The dirt lane leading to Earl’s shanty was a river of mud. Carl decided not to chance it. Instead, we parked the truck and got out. Barbed wire indicated the property line. An old, weather-beaten fence post had a homemade sign nailed to it that said:THIS IS PRIVAT PROPTERYKEEP OUT!! THAT MEANS YOUTRESSPASSERS WILL BE SHOT ON SITE
Earl was never much for spelling or grammar. Wasn’t much for social skills, either. I remember about ten years ago, when he suddenly decided to get himself some religion. Rose used to teach Bible study every Thursday night at the church, and Earl started showing up, sitting in the back and glowering at everyone. Most of us just ignored him, but Rose was delighted. She viewed him as another one of God’s lost lambs coming in from the cold and made it her personal mission to tell Earl Harper the good news of Christ’s sacrifice.
One night, we were talking about love and how the Bible commands us to love everybody and offer each a chance to worship the Lord. Earl, who hadn’t said a word for weeks, stood up and declared, “I’ll tell you folks something. There’s three types of people in this world that I won’t love. The first is the queers. The second is the niggers. And the third is the Jews.” Then he sat back down again, having said his piece.
Apparently, he realized that his contribution to the dialogue might have ruffled some feathers, because the next week, he showed up again and clarified his statement. “I reckon I should explain myself a little better. I got to thinking about it this week, and I guess I don’t believe that we should forbid folks from coming to church. But maybe we could have a pink row of pews in the back, and the queers could sit there. Then we could have a row in front of that one, painted black, for the niggers. And one painted green for the Jews, since they love money. I reckon that would be okay, and that way, I wouldn’t have to sit with them if I didn’t want to.”
After that, we asked Earl not to come to Bible study anymore. He didn’t take that very well. See, while you might be chuckling at his ignorance, or shaking your head, Earl had been serious. He really thought his recommendations would be acceptable.
But now I’ve gone and started rambling again. I’m wearing this pencil down to a nub (I keep sharpening it with my pocketknife) and we’re not even halfway done yet. And the pain is getting worse.
Anyway, Carl and I stood there on Earl’s property, staring at that hand-lettered sign. Splotches of the white fungus I’d seen in the hollow grew on the trees along the lane. Carl reached out with his finger.
“Don’t touch that stuff,” I warned. “You don’t want to get it on your skin.”
“What is it?”
“I’m not sure, but I saw it growing on a deer this morning. Can’t imagine it’s too healthy.”
Carl shuddered. “No, I don’t reckon it is. Hope it’s not airborne.”
We turned away from the fungus and stared up at Earl’s shack.
“I still don’t think this is such a good idea,” Carl whispered.
I didn’t reply. I was thinking about that bloodstain on Dave and Nancy’s wall, and the weird slime that had covered everything.
And about missing houses and buildings swallowed up by the earth.
And about what I’d seen happen to the bird earlier in the morning.
I shivered, and it had nothing to do with the cold or dampness in the air.
We trudged through the mud towards Earl’s shack. The clearing was deathly still. Even the rain seemed to fall without sound. We were about halfway there when an explosion split the air. At first, I thought it was thunder. Then Earl Harper shouted, “Stop right there, you two, or I’ll blow your goddamn heads off!”
He emerged from the trees, dressed in combat fatigues and a floppy-brimmed rain hat and pointed a twelve- gauge shotgun at us. Smoke still drifted from the barrel. He was soaked, and I wondered how long he’d been outside.
“Howdy, Earl,” I tried. “Let’s just settle down now. We don’t mean you no harm.”
He glanced at the rifle in Carl’s shaking hands and motioned with the shotgun.
“If you don’t mean no harm, Teddy Garnett, then turn right around and head back the way you come.”
“We just wanted to see how you’re holding up,” Carl explained, carefully pointing his rifle away from Earl. “Ain’t no call to shoot at us, Earl.”
“And there ain’t no fucking call to be trespassing on my property, neither, Carl Seaton.” Earl’s eyes were wide, and his wet face seemed to shine. “You’ve seen me, and seen that I’m all right. Now get on out of here!”
“Listen now, Earl,” I said, fighting to keep my voice calm. “We’re fixing to leave in just a second. But I need to ask you something important first.”
“What?” He kept the weapon pointed at me, and his expression was suspicious.
I stared down the barrel of his gun, and felt my nuts tighten. “Have you seen or heard from Dave and Nancy Simmons within the past few days?”
“No. I ain’t seen them. Not that I’d want to anyway. Why?”
“We just stopped by their place. It looked like there might have been a struggle. I’m worried about them, and just wondered if you might have heard anything.”
His eyes narrowed and his grip tightened on the shotgun.
“You accusing me of something, Garnett?”
“Not at all. Just worried about them is all, and you’re their closest neighbor.”
“I ain’t seen nothing of them, but I’ll tell you this. Whatever happened to them will happen to you fellas too. You just wait and see.”
Carl frowned, and the rifle twitched in his hands. “What are you talking about?”
“There are things in the ground, turning under our feet, crawling through the maze beneath the earth. I hear them at night. They speak to me, and tell me things.”
I froze. Carl shot me a wary look.
“I—I think maybe I’ve seen them too,” I said. “What are they, Earl? Do you know?”
“Maybe I do and maybe I don’t.” He smiled. “But I ain’t interested in discussing it with you, Garnett. Reckon you’ll find out soon enough. Now you two get out of here. I mean it!” He jacked the shotgun.
Carl and I kept our eyes on him and slowly backed away. I stepped in a puddle and cold water soaked though my sock.
Earl began to laugh. “You look like a pair of drowned rats!”
“Nice seeing you again, Earl,” Carl muttered. “Take care now!”
“You boys think it will rain today?” Earl called.
Carl leaned towards me and whispered, “I told you so. He’s crazier than a copperhead in a mulberry bush on a hot day in July.”
I nodded. “I already said you were right. Let’s go.”
But Earl wasn’t finished. “Y’all thought I was senile. Crazy! Talking about me, whispering behind my back down at the Ponderosa and your precious church functions. But you’ll see. Here’s the proof! I warned you about the government’s HARP project. Weather control. Heard about it on the radio. Tried telling you, but you just fucking laughed, didn’t you? Well, I guess I’m the one laughing now, ain’t I?”
“You take care, Earl.” I waved. “We’ll be heading on home now.”
He fired another shot into the air and ejected the shell. It landed in a rain puddle. Wisps of lazy smoke curled from the barrel.
“I see either of you skulking around here again and I’ll blow your fucking heads clean off your damn shoulders. Ain’t nobody gonna take what’s mine, goddamn it!”
Carl pointed his rifle up into the air and held his free hand out, the palm facing Earl. “You don’t have to worry about that. Not that there’s anything here worth taking anyway.”
Earl scowled. “What’s that supposed to mean, Seaton?”
“Meditate on it for a bit, why don’t you. You’re a bright one. I reckon you’ll figure it out.”
“Carl,” I hissed. “Quit antagonizing him. Let’s just get out of here.”
“Don’t you come back, either,” Earl warned. He faded into the trees like a ghost, but we could feel his eyes on us, watching as we trudged down the lane.
We made it back to the truck in one piece and climbed inside. The heater warmed us while we got our pounding pulses under control. Then Carl pulled away as fast as he could, spinning the tires and spraying mud and gravel all over Earl’s homemade sign.
“Well, the rain certainly hasn’t helped his disposition, now has it?” I joked.
