understands that.' There was kindness in her tone, and sympathy that sounded genuine.
To her absolute horror, Blair felt her eyes well with tears. Abruptly, she rose and crossed to the front window, desperately trying to contain her sadness. 'Cam understands,' she said, her back to face Marcea. 'I know she does. But she has a job to do, and I'm her job. That comes first.'
'Yes. I know how seriously she takes that. I'm sure that's why she was given the job.' Marcea's voice was calm and gentle. 'Loving you must make it quite a challenge for you both.'
Startled, Blair turned abruptly, meeting Marcea's eyes. 'Has she said-'
'No,' Marcea said with another smile. 'But it's plain to see every time she looks at you. I'm not trying to excuse her, you know. She's like her father-completely devoted to her work, often to the exclusion of her own needs. But in her defense-'
'You don't need to defend her to me. I lo She fell silent, shocked. She hadn't meant to say that-she'd never said that to anyone-about anyoneever before. First, because thered neverbeen anyone about whom to say it. And even had there been, there was no one to whom she would've felt safe saying it. Not even to Diane-not because she didn't trust her friend with the knowledge, but because saying it would make it real. She'd have to acknowledge her own vulnerability. To say it would be tofeel it, and that was terrifying.
The silence between them grew longer until Marcea spoke softly.
'I didn't intend to defend her. I'm sorry-it's the mother in me. I only meant to say that despite her single- mindedness, she cares.'
'I know she does'. Blair tilted the glass and swallowed the rest of the wine. She carried it to the sideboard and placed it carefully on the silver serving tray.I only wish I knew if it was me or the First Daughter who came first in her affections.
She turned and said tonelessly, 'I need to call her. I promised I'd let her know when we got back.'
'I hope I haven't offended you.'
'No. You haven't.'
Wordlessly, they nodded good night. As Blair passed Stark in the dining room, she informed her without turning in her direction, 'I'm going to bed.'
Start did not reply, because no reply was required. She'd already radioed Mac to inform him that Egret was secured for the night, and she had called Cameron Roberts in Washington DC to tell her the same thing.
Now, she herself could go to bed.
*****
Blair showered quickly and got into bed, naked. She turned off the lights and punched in Cam's number by the faint glow from the LCD readout on her cell. The line was picked up after the first ring.
'Roberts.'
'It's me.'
'How are you?'
'Tired, I think. Jet lag probably.'
'Yes.'
Neither of them mentioned that in the last two weeks there'd been an assassination attempt, a car bombing, and several explosions-all of the events involving Blair or a member of her security detail.
Blair shifted on her side so she could watch the moon as it moved slowly in and out behind the few scattered clouds in the sky. The house was very still and quiet-unlike the ever-present city noises she was used to hearing, even from her eighth floor penthouse on Gramercy Park in NYC. The view, too, was so different than New York, the sky somehow brighter and the stars more brilliant. It was beautiful, and she felt again the stab of loneliness. 'What does it look like, out of your window?'
Cam was silent a moment as she focused on the night. 'The sky is nearly cloudless, and very black. I can see the stars and a lot of planes taking off and landing. There's a glow off to the left that reaches into the lower layers of the clouds-that's the White House. It's always flooded with light. I'm surprised anyone can sleep-' She laughed shortly. 'Well, you know that don't you?'
'It's not easy to sleep there,' Blair said thoughtfully. 'For any number of reasons. As you know, it's not my favorite place.'
Cam chuckled. 'I have noticed that.'
'It's what, almost three there?'
'Just about.'
'And what time do you bureaucrat types reconvene in the morning?'
'Seven.' Cam tried to keep her weariness from showing in her voice. 'I think thebureaucrats feel guilty about not really doing anything, so they work extra long hours to make up for it.'
'I believe you have a point,' Blair agreed, laughing. 'You should go to sleep, Cam. You've got to be even more tired than I am.'
'At least I don't have to contend with jet lag.'
'No, but you haven't had much sleep in the last week and you're hurt.'
There was silence and Blair could envision Cam trying to find a neutral comeback. That silence was more telling than anything else. 'How bad is it?'
'I've got a knot on the back of my head that throbs at inopportune moments. Of course, it could be listening to Doyle for twelve hours-'
'Cam.'
Cam heard the serious tone in Blair's voice and sighed. 'I feel like a stream roller ran over me-coming and going. Twice.'
'What else?' Shed seen the bruises the day before God, was it just yesterday? and although they looked painful, it would take more than that to make Cam complain.
'Nothing too bada bit of dizziness, a little blurry visi
'Jesus. You shouldnt be workingyou should be in bed. Can't you postpone this goddamned briefing?'
'It's got to be done-and the sooner the better. Events tend to get skewed the longer we wait. People have selective memory loss, or fortuitous recollections that make them look good and everyone else look bad.'
'You expect trouble, dont you?'
Again Cam hesitated, because she had spent more than a dozen years on the payroll of the US Treasury Department, and she wasnt used to discussing her work with anyone. Even when she and Janet had been together, they hadnt talked shop. And Janet had been a cop.If wed talked a little more, maybe I would have known where shed be that morning. Maybe I could have warned her off. Maybe she wouldnt be de
'Cam?'
'Sorry. I guess I am tired'. She rubbed her eyes, pushed the memories aside. 'We have one dead agent and two seriously wounded. You came very close to being a victim yourself. Any one of those events is a serious issue. All of them togetherthere has to be an accounting'.
'But youre okay in all of this, right? My God, Cam you almost died. If it hadnt been for you, who knows what would have happened to Grant and Savard'.
'I'll be fine. Dont worry'.
'Willyou tell me what happens?' Blair knew that she was asking Cam to cross a line. But they'd crossed so many already, and if they were ever going to have anything together-
She waited.
'Full report.'
'I miss you.' It took all Blair's willpower to say it, but it was such an overwhelming feeling that she had nowhere else to put it. She had to give it voice or choke on it.
'I'd give anything I have to be lying next to you right now,' Cam said very quietly. 'Anything.'
'You know what makes me angry so about you, Roberts?'
'No, what?'
'I can't stay angry at you very long.'
Cam laughed. 'I have to have something going for me, because I know that most of the chips don't fall on my side.'
'You're wrong about that, Commander.'
Blair's voice was very quiet, too, but Cam heard her clearly. 'Things will get better once these debriefings are
