Swing, Swing Together

ghastly mock-Gothic structures in red brick, I was told. There was quite a stampede in that direction after the celibacy rule for Fellows was lifted in seventy-seven. Things are settling down again now, as I predicted they would at the time. It was a very outmoded rule-a relic of popery, I suspect-and got the younger dons into some embarrassing extra-mural entanglements, not to go into the intra-mural consequences. Bonner-Hill joined us a year or two after the rule was lifted and he was married and moved out within a year. Mrs. Bonner-Hill was one of the prettiest women in Oxford, but she wasn’t right for him. An actress-and I don’t imply anything to her discredit in that-she is moderately well known in the dramatic world-but her experiences on the boards had ill-prepared her for marriage to a medieval historian.”

“Are there children?” Cribb asked.

“No. That may have contributed to their estrangement. She was isolated in North Oxford-told me so herself at the Vice-Chancellor’s garden party-and missed the theatre dreadfully. She tried to persuade him to let her continue with her acting after marriage, but it was out of the question.”

“Why was that, sir?”

“It would have made his life insufferable in the Senior Common Room. People fasten onto such things. They did, as a matter of fact, shortly after he moved back into rooms here last Michaelmas and she went back on the stage. Some precocious undergraduate recognized her in Forget Me Not at a repertory theatre in Henley. She was using another name, but he was fairly sure of her identity and a few sharp questions at the stage door confirmed it. Next time Bonner-Hill appeared for a lecture he found a bunch of forget-me-nots stuffed into the water glass. Every undergraduate in the front row was wearing one in his buttonhole. You may imagine his difficulty after that in introducing a lecture on feudalism.”

“Even so,” said Cribb, “I would have thought a man could live a thing like that down.”

“Admittedly, but Bonner-Hill’s temperament was not well-suited to living things down. He took himself seriously, cultivated refinement in conduct and appearance and hated to be ridiculed. The episode upset him profoundly, the more so, I think, because it was rumoured about the same time that the lady had formed an alliance with an actor. No reference was made to it in Merton-not in his presence, anyway-but he seemed to sense that we all knew about it-and of course we did, for news travels fast in Oxford-and for a week or more he declined to join in any conversation at table.”

“Was he unpopular among the Fellows?”

“He was on tolerably good terms with everyone. Fernandez was his closest confidant, but even he found himself cold-shouldered at the time. More recently, however, they were on close terms again.”

“I should like to meet Mr. Fernandez. Bonner-Hill had no enemies in the College, you think?”

“I am sure of it.”

“He was murdered, sir.”

“Then you must look outside Merton, Sergeant. First let us see if Fernandez is in his rooms.”

He answered their knock after a delay so long that they were on the point of going away. He had a towel draped over his head and his moustache was glistening with damp. “It’s you, Warden! My word, I do apologize. I had my head over a basin. I was inhaling friar’s balsam, the only remedy I ever found effective for a sore throat.”

“I’m sorry to hear you are indisposed, Fernandez.”

“The crisis is past, Warden, I am confident of that.”

“Are you well enough to spare us a few moments? This is Sergeant Cribb of the police-”

“Police?” Fernandez repeated the word with distaste.

“Investigating the death of poor Bonner-Hill,” the Warden went on.

Fernandez nodded. “Rest his soul, yes. Do come in, gentlemen.”

Cribb turned to the Warden. “I don’t think I need detain you any longer, sir. Mr. Fernandez can tell me everything else, I’m sure. I’d like to see Mr. Bonner-Hill’s rooms before I go, but I’ll speak to the porter about that. Thank you for your time, sir.”

Fernandez, with the towel still draped over his head like a Bedouin, led Cribb into a sitting room with a window overlooking the Fellows’ Quadrangle. One wall was lined to the ceiling with books. The others presented an odd juxtaposition of religious paintings, antique maps and photographs of actresses. Cribb crossed to the window and looked out. “Finish your inhaling, sir. It’s got to be done while the stuff is still hot.”

“I am fully cognizant of that, thank you. I have inhaled sufficiently for now.” From the tone Fernandez used, he must have detected patronage in Cribb’s offer. Unexceptional in height, but broadly built, with hands like a stevedore’s, he was not the sort to provoke. “Pray enlighten me as to how I can be of assistance to the police.”

Cribb had picked up a tiny twist of scarlet feathers from the windowsill. “Fly-fishing. Is that a pastime of yours, sir?”

“Pastime?” Fernandez screwed his face into the expression it had formed when the Warden had mentioned police. “I do not indulge in pastimes, Sergeant. Fly-fishing is a sport. Yes, as you so cleverly deduce, I have taken a few fish with the fly in times past. Of late I have favoured live bait. I fish for pike, although what this has to do with poor-”

“Pike, sir? The large ones. Are there many to be had in Oxford?”

“Sufficient for good sport. The record catch from one of the backwaters weighed twenty-nine pounds. That is no small fish, Sergeant. I nurse a small ambition to take a pike that weighs thirty pounds or more. For some two years I have devoted most of my Saturdays to this quest. I have several times seen one not far from here, a very large one, but it would not take the strike. They are devious adversaries.”

“I understand Mr. Bonner-Hill used to accompany you in your hunt for pike.”

Fernandez held up a finger dramatically. “Now I see the drift of your interrogation! Ah, the subtlety of the detective police! We have got to Bonner-Hill. Yes, Sergeant, he joined my Saturday expeditions two months ago. He was a novice with the rod, but prepared to learn.”

“He was on the river this morning.”

“The morning is a favourable time,” said Fernandez. “I should have been with him myself but for this abominable laryngitis.”

“After his body was taken from the water, we found his punt in Bulstake Stream. His fishing tackle was still aboard.”

“Had he caught anything? I suppose not. Trolling is an art not easily acquired. Bonner-Hill scarcely knew one end of the rod from the other, for all his enthusiasm. Would you care for a sherry?”

“He was murdered, sir,” said Cribb, determined not to be deflected. “Why should anyone choose to murder Mr. Bonner-Hill?”

Fernandez held open his hands. “It is enough for me to fathom the behaviour of a simple fish. I suggest you put your question to somebody who professes to know something about the intricacies of the human mind. In Oxford there are experts upon everything.”

“You saw a powerful lot of Mr. Bonner-Hill, though,” Cribb said in justification.

“No, Sergeant. Kindly do not jump to conclusions. I saw more of Bonner-Hill than others in Merton, but I did not see a powerful lot of him, as you so graphically assert. I am a man with many responsibilities, which often take me away from Oxford for days on end. I frequently visit the Royal Geographical Society in London. I am a member, you understand, and I have the honour to serve on more than one of the committees. If a meeting lasts until the evening, I stay overnight at my club, the Oxford and Cambridge. It would be quite misleading to suggest that Bonner-Hill and I were often in each other’s company. When it was possible, we went fishing together on Saturday mornings, and that was the extent of it.”

“Did he talk to you about his troubles, sir?”

“Troubles?”

“Matrimonial. I understand he left his wife a year ago and moved back into Merton. Have you met Mrs. Bonner-Hill?”

“The murderess? I’ve met her, yes.”

“Did you say ‘murderess’?”

Fernandez smiled. “A frivolous remark, Sergeant. It was Bonner-Hill’s term for her-only, of course, in a jesting sense. She is an actress, you know-very good in romantic comedy. At some point in her career she was persuaded to try a more demanding role. The local newspaper commented that if she and the actor playing Macbeth had