at.'
What a disaster this was! The essay had not been intended for the general public and especially not for his father. 'It's a long article, Papa. Didn't you read it, sir? I explain a scientific theory in it….'
His father stared at him with an impatient, glinting look. 'Is this what they claim is science nowadays?' al- Sayyid Ahmad asked himself. 'God's curse on science and scientists.'
'What do you say about this theory? I noticed some strange phrases that seem to imply that man is descended from animals, or something along those lines. Is this true?'
Kamal had recently struggled violently with his soul, his beliefs, and his Lord, exhausting his spirit and body. Today he had to contend with his father. In the first battle he had felt tortured and feverish, but this time he was even more frightened and alarmed. God might delay punishment, but his father's practice was to mete out retribution immediately.
'That's what the theory states.'
Al-Sayyid Ahmad's voice rose as he asked in dismay, 'And Adam, the father of mankind, whom God created from clay, blowing His spirit into him what does this scientific theory say about him?'
Kamal had repeatedly asked himself this same question, finding it just as dismaying as his father did. The night he had worried about it, he had not been able to get any sleep. He had thrashed about in bed wondering about Adam, the Creator, and the Qur'an. If he had said it once he had said ten times: 'Either the Qur'an is totally true, or it's not the Qur'an'. Now he thought, 'You're attacking me because you don't know how I've suffered. If I hadn't already grown accustomed to torture, I would have died that night.'
In a faint voice he replied, 'Darwin, the author of this theory, did not mention our master Adam….'
The man yelled angrily, 'Then Darwin's certainly an atheist trapped by Satan's snares. If man's origin was an ape or any other animal, Adam was not the father of mankind. This is nothing but blatant atheism. It's an outrageous attack on the exalted status of God. I know Coptic Christians and Jews in the Goldsmiths Bazaar. They believe in Adam. All religions believe in Adam. What sect does this Darwin belong to? He's an atheist, his words are blasphemous, and reporting his theory's a reckless act. Tell me: Is he one of your professors at the college?'
'How ridiculous this comment would seem if my heart were free to laugh,' Kamal mused. 'But it's crammed with the pains of disappointed love, doubt, and dying belief. The dreadful encounter of religion and science has scorched you. But how can an intelligent person set his mind against science?'
In a humble voice, Kamal said, 'Darwin was an English scientist who lived a long time ago.'
At this point, the mother's voice piped up shakily: 'God's curse on all the English.'
They turned to look at her briefly and found that she had put down her needle and the clothes in order to follow their conversation. They soon forgot her, and the father said, 'Tell me: Do you study this theory in school?'
Kaiml grabbed for this safety rope suddenly thrown to him. Hiding behind a lie, he said, 'Yes.'
'That's strange! Will you eventually teach this theory to your pupils?'
'Certainly not! I'll teach literature, and there's no connection between that and scientific theories.'
Al-Sayyid Ahmad struck his hands together. At that moment he wished he had as much control over science as he did over his family. He yelled furiously, 'Then why do they teach it to you? Is the goal to turn you into atheists?'
Kamd protested, 'God forbid that it should have any influence on our religious beliefs.'
His father studied him suspiciously and said, 'But your essay spreads atheism.'
Kama! replied gingerly, 'I ask God's forgiveness. I'm explaining the theory so the reader will be familiar with it, not so he'll believe it. It's out of the question that an atheistic notion should influence the heart of a Believer.'
'Couldn't you find some other subject besides this criminal theory to write about?'
Why had he written this article? He had hesitated a long time before sending it to the journal. He must have wanted to announce the demise of his religious beliefs. His faith had held firm over the past two years even when buffeted by gales coming from two of the great poets and skeptics of Islam: Abu al-Ala al-Ma'arri and Umar al- Khayyam. But then science's iron fist had destroyed it once and for all.
'At least I'm not an atheist,' Kamal told himself. 'I still believe in God. But religion? … Where's religion? … It's gone! I lost it, just as I lost the head of the holy martyr al-Husayn when I was told it's not in his tomb in Cairo… and I've lost A'ida and my self-confidence too.'
Then in a sorrowful voice he said, 'Maybe I made a mistake. My excuse is that I was studying the theory.'
'That's no excuse. You must correct your error.'
What a good man his father was wanting to get Kamal to attack science in order to defend a legend. He really had suffered a lot, but he would not open his heart again to legends and superstitions now that he had cleansed it of them.
'I've experienced enough torment and deception,' Kamal reflected. 'From now on I won't be taken in by fantasies. Light's light. Our father Adam! He wasn't my father. Let my father be an ape, if that's what truth wants. It's better than being one of countless descendants of Adam. If I really were descended from a prophet like Adam, reality wouldn't have made such a fool of me.'
'How can I correct my error?'
Al-Sayyid Ahmad said with equal measures of simplicity and sharpness, 'You can rely on a fact that's beyond doubt: God created Adam from dust, and Adam's the father of mankind. This fact is mentioned in the Qur'an. Just explain the erroneous aspects of the theory. That'll be easy for you. If it isn't, what's the use of your education?'
Here the mother's voice said, 'What could be easier than showing the error of someone who contradicts the word of God the Merciful? Tell this English atheist that Adam was the father of mankind. Your grandfather was blessed by knowing the Book of God by heart. It's up to you to follow his example. I'm delighted that you wish to be a scholar like him.'
Al-Sayyid Ahmad's displeasure was apparent in his expression. He scolded her, 'What do you understand about the Book of God or scholarship? Spare us his grandfather and pay attention to what you're doing.'
She said shyly, 'Sir, I want him to be a scholar like his grandfather, illuminating the world with God's light.'
Her husband shouted angrily, 'And here he's begun to spread darkness.'
The woman replied apprehensively, 'God forbid, sir. Perhaps you didn't understand.'
Al-Sayyid Ahmad glared at her harshly. He had relaxed his grip on them, and what had been the result? Here was Kamal disseminating the theory that man's origin was an ape. Amina was arguing with him and suggesting he did not understand. He yelled at his wife, 'Let me speak! Don't interrupt me. Don't interfere in things you can't comprehend. Pay attention to your work. May God strike you down.'
Turning to Kamal with a frowning face, he said, 'Tell me: Will you do what I said?'
'You're living with a censor who's more relentless than any afflicting free thought elsewhere in the world,' Kamal told himself 'But you love him as much as you fear him. Your heart will never allow you to harm him. Swallow the pain, for you've chosen a life of disputation.'
'How can I answer this theory? If I limit my debate to citing Qur'an references, I won't be adding anything new. Everyone knows them as well as I do and believes them. To discuss it scientifically is a matter for specialists in that area.'
'So why did you write about something outside your area?'
Taken at face value, this objection was valid. Unfortunately Kamal lacked the courage to tell his father that he believed in the theory as scientific truth and for this reason had felt he could rely on it to create a general philosophy for existence reaching far beyond science. Al-Sayyid Ahmad considered his silence an admission of error and so felt even more resentful and sad. To be misled on a topic like this was an extremely grave matter with serious consequences, but it was a field where al-Sayyid Ahmad co aid exercise no authority. He felt that his hands were as tied with this young freethinker as they had been previously with Yasin when he had escaped from paternal custody. Was he to share the experience of other fathers in these strange times? He had heard incredible things about the younger generation. Some schoolboys were smoking. Others openly questioned their teachers' integrity. Still others had rebelled against their fathers. His own prestige had not been diminished, but what had his long history of resolute and stern guidance achieved? Yasin was stumbling and practically doomed. Here was Kamal
