his slightly mechanical voice. 'Great timing,' Pat said.

Corinne looked at him inquiringly.

'It'll take a few minutes for him to cross-check,'Pat said. 'Then we'll be going home?' 'Yes.' She came to him, lifting herself high on tiptoes,kissed him quickly. 'Pat, let's talk when we'reback home.' 'Yeah, OK,' Pat said. 'I know when I'm beingrejected.' 'No. You're not being rejected. Please. I enjoyevery minute with you, Pat. I think I'm falling inlove with

you, but I must be sure.' She turned away. 'Please understand. I've never made a com­mitment, not with anyone.'

He felt his heart race. He wanted to believe.

'I don't want to commit under these emotionalcircumstances, relief at our escape from death,being alone, lost in space. Humor me?'

'Do I have a choice?'

She turned to face him. 'Yes. I'll give you thechoice. After all, I'm indebted to you. If you want—'

Oh, hell, he thought. That tore it. Now she wastelling him she'd sleep with him out of gratitude.

A small bell rang and the computerlitup greenwith pride. 'Position location,' he said. 'Positionlocation.'

'I hear you,' Pat said. He took Corinne's handsin his. 'OK, the old man has found us and we can be off for Zede II. I'm going to play it your way.You said you think you are falling in love with me.OK. I think I'm falling in love with you. I won'tpush. I'll just pester you night and day when we'reback on Zede II until we're both sure.'

'Deal,' she said. 'Let's drink to it.'

He punched up her favorite, a mild, tasty fruitthing developed by a bartender whose mother musthave been frightened by a fruit wagon. He hadTigian brandy. As he handed Corinne her glass sheseemed to stumble, and the contents of the glassspilled onto the deck. He grabbed for a towel, bentto clean up the spill, then drew her another as sheapologized for her clumsiness. He killed his brandyin two gulps, wondering why the damned com­puter had to pickthis time to be efficient andquick.

He checked the charge in the blink generator. Full. Ran a security check of theSkimmer. Allsystems were perfect. He made the rounds. Thegenerator room was prickly with charge, causinghis hair to want to stand up, the huge generatorgiving out a sense of being almost alive.

He stumbled going back to the bridge, felt anodd sensation at the base of his skull, shook hishead to dispel a feeling of dizziness. The computerhad pinpointed the nearest blink route and hadthe coordinates for a beacon at the ready.

'Off we go,' he said as the ship blinked and thefeeling of sliding merged with the dizziness in hishead and blackness rushed at him from a far, glar­ing horizon to enfold him. A battle line of war­ships rushed out of the darkness, cannon blazing,and he tried to yell a warning, his hand reachingfor the fire-control helmet as

he fell.

There were times when he felt as if he existed ina vacuum, all blankness and darkness and not onefeature for the eyes, ears, touch to discover, andthen wild, frightful, nightmarish things came at him from all directions with deadly intent as hetried to scream and run in a medium which clung,held back, swallowed. Once or twice he felt warmth,soft hands on his forehead. He saw Corinne as sheappeared in the film, in period costume, and shewas alternately welcoming him and rejecting him.And there were strange suns with square planetspeopled by the monsters of his childhood night­mares and sweet fields of wild flowers scentedwith Corinne's perfume, and once a big, ancient derelict of a starship alone in black space with thenearby star fields close and glowing.

Corinne, in his fevered, tossing delirium, leanedover him, whispering his name as she held a cupof soup to his lips.

'Corinne?' he croaked, having to struggle tofind enough voice to say that one word.

'It's all right,' she said. 'Drink this.'

'Corinne?'

'Yes, I'm here.'

'What—happened?'

'Ah,' she said, and her hand on his foreheadwas very, very real. 'I do think you're back withus.'

'Sick?'

'Very,' she said. 'You've been very, very ill. Ithink you must have picked up mindheat fever on Taratwo.'

'Gggggg,' he said, trying to say something thathe forgot as blackness came again.

The next time he came alive he stayed awake longer. She fed him chunky things with a spoon,and he

chewed, not being able to taste, but know­ing he needed food.

'How long?' he croaked.

'Five days.'

'That long?'

'It's rarely fatal, but sometimes the victim wishesit was.'

'Where—'

'You passed out as we blinked onto the routethe computer discovered. We're standing by theblink

beacon.'

'Got to get—' He tried to raise himself and fell back weakly. It was two more days before he couldget

out of bed and totter, a thousand years old, tothe bridge. The computer had the route workedout. He

took the ship through five blinks before hehad to go back to bed to rest.

Corinne nursed him lovingly. She forced him toeat, to drink liquids. Gradually, as he guided theship back onto more heavily traveled blink routes,each jump putting them closer and closer to Zede II, he began to get his strength back. He wouldn'thave to worry about exercise. He'd lost fifteenpounds.

They orbited Zede II, and he checked into Con­trol. There was a wait of one hour for Zede City Space Port.

'There is one thing,' Corinne said.

'There are a lot of things,' he said. 'I'll need aplace to stay, near you, so that I can see youoften.'

'The diamond,' she said.

'What about it?'

'If you don't object, I'll keep it in my possession.'

He loved her. But he was the trader. He knewthat the best place to market that hunk of glorywas on Xanthos, richest of the planets, center ofthe UP. The museums of the UP would vie witheach other, bidding against private interests.'I canget a better price,' he said.

'All right,' she said.

'I'll find a place to stay. I'll need your addressand number.'

She wrote on a note pad, tore off the sheet,handed it to him. Zede Control plugged intoSkim­ mer's

computer, and the old man gave a warning.'Here we go down,' Pat said. 'When can I seeyou?'

'Call me tomorrow.' It was morning, Zede City time.

'Why not tonight?'

'I'll have to report in,' she said. 'Bring thebrass up to date on my tour of Taratwo.'