'Because - ' he faltered for a moment, losing his courage as he was forced to actually say what he was. Or rather, was not, anymore. ' - because my body belongs to Falconsbane, and any moments that I live I must steal from him.'
She raised an eyebrow, as if she did not find this to be so terrible. 'Oh, so? And I suppose you feel very sorry for yourself, eh? You feel the fates have mistreated you?'
He shook his head. 'Yes. No. I mean - '
'Ha. You don't even know your own mind.' She lifted her lip in a faint sneer and narrowed her gaze. 'Well, this fellow here has told me all about you, and I'll tell you what I think. I could feel sorry for you, but I won't. I've known too many people with hard lives or harder deaths to feel sorry for you. And what's more, if you indulge yourself in self-pity, I'm gone! I don't waste my time on people who spend all their time pitying themselves and not doing anything. You want out of this situation, boy, you help make it happen!'
The words stung, but not with the crack of a whip, or as salt in a wound, but rather as a brisk tap to awaken him. He lifted his chin and straightened his back. For all the harshness of her words, there was a kindliness in her tone that made him think she really did feel sorry for him, and would help him the best way she knew how.
And she was right; was Nyara's lot not much harder than his own? And any of Falconsbane's victims had perished in pain that surely exceeded anything that had happened to him! 'Yes, Wise One,' he said, forthrightly. 'Tre'valen has already explained all this to me. If I am to take my body and my life back, I must earn the aid to do so. I was a coward, Wise One, but not a fool. Or rather, I was a fool before, but I am no longer one, I hope.'
She snorted, but the smile was back and the sneer was gone. 'Piff. A brave man is simply someone who doesn't let his cowardice and fear stop him. Hellfires, boy, we're all cowards at some time or another. Me, I was afraid of deep water. Never did learn to swim.'
He had to smile at that. Oh, this was a crusty old woman, but she had a good heart, and a keen mind that must make her a kind of shaman among her own people. And she did want to help him, he knew it now as well as he knew his own predicament. Somehow her will to help him made him more confident than the Avatars' promises. They were otherworldly and uncanny, but she was as earthy and real as a good loaf of bread. As the Shin'a'in proverb went, 'It is easier to believe in grain than spirits.'
'I should rather think that the water would fear you, Wise One, and part to let you pass,' he said, greatly daring but feeling she would like the attempt at a joke.
She did; she laughed, throwing her head back and braying like a donkey. 'All right, Tre'valen, you were right, he'll do. He'll do.'
She turned serious, all in a moment. 'Now listen, boy. You remember those people Falconsbane wanted to get his claws into so much? The daughter, the girl in white, the Hawkbrother boy? The ones Tre'valen told you were going to be coming this way to do something about Ancar and Falconsbane?'
He nodded. Nyara he knew too well. The girl of the white spirit-steed was one that Falconsbane had coveted, and had never even touched. The Hawkbrother - Darkwind, he remembered - was the son of Starblade, the Hawkbrother mage Falconsbane had gleefully corrupted.
He winced away from the memories that name called up, and not just because they were unpleasant, but because there had been moments of pleasure there, too. Falconsbane was an Adept at combining pleasure and pain, as well as an Adept mage. And he had taken pleasure in the pain, and used the pleasure to cause pain. That was what made An'desha so uncomfortable with those memories . . . that was what felt so...unclean. Falconsbane knew so much - and to use what he knew in the way he did - that made him all the worse, for he could have used it to such good ends had he wished. The Avatars did, and this woman had power. And the others -
'Well, those three are coming. To Hardorn, here. They are on the way right this very moment. They intend to get Ancar and Hulda - and Falconsbane; eliminate them completely, before Ancar can destroy Valdemar. What we - you, me, and the Avatars - want to do is see if they can't get Falconsbane without getting you. Do you understand what I'm saying?' She cocked her head to one side and regarded him carefully.
'Somehow we have to find a way to kill Falconsbane without killing my body, so I can have it back.' He shook his head, feeling a sudden sinking of spirits. Put baldly, he could not see how they could manage this. 'I am no mage, Wise One, but that seems an impossible task,' he faltered.
She snorted. 'Hellfires, boy, I've seen less likely than that come to pass in my time. Improbable, maybe. What's impossible is how he has managed to flit from body to body, down all these years,' she countered. 'We don't know how he's done it. If you can find that out for me, we have a chance.'
His spirits soared again. She had a point! Falconsbane had to have a way for his spirit to remain intact down all the centuries. And she was clearly a mage, so perhaps once she knew how the Adept had done this, perhaps she could see a way to force him out again.
He nodded with excitement, and she smiled. 'Right,' she said. 'Now, there are actually five people coming in on this, and three of 'em are Adepts, so among all of us, I think we have a pretty good chance of coming up with an answer for you. Say - ' she added as an afterthought. 'You want to see what they look like right now? I tell you, it's worth seeing, you will not believe what they're doing.'
'Oh - yes, please,' he replied, eagerly. Tre'valen had shown him these people once, but he was starved for
