Zombies and Shit

“That’s how you say hello?” Mr. T yells at her. “Let the T-2000 show you the proper way to greet somebody.”

Mr. T charges her. His steel feet crush the asphalt beneath him, rumbling the earth with every step he takes. As he runs, his legs move faster and faster. He holds out his fist into a cannonball flying directly for her head. But once he arrives, Nemesis flips into the air and lands on the other side of him. His fist crashes into the building, knocking another section of wall into the street. He turns around and charges her again.

As the T-2000 stomps toward her, she comes at him. In a flash, she zips across the pavement, too fast for Junko and the others to see. The blade of her sword passes over Mr. T’s fist and hits him in the neck.

Mr. T looks down at the blade below his chin. It didn’t cut him, frozen in place. He isn’t sure why she stopped herself. She could have sliced his head from his metal body right there.

Then Mr. T sees the merc punk standing in the distance, over Nemesis’ shoulder. Vine has his arm elevated, pointed at the reptilian woman, his wire wrapped around her sword.

Then Mr. T gives her a big smile, as the merc punk pulls back on the wire, ripping the sword from the woman’s hands. The sword flies over Vine’s head, landing on the far side of the parking lot.

With his other hand, Vine launches his second wire, swiping it toward both of the two contestants. Mr. T leaps twenty feet up to dodge the wire as it slices through the air. Nemesis just stands in place. Without moving her feet, she bends her waist all the way back, in a perfect L-shape, as the wire passes over her. Then she flips out of the way, as Mr. T comes back to the earth fist-first. His metal knuckles cause a crater to open up in the asphalt beneath him. When he looks up, he sees the horde of zombies closing in on them.

“Get to the roof,” Mr. T yells at Junko. “I’ll handle these two.”

Junko doesn’t hesitate. She grabs Scavy, Rainbow, and the lawn gnome, and races toward the building.

Going through the crumbling hospital, Junko, Scavy, and Rainbow Cat make their way up to the roof. They go for the two-way radio.

“We have to call for the helicopter,” Junko says.

She walks carefully along the edge of the roof to the two-way radio. A section of the roof had collapsed when the car crashed into the side of the building. The ground could fall out on her at any moment as she works her way to the communication device.

“We’re here,” Junko says into the radio. “Come pick us up.”

Rainbow Cat looks out over the roof as the parking lot fills with the living dead. They surround the building on all sides, a sea of molten flesh. As a camera ball hovers over Junko’s shoulder, a voice comes on the other side of the radio.

“We can only pick up one of you,” says the voice.

“I know that,” she says. “Just come pick one of us up.”

“Wait right there,” says the voice. “The remote helicopter will be there in ten minutes to pick one of you up.”

“Hurry up!” Junko cries.

She tosses the radio to her feet and returns to the others. Scavy is on the other side of the roof, examining a dead body.

“Who is it?” Rainbow asks, as they gather around him.

“That Haroon guy,” Junko says. “It looks like the strange woman killed him.”

Scavy bends down and picks up the solar-powered shotgun.

“What’s that?” Junko asks.

“Some kind of homemade shotgun,” he says.

“Let me use it,” Rainbow says.

Scavy shakes his head. “It’s mine now.”

Rainbow gives him a dirty look as they move to the helicopter pad.

“Okay,” Junko says. “We have ten minutes to hold up here. Hopefully the gnome has enough juice in it to keep them back that long.”

Peering over the roof, they can already see dozens of the undead entering the hospital from every entrance.

“They don’t know we’re on the roof,” Junko says. “With luck the helicopter will get here before they find us.”

Scavy nods, then looks up into the air. From above, they see Oro circling the rooftop in his flying machine.

As the zombies engulf Nemesis, Vine, and the T-2000, they no longer have space to fight each other, and turn their efforts toward the living dead.

Vine spins in a circle, both wires shooting out at maximum length, and cuts down thirty zombies. Sixty severed legs stand on the ground surrounding him, like freshly mowed blades of grass.

Metal spikes rotate on Mr. T’s body, as he shreds and punches his way through the horde. He picks up a zombie by the leg and swings it around like a bat, clubbing the undead out of his way as he moves closer to his opponents.

Nemesis doesn’t bother with the walking corpses. They ignore her, passing her by as if she’s one of them. She retrieves her double-bladed sword, and ducks down into the crowd, like a snake waiting for its chance to strike.

From his glider-cycle, high in the gray cloudy sky, Oro looks down at the contestants on the rooftop.

“Those simpletons will not be victorious over me,” Oro says. “My genius is almighty. My genius is supreme.”

He aims the rocket launcher at them.

“My genius is absolute!”

Then he fires.

The trio on the roof scatter as the rocket comes toward the helicopter pad. The explosion knocks them off of their feet and blows another section of the roof away.

Scavy rolls over and aims his sniper rifle at the aircraft.

“That was a cheap shot,” Scavy says, as he looks into the scope.

He fires and blows a hole in Oro’s wing the size of a quarter. Scavy fires again, then again. As he hears the bullets tearing into the wings of his glider-cycle, Oro pedals it away from the rooftop, circling back toward the city.

“Shit,” Junko says, helping Rainbow Cat to her feet. “That explosion is going to lead the entire horde up here.”

Scavy switches from sniper to shotgun.

“Prepare yourself,” Junko says.

In the small section of roof that remains, they go back-to-back.

Popcorn and Gogo drive into the parking lot of the hospital, staring at the massive horde of the living dead surrounding the building. When the car can no longer move within the mob of zombies, Gogo opens the door and jumps out.

“Hey!” Popcorn yells. “Where are you going!”

“Brains!” Gogo yells, pushing her way through the crowd. “I’m going to eat their fucking brains!”

“No!” Popcorn yells. “Get back here!”

Popcorn jumps out of the smart-car and chases after her zombie friend, but she quickly loses her in the mob.

“If she hurts Scavy,” Popcorn says, “I’m going to cut off her fucking head.”

Then she continues on, toward the hospital.

Nemesis goes for Vine. As the merc punk cuts down a row of undead, leaving himself open, she tosses her