In her mind Gwen tried to assess her escape route. Her instincts told her to make a mad dash. What was she waiting for? Why did she dare try and talk sense into him? Was that even possible? The last time she had been in a room with a madman, Eric Pratt had attempted to drive a freshly sharpened lead pencil into her throat.
This was different. There was no uniformed officer right outside the door ready to come running to her rescue. R. J. Tully wouldn't be racing in to protect her either. Not this time. She'd never make it to the door let alone the hallway or the elevator without Campion overpowering her. Her only available weapon was talk. She needed to control him with her voice and her words. She glanced around the room one more time in search of anything else. No, there wasn't anything else. At least not until she settled him down. Maybe then she had a chance of catching him off guard.
James Campion's rage came in bursts then quieted almost as quickly. He stood between Gwen and the doorway, quiet now but glaring at her with a new distrust that she was attempting to dismantle. She had to convince him she was on his side, that she wasn't the enemy.
'I'm on your side, James. Father Paul Conley abused you in a way no boy should experience. He deserved to be punished,' she said, stopping herself from adding that ripping his head off and placing it on his own altar may have been a bit much. She needed to win his trust. He needed to believe she understood. 'He won't be able to hurt any more boys ever again.'
'That's right,' he said, nodding. 'Playing the game and pretending to kill him wasn't enough. It didn't stop him.'
'But, James, what about the others?'
'The others? The other priests?'
'No, the young women. There were four of them, weren't there? Tell me about them. Why did you hurt them?'
'Oh, you mean the whores.'
'Excuse me?'
'I met them over the Internet. We talked, got to know each other. You told me that I needed to try to have normal relationships with women. Remember? You told me.' He was getting anxious again.
'Yes, that's right. I did tell you that.' And she had.
It had been a major concern to him that he couldn't have an ordinary relationship with a woman. She remembered their conversations. She knew his abuse had left him with an immature attitude about sex. He always seemed anxious and concerned about it but never angry. He had talked about it all so calmly. How he wanted to take it slow and get to know and trust a woman before it turned to sex. It was the sex that seemed to worry him, to almost frighten him. Of course it did. It all made sense to her now even before he started to explain.
'We would talk on the Internet. It was comfortable, enjoyable.' Campion's eyes were somewhere else as if remembering. This was good. Get his mind on something else so she would be able to catch him off guard.
'You could get to know each other,' Gwen encouraged him, 'without the pressure of going out on a date.'
'That's right. It was nice,' he said, almost like a teenage boy. 'We would talk about computer games and movies and stuff in the news. But then they would want to meet me.' His forehead creased with worry and his jaw became so taut she could see he was clenching his teeth. 'That would have been okay, too, except that they always wanted to… go somewhere. To be alone with me. And by alone they always meant… you know,' and he looked to her for help.
'They wanted to be more intimate with you?'
'They wanted sex,' he hissed at her and his whole face seemed to turn a shade darker.
What was wrong with her? She was making him angry again, when she needed to keep him calm. She needed to make him believe she was on his side. That she agreed with him. He needed to consider her an ally. And yet there was one question that could not go unanswered.
'What about Dena?'
'Who?' He looked at her as though she had awakened him.
'Dena Wayne. My assistant?' Could she still pretend to be on his side if he called Dena a whore?
'I thought she'd be different. She was actually nice to me. I liked her a lot. We went out and had fun. We talked. But then, no matter how much I thought J wanted it… I kept seeing
'I… I didn't recognize it,' Gwen said and her insides felt as if liquid ice had just been injected into her. He had meant for it to be a call to stop him and she hadn't even recognized the earring as Dena's.
Campion didn't seem to hear her and continued, 'The notes and even a map _ I sent you all of it. I thought you'd help me. But you didn't. You couldn't help me.'
She had backed up against her desk and her hands reached behind her, feeling, searching for anything to use as a weapon since it was becoming obvious that her words, that her voice was not enough. But she had just slid anything and everything into her leather briefcase moments before he arrived. It sat on the chair next to the desk.
'I can help you, James,' she lied, not having a clue what to even offer. 'We can go over everything.' She reached for her briefcase as if there was something in it that could help.
'No, goddamn it!'
His voice slammed her back against her desk again as if he had struck her with his fist, and Gwen pulled the briefcase to her chest like a shield, wrapping her arms around it tightly. It was closed, damn it. The locks snapped shut, making it impossible for her to just slip a hand inside.
'No, you can't,' he said. 'But I can.' He pulled out a small revolver from his pocket. He held it out and pointed it directly at her.
Her heart hammered at her rib cage. Almost instantly, her breathing came in labored gasps. And her palms were slick with sweat.
'James, where did you get a gun?' It hadn't been more than a whisper and still it had been an effort. It was too late to worry about showing fear. But how could he have a gun? None of his victims had been shot. Racine had said strangled. But then how would they know for sure? All the torsos were missing. 'James, put the gun down.' If she said please would it matter? If she screamed would anyone hear her?
'This feels good,' Campion said, waving it around. 'This… this can help. I bought it a few days ago. I wanted to use this with Father Paul, but I couldn't figure out a way to get it on the plane.' He was smiling now. And calm. Way too calm. His hand didn't shake in the least as he held it stretched out in front of him. 'It feels so good. Better than any of our sessions. Makes me feel strong. Yes, I wanted to see the fear in his eyes. But I got something better. I got to hear his last breath. His very last breath as I strangled the life out of that bastard.'
Then he stopped and looked as if he was listening for something. Gwen listened, too, hoping it had been the elevator. Maybe it was someone in the hall. She couldn't hear a thing over the pounding of her heart in her ears.
He tilted his head, still listening, and then he smiled again. 'The banging. It's gone.'
Of course it was gone she wanted to tell him. It was inside her now.
'You shouldn't have made me dredge up all those memories, Dr. Patterson,' he said, shaking his head.
She couldn't believe it. He was really going to do this. She couldn't swallow and it hurt to breathe. Her knees threatened to go out from under her. If she fell would he shoot her where she lay? Even his eyes __ though they stayed on hers __ they had gone somewhere far away. Should she make a run for it? What did she have to lose? Getting shot in the back or between the eyes, what did it matter?
'You didn't fix it,' Campion said and Gwen couldn't help thinking how much he sounded like an executioner,
'James, you don't want to do this,' she said, but, again, he didn't seem to hear her.
'I forgive you,' he told her and then he pulled the trigger.
The pain seemed to blossom, spreading throughout her body. She didn't even remember falling, but from the
