Envy

but I suspect if you were fair in your attention to them none of us would be sitting here right now.”

“Yeah, Mom,” Teagan said, clearly enjoying the focus on his mother’s child-rearing expertise—or lack thereof.

“What happened next, Teagan?”

“I pretended to be Cullen Anthony and IM’d with Katelyn and told her I wanted to come see her. That I promised to come and I had a surprise Christmas present for her.”

“The pregnancy test kit?” Annie asked.

“Right. I didn’t tell her that because I didn’t want to ruin the surprise. She said her grandparents were going to leave early and I should come over at about nine. She’d leave the window unlocked. She told me how to climb up the trellis, which I already knew, because I had done it before. She didn’t know it. But I did. I guess that makes me sound like a perv, but I never spied on her. I only looked in her window when she was gone. You know, to see what she was reading or whatever so I could be a better boyfriend.”

“A secret boyfriend,” Annie said.

“Yeah, secret until I guess she realized that I cared about her.”

“So you went over there that night …”

chapter 46

TEAGAN LARSEN PUT ON HIS COAT, gloves, and stocking cap (which in his mind was spelled stalking cap). He stashed the pregnancy wand inside his pocket, a little grossed out that his sister had actually peed on it, and said good-bye to his mom. Apparently enthralled by Jake, who was poking the log in the fire, she didn’t seem to care that her son was going out in the darkness on Christmas night.

Teagan told himself repeatedly that Katelyn would revel in the idea that Starla was pregnant, or thought she was, and when he’d pretend that he was the one who had been messaging her, well, he was sure Katelyn would forgive him. She’d see him as more than the boy next door. She’d see him as a true friend, and maybe, he hoped, as something more.

The only cars in the alleyway were Harper’s and Sandra’s; the grandparents had come and gone. A dog barked from the woods, and Teagan could hear one of the neighbors from across the road calling a cat.

“Here, kitty, kitty,” the woman’s voice said in a voice that easily carried over the cold Port Gamble night.

Maybe some coyote found your stupid cat, Teagan thought.

Teagan was grateful for the gloves as he climbed hand over hand up the trellis, hoping that the ancient wood structure would still support his wiry frame. He wasn’t afraid of heights, but he was afraid of falling, making a lot of noise, and looking like an idiot.

He hoisted himself up and worked his way over to Katelyn’s window, the only one of several on the second floor emitting any light. It was ajar. He pushed it, and in a second, was inside.

Her room. Katelyn’s beautiful, almost magical room. He’d never been in there before—except in his imagination when he pictured her typing answers to his IMs and chat messages. That was a fantasy. That was a dream. This was all very, very real. It smelled like Katelyn—pretty, light, sweet. Not like his sister’s room, which always smelled like burning incense.

Her spiritual side, he thought. What a joke!

Not Katelyn. She was spiritual. Like a lot of people who’d suffered great hurt, she never forgot how that felt. She could understand the pain of others because she’d been there herself. She was a fighter, and everything she had was because she was able to dig herself out of it. Starla thought she was on the rise, but Teagan was sure that it was Katelyn who was the true star.

And he was in her bedroom. Her wonderful, freaking awesome, amazing bedroom.

He could hear the water running in the bathroom, and he followed the sound. Each step closer, closer. He wasn’t sure that he was ready to see her naked, but he was positive that must have been something she had wanted.

Why else would she have let him come over?

The faucet stopped and the sound of her in the water beckoned.

Before opening the half-closed door, he drew in a breath. Katelyn smelled of jasmine bath salts and scented candles. It was the scent of a young woman. Not like his sister. Not like his mother.

A sweet, young woman. A woman who wanted him there. Invited him there.

He pushed the door open. And just like that, the fantasy was over.

“Teagan!” a stunned-beyond-measure Katelyn called out. “What are you doing here?”

She moved her arms to hide her breasts and sunk lower into the water, trying desperately to cover herself. Her long dark hair, which had been clipped up out of the water, became unfurled and soaked as she swiveled around.

Teagan started to shake. “You asked me to come over,” he said. “That last message was from me.”

Katelyn was angry and embarrassed—and the punk kid next door was frozen in fear.

“No, I didn’t! Teagan, get out of my bathroom! You little creep!”

What? Teagan couldn’t quite grasp what Katelyn was saying. It was at odds with how he felt about her—and how he was sure she felt about him.

“I brought you Starla’s pregnancy test. She thought Cameron knocked her up. We can report her to the school or something.”

He held out the test wand to prove what he was saying.

But Katelyn didn’t seem to care.

“Do you want me to scream?” she asked. “Get out of my bathroom!”

Teagan became frantic. This wasn’t how he thought it would be.

“I love you, Katelyn,” he said.

She turned in the tub, sending some water to the floor.

“You are seriously f-ed up, Teagan. You need help. I get that. But get the hell out of here!”

Teagan was embarrassed, confused, ashamed. All of his emotions were in a Magic Bullet and were spinning around and around. He moved forward, closer to the tub. He’d wanted to tell her he was sorry. He wasn’t going to touch her.

“Get out!” This time she was loud. Not loud enough to wake up the neighborhood, but loud enough to get him into trouble.

He was going to be in trouble. His sister was going to make fun of him. He was going to get yelled at by his mom. Jake was going to hit him again.

And yet he stood frozen, unable to move.

“IT HAPPENED SO FAST,” TEAGAN SAID to Chief Garnett. “It was so, so fast, but at the time, it happened in slow motion. Really.”

The chief’s office was pin-drop quiet.

Annie looked over at Mindee and Starla, their grim faces easily betraying their own shame and guilt over what had occurred. A lot of what the boy said was true. In fact, all of it. But what he had to tell them next was the most important part of the story—the part that would keep him out of juvenile detention in Port Orchard … or wouldn’t.

Teagan had started to tear up some more, which Annie considered a good sign. Whatever happened in that bathroom in the house next door, it had not occurred without a heaping measure of regret and hurt. Teagan might have been a bit desperate and a pervert-in-training to climb up that trellis to Katelyn’s bedroom, but he likely wasn’t as bad as the kid who sets fire to the family dog or the one who trolled the neighborhood for an open window to get a peek at a girl undressing.

“Okay,” the boy said. “I just stood there a second, not really knowing what to do. I thought she wanted me there. I really did. She was so mad at me.”

KATELYN WAS COMPLETELY PISSED OFF. “Get out of here, Teagan!”

“But, I thought …” Teagan tried to find the words that would turn all of that moment into something better. Something he’d imagined.

“You thought wrong!”

Seeing that he wasn’t going, Katelyn fumbled for the towel on the vanity adjacent to the bathtub. Once she