'Oh, do you like my legs? These minis do something for legs, don't they? I mean, if you've
'At twenty-three that might, possibly, be desirable,' said Humphrey. At thirty-three, no! You seem to forget that you are almost middle-aged, my dear. I've told you before, and I tell you again...'
''He said it very loud and clear; he went and shouted in her ear,'' said Tancred. 'Oh, come off it, Humphrey!' He turned to Binnie, rolled his dark eyes and declaimed:
'Ah, shall I have you only in my dreams,
And long for sleep, and loathe to be awake?'
'What are you babbling about?' snarled Humphrey.
'I am quoting the first two lines of a little thing of my own,' said Tancred. 'If you talked poetry to the poor girl instead of criticising her legs...'
'I'm not criticising her legs, damn your impudence! I merely stated...'
'We are none of us criticising her legs. We are admiring those, and talking about her diet,' said Romilly. 'Ah, here comes Judith. Judith, my dear, Binnie is on a diet. What are we having for lunch?'
'A diet? Oh, dear!' said Judith. 'I'm afraid it's not diet-y food. We're having Scotch broth, turbot and a saddle of mutton. Binnie could have the turbot, I suppose, but...'
'I shall have it all,' said Binnie. 'Heavenly, heavenly lunch! We never get a lunch like that at home, not even on Sundays. I suppose Humphrey doesn't earn enough money. Perhaps, if they made him a housemaster in a big public school-'
Humphrey's snort of fury at this remark was taken by Binnie as agreement, and she seemed about to enlarge upon her theme when Tancred took her by the arm.
'What you want,' he said, 'is to hear the rest of that smashing sonnet of mine. It's all about you. Come along into the hall. The acoustics are better in there. They suit my voice.'
During lunch the wrangling between the married couple went on. Dame Beatrice could not believe that Binnie's capacity for exasperating her husband was not the result of a careful study of his vanities and his weaknesses. On the other hand, when Binnie interpolated one of her banal and meaningless remarks, Humphrey contested it with a blunt cruelty which left her, more often than not, in tears, but which induced in Dame Beatrice some sympathy for both partners in such a mesalliance. Matters were not helped by Tancred, who, as though moved by a disposition of kindness towards Binnie, invariably criticised Humphrey's arguments and, having the better brain and a poniard of wit against which Humphrey's bludgeonings seemed always to come off second best, reduced his opponent to teeth-grinding fury. At this the imbecile Binnie would leap into the arena with, 'Oh, Tancred, you beast! Oh, leave him alone! He can't help it if he isn't rich and clever!'
Dame Beatrice wondered which of them Humphrey would murder first. She extricated herself from the unseemly exchanges as soon as she could, stating that she was ready for a session with her patient.
'But it isn't the right time,' said Romilly. 'It's after tea you are to have her, isn't it? I thought you said...'
'What's this about a patient?' asked Binnie, interrupting him. 'Can I help with the nursing? I love sick- beds.'
'Yes, you may help,' said Dame Beatrice, neatly circumventing Humphrey's comments. 'Come along up to my room.'
'Oh, but, really, Beatrice!' protested Romilly. 'I thought all your sessions were to be held in secret.'
'Yes, so did I,' she replied. 'Since, however, a certain picture in my room has indicated that they are not to be so held, I see no reason to refuse Mrs Provost's reasonable and helpful request.'
'Will you call me Binnie?' the dumb blonde asked, as they went side by side up the splendid stair.
'With pleasure, my dear.'
'What's the matter with the patient? Why is she in your room? What did Uncle Romilly mean about secrets? Do you think I could get a divorce? Of course, it would ruin Humphrey's career, and I love him really, and I haven't any money of my own, so perhaps I'd better not try.'
'The patient is suffering from slight melancholia brought about by the circumstances in which she finds herself. She is not in my room, but I shall send for her. Your Uncle Romilly thinks her condition is worse than it is, and so he wishes my work here to be kept secret except, of course, from himself and his housekeeper. I do not know whether you could get a divorce, although, if you did, you could claim alimony from your husband, if you had right on your side.'
'Do you mean I could get money without having to work for it? That would be very nice, wouldn't it? I'd like to model clothes, but you need brains for that, and Humphrey is always telling me I haven't any.'
'There is no need for you to believe him, is there?'
'Do you know why we've come?'
'I thought it was to join in a family gathering.'
'No, not quite. Uncle Romilly has made all sorts of promises to make sure we came along. He has promised Humphrey a headship. There's an interview. But what would Humphrey do with a wife like me? I wouldn't know what to say to the parents, and, of course, I'd have to have better clothes. Humphrey is dreadfully mean about clothes. Just look at the rags I'm wearing!'
'I think you look very nice, and, of course, as you pointed out to us, his salary may not be large.'
'I don't know what it is. He never tells me.'
Dame Beatrice opened the door of her room to find that Rosamund had already installed herself in it. She gravely introduced the two girls.
'Oh, we've met once before,' said Binnie. 'You're not the patient, are you? I'm prettier than you, but I
