'Amen.' It was Leonard back from the bathroom.
'You look refreshed,' I said. 'Hope you struck some matches.'
'About four. It was a championship shit.'
'I can see this isn't going anywhere,' Chub said. 'So I think I'll withdraw until we're willing to converse sensibly.'
'Telling it like we see it,' Leonard said. 'Isn't that what you like, Chubby?'
'I don't need this,' Chub said. He got up and went through the hallway door.
'I hate it when he leaves the room,' Leonard said. 'He makes things so damn bright when he's around. But since he's gone, I'm going outside to smoke.'
'Thanks for not cluttering up the air,' Howard said, and he looked at Paco.
Paco put a smile on his ugly face and kept smoking.
Leonard said, 'It's not your air I'm worried about. It's mine. This place has a rot smell under all that fucking incense. Smelled enough of that in Vietnam. The rot and the incense.'
Leonard went outside.
'Think I'll join him,' Paco said, and he got up and went out and closed the door.
'Me too,' I said, and got up and started after Paco.
'Hap,' Trudy said. 'We got to talk.'
God had spoken. 'Do we?' I said.
'I told you you shouldn't have done this,' Howard said to Trudy.
'You don't know everything,' Trudy said, and stood up.
'I know this,' Howard said. 'I know this isn't a good idea at all. You're thinking maybe with some other part of your body.'
'That's rich, coming from you,' Trudy said. 'I've seen how you think.'
'How you make me think.'
'Children,' I said. 'Let's not fight.'
Howard stood up, held his beer in my direction. 'I got something to say to you, big shot.'
'Say it, then,' I said. 'While I'm used to the drone of your voice. I'd rather not get acclimated again.'
'You think you can come in here and run things,' he said, 'be a goddamn comedian. But you're wrong.'
'I'm not trying to run anything. I just don't want to be ran.'
'We got some scruples here. Idealism may strike you as dumb, or sissy, or childish, or nostalgic, but there's more to it than that. There's more to us than that.'
'I'm sure history will be kind to you,' I said. 'Howard gave his stolen money to the whales. He was a good guy. Hap gave his to wine and heat and women. He was a bad guy. Leonard bought all the Hank Williams originals he could find. He was a bad guy.'
'What's with the whales?' Howard said. 'No one's said a thing about any whales.'
'Shut up,' Trudy said. 'You're drunk.'
'Only had a beer,' he said.
'The smell of rubbing alcohol makes you silly,' she said.
'Look, Howard,' I said, 'I'm not trying to cause any trouble here. You think maybe I'm trying to take Trudy —'
'She's her own person,' Howard said.
'Yeah, but you don't like the fact that I've been fucking her again, do you?'
'Hap,' Trudy said. 'Don't.'
'You know I have,' I said. 'You think she came over to my place and merely talked some business? We banged each other till our eyes bugged out.'
'Like Howard said, Hap, he doesn't own me. And neither do you.'
'And I'm damn proud of it,' I said.
What Howard thought he knew, he was now certain he knew. In theory it was okay, but in actuality it got under his skin like a chigger.
'It doesn't matter,' Howard said, but his voice lacked conviction. 'She's a grown woman. I've got no strings on her.'
'But she's got them on you,' I said. 'And I should know. They used to go all the way through me and fasten to the bones. I got maybe a few still tied in me. Enough that I'm acting horsey here when I shouldn't, and it's making you do the same.'
'I'm saying you're not coming in here and changing what we believe, what we're going to do. That's all. I'm not saying anything about me and Trudy or you and Trudy.'
'I think you're saying plenty about just that. You open your mouth and your heart and dick talk over you. Like I
