33
I didn't know what to do. I didn't feel crazy, but isn't that part of being crazy-You didn't know it? Karl seemed to be aware of being nuts. Did it make him a higher functioning fruitcake than I had become? Scary.
I walked through town trying to sort it all out. I guess that's what we mental health guys do. We wander through city streets talking to ourselves, trying to make sense. Crazy or not, it was time to organize my head. Oddly enough, when it came time to do that in the past, I sought out Jerry Number Two. Jerry was smart, knew a lot of what other people didn't, and had access to the world through his computers. Jerry also loved Dungeons and Dragons, Star Trek and other things, but hey, nobody's perfect. Jerry lived in the college section of town, in a basement apartment. He prefers the damp basement because it helps his horticultural hobby flourish. That is, his pot plants grew really well and no one could spot them. Jerry never seemed to mind an unannounced visit.
'Duff…what brings you here in the middle of the afternoon?' Jerry's doorbell played 'Keep On Truckin' by The Dead.
'You got a few minutes to help me understand something?'
'Sure, Duff. I was doing some online gaming, but I'll just commit suicide. It will take just a minute.' I didn't ask.
I took a seat in a big round rattan chair, struggling to get comfortable. Jerry came back with some dark, odd looking tea, and sat in front of me on a floor pillow with his legs crossed.
'All right, Duff. Shoot.'
'Jerry, I know everyone thinks I'm crazy, so you don't have to pretend otherwise. I want to lay some shit out to you and I want you to tell me what you think.'
Jerry nodded.
'First of all, let me run down what I know; Number One: Karl, who by the way is nuts, believes that defense contractors, specifically private security firms, are benefiting from a large national defense budget.'
'So far no one will argue,' Jerry said.
'Two, Karl claims he, after he had a horrible time accidentally killing some children, was recruited by an old high school buddy to be part of a private security firm.'
'Ditto. Sounds very possible.'
'Three, Karl claims his buddy, in an effort to sell the job, showed him some highly classified documentation this firm or somebody had a plan to influence…bring about…create the right atmosphere…I don't know how to say it. To perpetuate terrorist acts within the United States so the public would be both distracted and remain scared enough to stay positive about funding a huge defense budget.'
Jerry sipped his tea, looking deep in thought.
'Alright, Duff let's break this down with what we know and what we don't know.' He sipped his tea, wiped a dribble of it on his chin.' Fact: there is at least 25 billion-that's with a 'B'-in US funds unaccounted for in Iraq and Afghanistan. There's no doubt many, many people have gotten rich in the last 10 years.'
'Twenty-five billion? That's hard to conceptualize.'
'Yeah, which works to their advantage.'
'Yeah.'
'All right, do the security firms have a history of nefarious conduct to guarantee they continue to get the bucks? No question. There's documentation of pay-offs, people disappearing. You name it. The problem is, they operate outside any laws so there's only speculation on how far they'd go.' Jerry sipped and thought.
'Is domestic terrorism out of the question?'
'Do you realize how many people get rich on multiple billions? I think it's entirely possible.'
'Is there any precedent for this happening? Anything we can prove?'
'Like we talked about at the bar, there's plenty of evidence. There's certainly plenty of evidence of people in power screwing those who aren't in power, for money. There's no question. I told you before, that our own government now admits it considered bombing ourselves and making it look like Castro did it, so there would be support for invading Cuba. That got out. Can you imagine what we don't know?' Jerry slurped some tea.
'Here's the thing I don't get. How do they get people to do the terrorism for them? Karl says they find people ripe for it and they take it from there. Is it even possible.' Jerry raised his eyebrows and thought for a moment.
'Duff, we have to assume they have unlimited financial resources, which means they have unlimited resources, period. There are those who claim brainwashing techniques exist and are effective on the right-especially troubled-people. There are also drugs that make people more suggestible, but I think it might be even easier than we think.'
'How so?'
'Duff, you work with troubled people. You know there are no shortage of pissed off, angry people who've been kicked around for their whole lives. Is it really inconceivable with the right prompting, and maybe some pharmacological influence, a charismatic figure could get them to pull a trigger, set off a bomb or poison the forces that have treated them so badly?'
'So let me get this straight. This guy, Newstrom, finds people ready to explode, or who have the potential, and the make up to do it, and he pushes them over the edge. But it can't work on everybody he tries can it?'
'I doubt it and it probably explains why the events occur at unpredictable intervals.'
'So, Jerry, I might be nuts, but not necessarily. I mean, there's a chance this shit could be true.'
'Well, Duff there's a chance, but you also have to look at some other things.'
'I don't understand.'
'You've been subject to severe stress, some of it for years. You've had clearly diagnosable head trauma- multiple trauma, and you've been experiencing dissociative episodes-panic reactions whatever.'
'So?'
'You might be right on with this shit or…'
'Or what?''
'You might be fuckin' nuts,' Jerry said.
34
'He's been here,' Karl said. I had just walked in the door. Al wasn't even barking. His eyes just went back and forth from me to Karl.
'How do you know?' I felt a throb go to the front of my forehead.
Karl handed me a single page of paper. There was a single paragraph typed on it.
I tried to help you out after your trouble. If you had come along, you could've been better by now and had enough money in your pocket to be set for life. Instead you made your choices. The thing is, there's always going to be the military whether it's needed, sort of needed, or not needed at all. There's just too much money in it, and if it's just going to be, you should've come on board. It's too late for all that now, buddy. I'm here and it's over. You made too much noise and continue to make too much noise. You've been discredited, but now I'm afraid with your new social work friend, people may start to listen. We're working on Dombrowski and he's already being seen as an idiot. Anyway, the mission will be carried on. You used to speak of suicide and how you'd like to have at least that kind of control. You may want to give that some thought again because we're here and we're coming for you. It's up to you how you go out. In the mean time, we need to get to school — If you know what I mean. N.
'He wants you to kill yourself again? Is that what this all means?'
'He was around when I got suicidal. I used to say I'd rather go out on my own doing than have them get me. I still feel that way,' he said.
'So he's in town to carry out the next part of his plan, isn't he?'
'Yeah.'
'Which is a Columbine type thing?'
'That's what he wants us to believe.'
