Behind Closed Doors

in my face! And I'm not the one who's pushing. You’re the one who's pushing me. You never stop. Move, please. Right now. I can't breathe.”

He shifted his weight off, and propped his head on his elbow. “But it turns you on when I push,” he pointed out. “I feel what makes you hot, and I follow what I feel. That's how I make you come. By pushing you to the place that you need to go.”

It was hard to frame the elusive thought into words with his eyes boring into her face, scattering her wits. “But it drives me nuts!”

“I love driving you nuts.” He lowered his face to kiss her.

She shoved him away. “I mean nuts in a bad way, not in a good way! I've never hit anyone in my entire life, Seth! I'm a total creampuff pacifist, and you—you made me hit you!”

He studied her face for a long moment with a keen, assessing look. “That is such bullshit,” he said finally.

She blinked at him, bewildered.

“Don't give me that confused, innocent look. Your cream-puff act is just a mask. I can see right through it. I see right into you, Raine.”

“Do you?” She squirmed beneath him, restless. “What do you see?”

“Something shining. Beautiful and strong and wild. It pulls on me, makes me ache and burn. Makes me want to howl at the moon.”

His heated words licked at her like flames. Her body relaxed with one last shuddering sign, and she gave in and twined around him, pliant and soft. “Don't push so hard,” she pleaded.

“Stop resisting,” he coaxed, his lips nuzzling, nipping at her throat. “I could take you so incredibly far if you'd just let yourself go. Let me drive, Raine. I swear, I know where I'm going.”

She let out a choked burst of breathless laughter. “How can I trust you if you don't trust me? Look at us, Seth.” She gestured at his body, still pinning her flat “I only weigh about a hundred and twenty pounds, and you —”

“No, you weigh less. Your fridge has nothing but mustard and a couple of wrinkled apples in it. Do you ever eat, or what?”

His critical tone grated on her nerves. “The contents of my refrigerator are nobody's business,” she snapped. “My point is, you don't have to pin me down. Fm not quick enough to run away from you, even if I wanted to.”

“You don't want to?”

She opened her mouth, and closed it, unwilling to give him another opening. Simple honesty won out. She didn't have the presence of mind to tell him anything but the naked truth.

“No. I don't want to run away from you,” she said quietly. “I want you to let go of my wrist. I want you to let me breathe.”

The manacle of his strong fingers slowly relaxed. “I don't want to get hit again,” he warned.

“I promise, I won't,” she assured him.

He pulled her onto her side so they were lying on the floor facing each other, and studied her face as if she were a puzzle he were trying to solve. “I'm sorry I broke into your house “ he said, in a stiff, formal tone. “I'm sorry I scared you.”

She put her hand to his face, caressing the place where she had struck him. “I appreciate the apology.” She echoed his formal tone.

“I did it because I was worried about you,” he added, frowning.

That broke the spell. Raine laughed in his face. “Don't ruin a good apology by justifying bad behavior.”

His cautious smile faded quickly. “Does this mean that Fm your boyfriend, then? Officially?”

Another blind leap. She didn't know what those words meant to him, coming out of the alien landscape of his mind, but something hot and soft was moving in her heart. She couldn't draw back. She could see in his eyes how badly he wanted the strange, awkward declaration.

Don't cling to an illusion of control, Victor had said. For once, she agreed with him. It was time to give her heart a chance to run the show. Things couldn't possibly get any crazier than they already were.

“OK,” she said gently. “You're my boyfriend, if you want to be.”

He let out a long, slow sigh, and hooked his leg over hers,

pulling her closer so that the whole length of her body was touching him. “I want to be. God. Do I ever want to be.”

“All right, then.” She petted his tense jaw with a soothing hand and smiled at him. “You are. It's official. You can relax.”

Seth arranged her hair between their faces, right next to his nose, so he could stroke it and smell it. “I know I come on too strong,” he said, his voice hesitant. “It's a really weird time in my life.”

“Do you want to talk about it?” she invited gently.

“No.” His tone was like a gate clanging shut in her face. She flinched away, feeling thrown back on herself.

He pulled her back against him, cursing softly. “I'm sorry, Raine. I can't talk about it. I'm intense, yeah, but I'm not dangerous.”

“No?” She turned her face away, avoiding his kiss.

“No. Not to you.” He caught her face in his hands and insisted on the kiss, his thumbs tenderly stroking her cheek. She savored the hot, delicious flavor of his mouth, the intimate thrust of his tongue.

What Seth said was untrue. She would give anything for this passionate, ravishing tenderness from him—and that made him deadly dangerous to her.

He lifted his head, smoothing her hair off her forehead. “I got you a cell phone today.”

That was so unexpected, she could think of nothing to say.

“You'll send me cute little text messages now?” he prompted.

She closed her gaping mouth. “Is that what you want?”

“That's what I want.” There was a touch of embarrassed defiance in his tone. “I'm your official boyfriend now, and I want all the perks that go with the job. You cool with that?”

“Um, yes,” she murmured.

He cupped her head in his big hand and kissed her again, but the kiss had changed There was a soft, pleading sweetness to it, as if he were silently begging her for something which she could not help but give him. Something that would break her heart to withhold.

He pulled away and stared into her face, his eyes troubled.

“What's the matter?”

“I'm nervous,” he said bluntly. “I don't know much about the steady relationship thing. I feel like a bull in a china shop.”

She laughed softly and stroked the deep little frowning groove between his eyebrows “Just be nice. Be gentle.”

“It's not the sex I'm worried about,” he snapped. “And I've always been gentle with you.”

“Just because you don't leave bruises doesn't mean you're gentle. Conan the Conqueror.”

He stroked her hair, smoothing it all the way out to the tips. “Hey. Give me a break. I want you bad. You're so fucking beautiful, I just want to carry you off to my beastly lair and make love to you forever. On my bearskin rug.”

She touched his face with her fingertips and stared into his eyes, speechless. She could feel him gathering his seductive powers, weaving a spell to make her helpless with desire. He grabbed her hand, pressing hot kisses against her palm, and rubbed her knuckles against his cheek. “You're not throwing that Conan the Conqueror crack in my face again,” he said. “This time you'll tell me how much you want me. I want to hear you ask for it, pretty please.”

She drew back anxiously. “That sounds like another power game “ she said. “Seth, I don't—”

“Shhhh.” He placed a finger over her lips. “No, not at all. You've got me wrong. I just want to show you something about yourself. Something beautiful. You'll like it.” He explored her trembling lower lip with his finger, staring at her with hot, fascinated eyes.

A bold impulse flashed through her. She drew his fingertip into her mouth and suckled it. He jerked as if an