‘Shall you get far tonight?’ wondered Rannilt, hesitant but anxious for assurance.
‘Out of this land, I hope. Iestyn, who is nobody here, has a kinship of his own, and a place of his own, in his own country. There we shall be safe enough together. After tonight, if we make good speed, we cannot be pursued. You are not afraid, Rannilt, coming all this way with me in the dark?’
‘No,’ said Rannilt sturdily, ‘I’m not afraid. I wish you well, I wish you happy, I’m glad to carry your goods for you, and to know that you don’t go unprovided.’
‘No,’ agreed Susanna, with a curious twist to her voice that suggested laughter, ‘not quite penniless. I have earned my future, have I not? Look back now,’ she said, ‘over your left shoulder, at that mole-hill of the town.’ It showed as a hunched shadow in the shadowy night, stray flickers of light cast up the pale stone of the wall from the silver of the river in between. ‘A last glimpse,’ said Susanna, ‘for we have not far now to go. Has the load been heavy? You shall soon lay it down.’
‘Not heavy at all,’ said Rannilt. ‘I would do more for you if I could.’
The track along the headlands was rough and rutted, but Susanna knew it well, and stepped securely. On their right the ground rose, its darkness furred and fragrant with trees. On their left the smooth green meadows swept down to the lambent, murmuring Severn. Ahead, a roof heaved dimly out of the night, bushes banked about it, rough ground sheltering it to northwards, the pasture opening serenely to the south.
‘We are there,’ said Susanna, and hastened her step, so that Rannilt hurried to keep up with her and balance their burden.
Not a large building, this one that loomed out of the night, but stout in its timbers, and tall enough to show that above the stable it had a loft for hay and fodder. There was a double door set wide upon deep darkness, out of which the scent of horseflesh and hay and grainy, dusty warmth came to meet them. A man emerged, a dark shape, tensed to listen for any approaching foot. Susanna’s step he knew at once and he came with spread arms; she dropped her end of the bundle and opened her arms to him. Not a word, not a sound had passed between them. Rannilt stood clutching her end of the load, and shook as though the earth had trembled under her, as they came together in that silent, exultant embrace, laced arms straining. Once at least, if never again, she had experienced a small spark of this devouring flame. She closed her eyes, and stood quivering.
Their breaking apart was as abrupt and silent as their coming together. Iestyn looked over Susanna’s shoulder, and fixed his black glance on Rannilt. ‘Why did you bring the girl? What do we want with her?’
‘Come within,’ said Susanna, ‘and I’ll tell you. Have you saddled up? We should get away quickly.’
‘I was about it when I heard you.’ He picked up the roll of clothing, and drew her with him into the warm darkness of the stable and Rannilt followed timidly, only too aware how little need they now had of her. Iestyn closed the doors, but did not fasten them. ‘Who knows, there may still be some soul awake along the river, no need to let them see any movement here until we’re away.’
She heard and felt them embrace again in the dark, even in this brief contact becoming one by passionate consent. She knew then that they had lain together as she and Liliwin had lain, but many times and with no better hope. She remembered the rear door of Susanna’s chamber and the stair to the undercroft not many yards distant. Every temptation lavishly offered, and all countenance denied.
‘This child here,’ said Iestyn softly, ‘what’s your intent with her? Why did you bring her all this way?’
‘She sees too clear and notices too much,’ said Susanna shortly. ‘She has said to me, poor fool innocent, things she had better not have said, and had better not say to any other, for if they understood more than she by it, they might yet be the death of us. So I brought her. She can go with us?a part of the way.’
Iestyn demanded, after a brief, deep silence: ‘What do you mean by that?’
‘What do you suppose? There are woods enough and wild places your side the border. Who’s to look for her? A kinless kitchen slave.’ The voice was so calmly and reasonably Susanna’s voice that Rannilt could not take in what it was saying, and stood utterly lost and feeling herself forgotten, even while they spoke of her.
A horse stamped and shifted in the dark, the warmth of its big body tempering the night air. Shapes began to emerge faintly, shadow separating itself from shadow, while Iestyn breathed long and deeply, and suddenly shuddered. Rannilt felt him quake, and still did not understand.
‘No!’ he said in a muted cry just below his breath. ‘No, that we cannot, that I will not. Good God, what harm has she ever done us, a poor soul even less happy than we?’
‘You need not,’ said Susanna simply. ‘I can! There is nothing now I cannot do to have you mine, to belong to you, to go by your side through this world. After what I’ve done already, what is there I dare not do?’
‘No, not this! Not this offence, not if you love me. The other was forced on you, what loss was he, as mean as your kin! But not this child! I will not let you! Nor’s there no need,’ he said, turning from ordering to persuading. ‘Here are we, well out of the town, leave her here and go, you and I together, what else matters here? Let her make her way back by daylight. Where shall we be? Far past pursuit, over the border into Welsh land, safe. What harm can she do us, who has never done any yet, nor ever willed any?’
‘They will pursue! If ever my father gets to know
You know him! He would not stir a step for me, but for this?this
‘ She spurned with her foot the bundle she had brought with her, and it rang faintly in the dark. ‘There could be barriers on the way into Wales, accidents, delays
Far better be sure.’
‘No, no, no! You shall not so despoil my love, I will not have you so changed. I want you as you are now
‘
The horses shifted and blew, uneasy at having disturbing company at this hour, yet wakeful and ready. Then there was a silence, brief and fathoms deep, and ending in a long-drawn sigh.
‘My heart, my love,’ Susanna said in a melting whisper, ‘as you will, as you order
Have it your way, then
Yes, let her be! What if we are hunted? There’s nothing I can refuse you?not my life
