Magic's Promise

than his birth-mother ever could be. 'It's nothing,' he replied. 'At least nothing a little sleep won't cure. Come on, you know how you feel at the end of a tour of duty. You're still your old tactful self, Savil.'

'Tact never was one of my strong traits, lad,' she replied, and he felt her hand touch, and then begin stroking his hair. He closed his eyes and relaxed; muscles began to unknot that must have been tensed up for the past year. For the first time in months there was no one depending on him, looking to him for safety. It was nice to feel sheltered and protected, instead of being the shelter and protection. There are times when I'd give anything to be a child again, and this is perilous close to one of them.

'I am mortally tired, Savil,' he admitted, finally. 'I need this leave. It won't take long to rest up - but I do need the rest. You know, I didn't ask for this. I didn't want to be a Herald-Mage, I wanted to be a Bard. I sure as Havens didn't ask to be 'Vanyel Dragonsbreath,' or whatever it is they're calling me.'

'Demonsbane.'

The increasingly shrill tone of his own voice finally penetrated his fog. 'Savil, I - am I whining?'

She chuckled throatily. 'You're whining, son.'

'Hellfire,' he said. 'I swear, every time I lose a little sleep, I turn fifteen. A bratty fifteen, at that. I'm amazed you put up with me.'

'Darling boy,' she said, her hand somehow stroking his headache away, 'You've earned a little whine. You're thinned out in more ways than one.' She sighed. 'That's the one thing I regret most about the past few years - you never do or say anything anymore without thinking about it. That's good for Herald-Mage Vanyel, but I'm not entirely certain about Vanyel Ashkevron.' There was a long silence behind him, then - 'There's no joy in you anymore, ke'chara. No joy at all. And that bothers me more than the circled eyes and thin cheeks.'

'We've all endured too much the last five years to be able to afford to do things without thinking. As for joy - is there joy anywhere, anymore? We've all lost so much - so many friends gone - '

Another long silence. 'I don't know.'

He cleared his throat, and changed the subject. 'I didn't feel a third here. You aren't teaching?'

'Can't; don't have the stamina anymore. Not and be Guardian, too.'

He'd half expected that. And he half expected what quarter. 'So they made you Guardian? In whose place?'

'Lancir's. Shavri can't; she tried, and she can't. The four Guardians have to be Herald-Mages. We'd hoped Healing-Gift was close enough, but she didn't pass the last trial. I think she's relieved. It's a pity; the Guardian of the East has always been King's Own, but - '

'In that case, the present I brought you may be handy.' He shifted so that he could get at his pocket, and pulled out the crystal. He closed his hand around it, feeling all the smooth planes and angles pressing into his palm. 'Don't you need a Prime Focus stone of your own to set in the Web? I thought you didn't have a good Prime to use for anything but personal stuff.''

'You do, and I put a stone there, but it was a Secondary Focus, an amethyst, and not what I'd have-'

He raised the hand holding the crystal above his head, parting his fingers so she could see it, but not opening his eyes or moving his head.

'Sunsinger's Glory!' she breathed. 'Where did you find that?'

'Gifted me,' he said, as the weight left his hand. 'People keep giving me things, Savil. An opal or amber I could have used - still - you can use it, so do.'

'I shall.' Her hand began to stroke his hair again, and he heard the little click as she set the stone down on the table beside her. 'That will make my job a bit easier.' She chuckled richly. 'I thought I was so lucky when it turned out my resonances worked best with rose-quartz-not like Deedre who was stuck with topaz, or Justen, with ruby. Nice, cheap stone, I thought. Won't have to go bankrupt trying to get a good one. Little did I know how hard it was to find a good, unflawed, large crystal!'

'Little did you know you were going to turn out a Guardian,' he replied drowsily.

'Hmm, true.' Her mind touched softly on his. Vanyel, ke'chara, you are not well. There's more silver in this lovely black hair.:

He couldn't lie mind-to-mind, not to her, so he temporized. :The silver's from working with the nodes; you should know that. As for the rest - I'm just weary, teacher - love. Just weary. Too many hours fighting too many battles, and all of it too much alone.: