‘Her pants didn’t look prison issue to me.’
‘Honey, these days they don’t wear kit with little arrows over it.’
‘Naff off, will you?’
They were perched on tall stools by the front window watching the people walk by. The pedestrianised North Street in Chichester, stiff with shoppers, was a far cry from Selsey beach last Sunday morning. ‘The way you tell it,’ Gemma said, ‘you don’t seem to have panicked. If it had been me, I’d have run a three minute mile, screaming all the way.’
‘Strangely enough, I didn’t feel anything at the time,’ Jo said. ‘I mean, I didn’t trip over her, or anything. If I had, I might have screamed. I noticed something large and pale under the seaweed and walked over to where she was and that was it.’
‘I’ve never seen a dead body.’
‘That was my first. There isn’t much to it.’ She gave Gemma a faint smile. ‘If you’re going to murder your boss like you said the other day you’ll have to face up to it.’
‘Won’t be so scary if I’m expecting it. What I wouldn’t like is finding one I didn’t know was there, like you did. They’re always doing that in films.’
‘The people who make films are out to shock you, aren’t they? The quick burst of music and the sudden close-up? Real life isn’t like that.’
‘Real death.’
‘All right. Real death. It’s not the big deal we’re all led to believe. Don’t worry, Gem. When the time comes, you’ll be fine, just fine.’
‘I’m going to need someone like you to keep the heeby-jeebies at bay.’
‘I’m not sure I want to be party to a murder.’
‘A brilliant undiscovered murder.’
‘If you insist.’ She smiled and sipped her coffee. ‘You know, if they served this in smaller mugs, everyone would drink it quicker and the place wouldn’t get so crowded.’
‘It’s their marketing strategy. You bet they’ve worked it out. There are good commercial reasons for large mugs, but don’t ask me what they are.’
A tall, good-looking guy in a suit paused outside the shop and appeared ready to come in, then changed his mind and walked on.
‘Did we do that?’ Jo asked.
‘We were the reason he stopped in the first place,’ Gemma said. ‘He’ll be back.’
‘You wish.’ They weren’t teenagers. They were in their thirties. Jo had been thinking for some time it would be no bad thing if they started behaving like grown-ups.
But Gemma wasn’t of the same mind. ‘Did you see the size of his feet?’
‘No. Should I have? Why?’
Gemma shook with laughter. ‘If you don’t know by now, I’m not going to tell you.’
‘Oh, that.’ Jo sniffed. ‘It’s a myth.’
Gemma spooned some of the froth from her coffee and licked it. ‘Mind if I ask something personal?’
‘Ask away. If it’s off limits I’ll tell you.’
‘You and your squeeze. Have you known him long?’
‘Rick, you mean? Not very. Why?’
‘Doesn’t matter.’
They watched more people cross their vision. In her mind Jo was running through the reasons for Gemma’s question. Could it be the solution to the dilemma she’d been facing all week?
‘You want to know if I’m serious about him? As it happens, I’m not. He’s just someone I’ve been out with a couple of times. We don’t have much in common, as you probably noticed last weekend. Was he coming on to you in the cinema?’
‘A bit.’
‘What a prick.’
‘Don’t get me wrong,’ Gemma said, and she was actually blushing. ‘It wouldn’t have bothered me normally.’
‘How embarrassing. It crossed my mind when he mentioned the headache. His excuse to cover up what had been going on, was it?’
‘To be fair it was only a problem because I thought you and he were, like… you know. I let him know he was out of order.’
‘What did you do-mark the back of his hand with your fingernails? I would have.’
‘I just told him to leave off.’
‘Bastard.’
A customer looking for a place to sit caught the full force of Jo’s annoyance and slopped coffee over his tray.
Gemma said, ‘Oops.’
Jo ignored the guy. ‘Him, not you. I’m not saying just because I’ve been out with him a couple of times he’s got to be totally loyal to me, but you are my friend and it was the first time he’d met you. That entitles you to some respect.’ She gave a sharp, angry sigh. ‘That’s Rick and me finished. I wasn’t that keen on him anyway.’
Gemma said after a pause, ‘Are you sure about that?’
‘You heard me, Gem. He’s just a bad memory now.’
‘Then you wouldn’t curse me and my progeny for a thousand years if I went out with him?’
Jo, tiptoeing as lightly as Gemma, said, ‘But what about Jake? Isn’t he your boyfriend?’
‘Jake?’ Gemma squeaked at the suggestion. ‘God, no. Don’t run away with that idea. He’s only a customer-at the printer’s, where I work. We’re doing some Christmas cards for the wildlife thing he’s part of, and he said he’d seen me at the bowling. When he asked me to play some ends with him I thought it was naughty talk, but it wasn’t. The guy’s got the sense of humour of a wombat. I felt sorry for him, so I went as an act of charity. He hasn’t a clue how to chat up a girl.’
‘He got a result with you.’
‘Get away.’ She laughed. ‘A game of ten-pin. Call that a result? Not where I was brought up, ducky. If you want the truth I was trying to think of ways of unloading him on someone else when we met last week and you were the unlucky one who copped him.’
‘So you won’t be seeing him again?’
‘The son of Frankenstein? You’re joking. I’ve done my bit for customer relations.’ She clapped her hand to her mouth. ‘You don’t actually fancy him, do you? Omigawd, Gemma puts her foot in it again.’
‘I didn’t say I fancy him,’ Jo said-which was true. She hadn’t said anything about him. She hoped she looked indifferent. ‘He was okay with me. I’ve nothing against him.’
‘Me neither,’ Gemma said, ‘but you wouldn’t want to wake up in the morning and find that face next to you on the pillow. Know what I mean?’
‘His looks don’t bother me.’
Gemma gave her a nudge. ‘I think you do fancy him on the quiet. A bit of Rocky Horror, eh?’
‘I wouldn’t call him that.’
‘Nor would I-to his face. Well, you have a clear run as far as I’m concerned.’
‘Oh, thanks,’ Jo said, and tried to make it sound ironic.
‘Got any plans for tonight?’
‘Nothing definite.’
‘Not for publication?’
‘Yet to be decided.’
‘He hangs out at the bowling place most Saturdays, I heard. Play your cards right and you could even get to see the penguins again.’
Jo screwed up her paper napkin and threw it at Gemma.
‘I was going to give you the latest goss on Mr Cartwright,’ Gemma said. ‘Don’t know if I will now.’
‘Goss on the boss? Go on. It had better be good.’
‘Well, he’s started chatting up this woman in accounts called Fiona. She’s a good twenty years younger,
