Fall of Icarus

“It’s a long story,” Yen sighed. “But I’m really here looking for you. Is this where you’re staying?”

Keryn frowned as she appeared to collect her thoughts. “I can’t talk about this right now. Whatever we need to talk about, we can do it when we’re back on board the Revolution.”

Yen arched an eyebrow. Keryn seemed closed off and hesitant, a far cry from the reunion he had expected after finding her on the space station. He took a step closer, but she took a step away. “I don’t think the Revolution is the right place to say what I need to say.”

“You need to leave, Yen,” Keryn said slightly angrily. “This is neither the time nor the place for the conversation that I want to have with you.”

Yen could feel his own anger rising. “What has gotten into you?”

“I…” she began before pausing.

Before she could finish her sentence, a strong male voice called from behind Yen. “Is there a problem here?”

Yen turned to find himself face to face with Eminent Merric. At first, he simply stared at the Pilgrim, uncomprehending of why he would be getting involved in their personal conversation. Subtly, though, Yen caught Merric’s stolen glances toward Keryn. Suddenly, it became painfully apparent, and Yen was suddenly aware that he was caught standing in between Merric and Keryn.

Turning quickly on Keryn, Yen’s face betrayed his surprise and hurt. “You and Merric? How could you?”

Keryn’s eyes flashed angrily. “Me? How could I do this? That’s more than a little hypocritical, don’t you think?”

“What are you talking about?” Yen said, his volume rising in reflection with his frustration.

“You need to keep your voice down,” Merric threatened from behind Yen.

“Stay out of this,” both Yen and Keryn replied simultaneously.

“What am I talking about?” Keryn asked. “I’m talking about you and Iana Morven!”

Yen stared dumbfounded at the Wyndgaart woman before him. He struggled to figure out how she could have known about them.

Misjudging Yen’s confusion, Keryn continued with a sadistic smile. “That’s right, Yen. I saw you two together, so much in love as you exited the movie theater last night. And somehow I don’t think this is the hotel that you’re staying in.”

“That’s what this is about?” Yen said, laughing despite his frustration. “This is all about me and Iana?”

Keryn flushed with anger at his laughter. “Don’t try to deny it!”

“Believe me, I’m not! But you’re basing this entire argument on the fact that you saw me with another woman. Not kissing her. Not holding hands. Just with her. So all this anger and all this jealousy is based off the fact that you can’t stand to see me with someone else. You don’t want to be with me, but Gods forbid that I’m happy with anyone else.” Yen’s eyes narrowed and his voice dropped dangerously. “And because you saw me with another woman, that gives you the right to go have sex with your boss?”

Keryn’s hand struck so quickly that Yen didn’t have time to raise his own in defense. Her open strike caught Yen across the cheek, snapping his head to the side. Turning back toward her, Yen stared at her in disbelief. He could feel the marks on his face stinging strongly from where her firm slap had struck. Keryn looked back defiantly, though tears welled in her eyes and spilled down her cheeks. Without a word, she turned away and stormed out the door.

With her slap, the anger and irritation Yen had felt fled from his body. He hadn’t intended to be so harsh and he felt guilty after seeing that his words had made her cry. A mixture of emotions drove him; conflicting urges to both pursue her out of love or out of betrayal and anger fought within him. Confounded, Yen stood in the lobby and stared at her departure.

His revelry was broken by a rough shoulder nudging him out of the way. Merric walked past arrogantly with a faint smile on his lips. Raising a hand, he waved as he reached the doors leading out into the street.

“So sorry, Xiao,” Merric said haughtily as he held the door open. “I guess it’s true what they say: you can’t win them all. Best of luck next time around.”

As the door swung shut behind Merric, Yen’s emotional turmoil disappeared. All his conflicting feelings of love and hurt toward Keryn were replaced by a yearning for revenge against Merric.

Common sense quickly reasserted itself as he stepped outside, into the blindingly bright artificial sunlight. Though he looked up and down the street, Yen could see no sign of Keryn. He had no doubt that, once out of sight of the hotel, she had run back to wherever she was staying. Frustrated, Yen knew that he had to make things right with Keryn. Regardless of his feelings of betrayal, he still loved her. Now, though, Yen found himself facing a sprawling three-level city and hundreds of streets and alleyways. He would find her before shore leave was done and they returned to the Revolution; he was sure of that. Sighing, he knew that finding her would probably take all day. Pushing his plans of relaxation to the back of his mind, Yen set off to find the woman he loved.

CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE

Keryn let her feet lead her through the city, oblivious to her final destination. In reality, it mattered little to her. Her mind whirled with dread, replaying the events at the hotel. She rubbed her eyes, still painfully aware of the hot tears that still leaked from their corners. She loved Yen; there was no denying it. But in her haste to find herself after separating from the Voice, she had unwittingly fallen into the arms of a man she truly didn’t think she liked. Merric had been convenient, a distraction from the weight of leadership. He had understood her complaints and worries about being the Squadron Commander since he served in such an influential position on board the Revolution. She had been able to speak frankly about fellow officers and not only did he understand her dilemmas, he was able to add constructive criticism about the individuals, since he knew them personally. But is that what she really wanted in a relationship? Constructive criticism? Of course she knew the answer. Keryn wanted Yen, but her rash decision to bed Merric might have cost her the one chance she had with him.

Looking up, Keryn wasn’t at all surprised to find herself standing outside the Frozen Nebula. Even in her distraction, she had come somewhere familiar, and on an unknown space station, familiar areas were few and far between. Pushing open the door, Keryn let the cool air and soft music wash over her, cleaning away the mental grime of the rest of the entertainment level. Glancing briefly at her from his task of cleaning the glasses with a spotless rag, the bartender nodded before resuming his task.

Being early afternoon, the bar was mostly deserted. Those who had come for lunch had already finished their meals and moved on. It was still too early for the night time festivities, and many who sat in the bar did so to drink away their problems. In sharp realization, Keryn wondered if that wasn’t exactly why she was there as well. Away from the others, separated from any chance of running into Crewmen from the Revolution, and in a bar that catered to a very small crowd, the Frozen Nebula had inadvertently become Keryn’s escape from reality. Sliding up to the bar, Keryn dropped heavily into a barstool.

The bartender moved in her direction. Stopping in front of her, he gave a soft smile that spoke volumes on how much he understood her pain. “Rough day already?” he asked, ready to spill forth the sage wisdom that every bartender accumulated during their time serving drinks. “Let me get you a drink and you can tell me all about it.”

“I’ll take the drink,” Keryn replied curtly, “but I’ll keep my problems to myself.”

“Suit yourself,” the bartender said politely. She ordered the same drink Merric had bought for her the night before and cringed at her first sip.

She knew now that last night had been a terrible mistake. Seeing Yen and Iana together had made her angry and, in retaliation, she had turned to a friendly face for comfort. It had seemed an innocuous act the night before, but the ramifications were more than Keryn thought she could bear. Her one night of pleasure had brought immeasurable pain in her life. What if Yen never forgave her, either for sleeping with Merric or for publicly humiliating him by slapping him in the hotel lobby? She could clearly remember the look of shear disbelief on his face and the four red lines of her fingers imprinted on his cheek. It had been a short-sighted reaction to his harsh words, but he hadn’t been wrong to say those things. Still, she hadn’t been the first to find comfort in the arms of