Cold, Lone and Still

them and she has to eat and clothe herself and keep the home fires burning, just like the rest of us. Sock it to them good and proper, but always the kid glove, not the iron gauntlet, on the hand which manipulates the hosepipe.’

‘Don’t he talk lovely!’ said Elsa. She blew him a kiss and went out, taking her sheaves with her. Sandy waved me to a chair, went to a cupboard and took out bottles and glasses.

‘Those letters will keep her busy for a bit,’ he said. ‘I wanted to get her out of the way. Comrie, don’t you think it’s time we offered that girl a partnership?’

‘I think it is. I’ve thought so for a long while. Anchor her down, you mean.’

‘Oh, I didn’t know she’d had offers to leave us.’

‘Lord, yes. She told Hera so when she took Hera home the other day, and Hera told me. She thought it was a plank in her platform and said as much. She said that, if Elsa went, there would be a hole which she herself could fill.’

‘Did she say that to Elsa?’

‘I shouldn’t think so.’

‘It isn’t like Elsa to talk about her own affairs.’

‘Oh, you know what women are. Even the best of them, given the chance to let their back hair down, will let it toss in the wind like the mane of Odin’s horse.’

‘I don’t believe Elsa would. If you don’t mind my saying so, I think Hera made the whole thing up.’

‘Quite possibly. You can see what a spot I’m going to be in, though, if we do make Elsa a partner. I’m all for it, mind you, but I’m in for a pretty rough time when it happens.’

‘Still, fair’s fair. She didn’t tell Hera about any offers she’s had, I’m certain of that. Her whole training is geared to her never talking out of turn. All the same, I’m prepared to bet that she has had offers and, human nature being what it is, one of those offers has only got to be big enough, if you see what I mean —’

‘Perfectly. Right, then, let’s go ahead. That’s what I meant when I talked of getting Elsa anchored here. We can’t afford to lose her.’

‘What about the name of the firm? Won’t she expect to have hers added to ours?’

‘Not at first, anyhow. I like the name Alexander Comrie and don’t want it altered. We could make that a condition, I think, but she’ll probably see for herself the point of keeping the name we’re known by. She’s a very sensible girl.’

So Elsa, obviously delighted, was added to the managerial strength and was adamant that the name of the firm should not be changed.

‘It wouldn’t inspire confidence,’ she said. ‘Alexander Comrie has such a nice, solid, Scottish sound about it and it’s known and respected all over the place.’ So Alexander Comrie we remained and all was gas and gaiters until Hera found out that we had made Elsa a full partner and that her name, although not in our trade title, was on our stationery.

‘What’s all this, and since when?’ she demanded one evening. She was spending the evening at my flat and turning it upside down as usual on one of her tidying-up blitzes.

‘What’s that?’

She had been tidying the shelves in my wardrobe — an operation I thought completely unnecessary, but one which she insisted upon carrying out from time to time, and had come upon a piece of paper on which I had scribbled down a list of things for my charwoman to send to the laundry. I had meant to copy the list on the official card the laundry always enclosed in the package when the washing came home, but had procrastinated.

‘What’s this on the agency’s notepaper?’ She came towards me and held out the scribbled-on sheet. I took it and looked it over.

‘Only a tentative laundry list,’ I said, as off-handedly as I could.

‘I can see that. You haven’t altered the trade name, but what is Elsa Moore’s name doing after Sandy’s full name and yours?’

‘You would hardly expect it to come in front of ours, would you?’

‘Oh, don’t hedge! You’ve made her a partner and I want an explanation.’

‘No explanation is due to you, my dear girl. If I had appeared at your flat with lipstick on my face, or if, in this quite unnecessary tidying-up which you know I hate, you had found a girl’s pants which you knew were not yours, you might be in order in asking certain questions, but what is on our official notepaper is our business, Sandy’s and mine, not yours.’

‘So that’s it! You have made her a partner!’

‘Yes, of course that’s it. Elsa has been with us and served the firm wonderfully well for more than five years. We decided to give some slight recognition to that fact, that is all. And now, for heaven’s sake, stop messing about with my shirts and ties and let’s have a drink.’

I folded the piece of paper, put it in my pocket and waited for the next outburst, but all she said was ‘You’ll be sorry for this.’

‘I am sorry — sorry that you found the laundry list, if you don’t like its printed heading. As a matter of fact, it was Sandy’s suggestion that we should let Elsa in and put her name on our notepaper, but, of course, I agreed. It is only to safeguard ourselves.’

‘Against what?’

‘Against losing her to another firm, of course. You know there was always the danger of that.’

‘Oh, yes? And you have never seen me as an efficient substitute? Oh, well!’