There was a little disappointment at learning they would not simply invoke a power and banish Falconsbane, but far more simple relief. He was not alone at least, he had not been forgotten! He nearly wept with the intensity of his emotion.
But like lightning, his relief turned to bewilderment. What, exactly, was this Tre'valen? He didn't look anything like one of the Swordsworn...could he be spirit-traveling in some way, and was his real body somewhere nearby? If An'desha had a real, physical ally somewhere, it would be more than he had hoped for. A physical ally could free him from Ancar. But on the other hand, wouldn't someone who was leshy'a be better suited to free him from Falconsbane?
:What are you?: he asked timidly :Are you a spirit?:
Tre'valen smiled ruefully :I am not precisely a spirit-but I am not precisely 'alive,' either. I was, and am still, a shaman of Tale'sedrin. I do not believe that the term 'Avatar' would mean anything to you - :
An'desha dared not shake his head, but evidently Tre'valen 'read' the intention.
:We are 'Avatars,' for what that is worth. We serve Her a little more directly than the Kal'enedral do. We go where She cannot and where the Kal'enedral are unsuited. As now, when a shaman is needed, and not a warrior :
A shaman? He couldn't help himself; he had gotten into this mess by trying to escape the shaman. He shrank back a little, both afraid of Tre'valen's censure, and ashamed. Surely, since She knew so much, She knew of his foolish attempt to flee, and her - Avatar - knew it, too.
Tre'valen sensed his shame, and Sent him a feeling of reassurance :An'desha, you need not fear me because of your past. Would She have sent us to you if She thought you deserved punishment? Would She punish you because you chose to flee instead of being forced into a role you didn't want?:
A good point. He breathed a little easier.
:And think on it, An'desha. She takes no one who is not willing - Kal'enedral or shaman. She also punishes only those who have betrayed that which they promised. Why should She be angered at you because you were not willing?:
Now he felt twice as stupid. All this could have been avoided if only he had thought before he acted.
Tre'valen shook his head :An'desha, I learned to think long before I acted - and when I was young, that broody thoughtfulness became inactivity. I was shocked out of it in my own way, even as you have been shocked. I became what I am now because of a moment when I did not have time to consider hundreds of options. I believe the choice I made was the right one. And perhaps, so was yours.:
Now he was confused. And what on earth did Tre'valen mean by saying that he was not precisely a spirit, but not precisely alive?
Oh, it didn't matter. What mattered was that he had been forgiven. Tre'valen seemed to be able to follow that thought, for he nodded.
:You were not thinking, An'desha, to run off like that. A better choice would have been to go to another shaman, one of some other Clan, who would have been more objective about you and your life-path. But you were also very young, and being young and stupid is not supposed to open one up to consequences quite as serious as you suffered. We all learn. That is why we live.:Tre'valen smiled a little and the woman- form behind him took on more substance. And to An'desha's surprise, it was not one of the Kal'enedral as he had suspected it might be, nor was it even another Shin'a'in. Instead, the woman matched all the descriptions of the Tale'edras that he had ever heard! She was very beautiful, and it was clear to An'desha that these two were bound by more than similarity of form and purpose.
:This is Dawnfire,: Tre'valen said, confirming his guess by giving the woman a Hawkbrother name :She and I are your friends and your helpers. You know what you want most - :
:My body!: he cried involuntarily :My freedom!:
:We can free you of your body - permanently, but I suspect that is not your first choice,: Dawnfire replied wryly.
No. For all that he had wished for oblivion and death before, he truly did not want it now.
:In that case, you will have to earn your body and your freedom,: Tre'valen told him. The mist-forms glowed, like dust in a sunbeam, sparkling and dancing :And even if you do all that we ask, there is no guarantee that we can grant what you want. We will do our best, but we are very limited in power. There are many other forces at work here.:
But it was a chance; it was more than he had ever had before. Even a chance was worth fighting for, and especially a chance for freedom.
Both of the spirits nodded encouragingly :An'desha, what we want from you is relatively simple.
