13
TAMARA
Bad minute or two after he locked her in the closet and she heard him leave. Alone, trapped in the dark… it brought on another scare rush. Shortness of breath, cold sweat, a crazy impulse to beat on the door with her fists, bang her head against it, punish herself for being so fucking stupid. Prowling around where she had no business, letting herself get caught like this. He’d never let her go now that she’d seen the kid. Stupid, stupid, stupid!
The little girl was crying again in the room. Deep, wracking sobs. She’s more scared than I am, got more to be scared of. The thought brought anger back, and the anger brought calm. She made herself take slow, shallow breaths until the tightness in her chest eased; last thing she needed was to start hyperventilating. All right. Better. Hot, stuffy in there; she shrugged out of her coat, used the hem to wipe sweat off her face and neck, dropped it on the floor and kicked it to one side.
What was that smell? Mold? Okay, now she was a mouth-breather.
The closet was small and tight, not much bigger than one of those portable toilets. No matter which way she stood, she couldn’t lift her arms up and out more than halfway before her hands touched wood. Nothing in it except a metal clothes rod that grazed and knocked her head until she got used to where it was. She wasn’t claustrophobic, but being shut up in a box like this did funny things to your head. No wonder some people had a horror of waking up in their own coffin, being buried alive. Suppose he kept her locked up in here until she suffocated or died of starvation or went batshit crazy She bit her lip, hard enough to hurt. None of that crap, Tamara, you quit that right now. Worrying, running your imagination just gonna make you lose it big time. Stay cool. You didn’t panic last Christmas and that was a worse scene than this, that dude was an out-of-control psycho and he had more fire-power than a SWAT team. This Lemoyne’s not anywhere near as whacked out and all he’s got is one ugly little revolver, looks like those Saturday night specials the gangbangers in the ‘hood carry. You can get out of this if you stay cool, use your head.
Yeah, sure. He outweighs me by seventy-five pounds. And he’s got that gun. And he’s out there somewhere and I’m locked up in this closet. Man’s a kidnapper, maybe worse-and crazy and dangerous no matter how near normal he looks. The way he went off on me, violence boiling up in him sudden like that. The way he kept saying he was that little girl’s daddy, calling her Angie as if he really believes she’s his daughter. Wasn’t an act, he meant it, and that’s no way sane.
Was that why he picked her, because she looks like his daughter? What’s he intend to do to her, what’s he already done?
The room out there, this closet, the locks on the doors… all just to hold this one kid? Or had there been others? How many others?
Now that her eyes had adjusted, she could make out faint strips of light at the bottom of the door, around the edges. She tried to get her fingers into the cracks, couldn’t do it; the door was tight in the jamb. Wouldn’t’ve done her any good anyway. No knob on this side, probably bolted on the outside. She felt all the way around the walls, squatted and felt the floorboards. Solid wood. No lie when he’d said there was no way out of here.
The little girl was still crying in rackety sobs. Tamara could hear, almost feel her terror. There’d never been much of a maternal streak in her, but she felt one now-a mothering urge to protect and comfort so strong it surprised her. What’d the child say her name was? Laura? No, Lauren.
She put her mouth close to one of the cracks. “Lauren, you hear me? Come on over here, honey.”
Had to say it again twice before the crying stopped. Faint squeak of bed springs, hesitant footsteps. Then, low and teary, “I don’t like it here, I want to go home.”
“I know you do. So do I, Lauren.”
“You know my name.”
“Sure I do. Mine’s Tamara.”
“That man calls me Angie. Why’s he do that?”
“He had a little girl named Angie once. Maybe you look like her.”
“Where is she now?”
“I don’t know. Maybe her mama took her away somewhere, a long way away where her daddy can’t find her.”
“Why?”
“I don’t know.” But I can sure guess.
Sniffling sounds. Then, “Why’d he put you in the closet? It’s dark in there.”
“He’s a bad man, that’s why.”
“He keeps saying he’s my daddy. He’s not my daddy.”
“He’s not anybody’s daddy anymore.”
“He said I could go home if I didn’t throw up or wet the bed again.”
“Where do you live?”
“I’m scared. Why can’t I go home?”
“Where’s home? Where do you live?”
“Vallejo.”
“Where in Vallejo?”
“On Patterson Street. Our house is number one-sixty-three.”
Went all the way up there to snatch the kid. Why?
“You know him, honey, the man who brought you here?”
“No. I was playing in the park. Mama was there but she went to the bathroom and then he was there.”
“Never saw him before he took you away?”
“Uh-uh. He grabbed me and wrapped me up in a blanket and put me in a car. He said I had to be quiet or else.”
“Did he hurt you?”
“I threw up in the car. All over the blanket.”
“Did he hurt you, Lauren?”
“No.”
“Take your clothes off? Touch you where he shouldn’t?”
“Uh-uh.”
Something, anyway.
“What’d he say after he brought you here?”
“He said if I was a good girl I could go home. He gave me a doll to play with, but I don’t like it, it’s a white doll. I wish I had Alana Michelle.”
“Who’s Alana Michelle?”
“My doll. She’s African-American. I’m just half African-American ‘cause my daddy’s white. Mama helped me braid her hair just like mine. I don’t think you can braid the white doll’s hair.”
“What else did the man say to you?”
“He said he loved me.”
The words put ice on Tamara’s spine.
“How can he love me?” Lauren said. “He doesn’t know me and I don’t know him. He’s not my daddy. I don’t want to go with him to the trailer.”
“What trailer, honey?”
“I don’t know. He said we were going to a trailer in the woods and there’d be a big surprise for me and we’d have lots of fun. But I don’t want to go.”
“What woods? Where?”
“I don’t know. There’s deer and elk around. What’s a elk?”
“A big animal like a deer. Did he say what the surprise was? What kind of fun?”
“No. Can you have fun with a elk?”
“Not unless you’re another elk. Lauren-”
“I have to go to the bathroom,” she said.
