you came over all Pater Familias with her.'
'All what?'
'It means Head of the Family, with connotations of ownership of the estate and everything and everyone in it. It's Latin.'
'I was just concerned, that's all. She's been gone all night. As her father…'
'That's just what I'm talking about. As her father you want to decide where she can go, what she can do, who she sees, where she lives.'
'She's my daughter. It's my duty to look after her.'
'She'll always be your daughter, no one can change that, but she's not a child any more. She's seen too much, done too much, to be comfortable living within the constraints of childhood. She was forced to grow up, too quickly and too harshly, that much I'll grant you, but she was. You can't undo what was done, Niall.'
'So I should let her stay out all night, take drugs, get drunk, get pregnant?'
'You make those sound as if they're equivalent.' There was a warning in Blackbird's tone.
'An unwanted pregnancy isn't what she needs, Blackbird. Even you must acknowledge that.'
'She may not be able to get pregnant. Have you thought of that?'
'I'm not sure I want to find out just yet. I'm more worried that she'll be mugged — killed even.'
'I think she can look after herself. She's proven extraordinarily resilient up until now. You brought her up well, and she's chosen her own path. Now it's up to her.'
'She has no common sense. She'll do something rash. What if she's ill? What if she gets run over? She has no road sense at all.'
'Listen to yourself. You're treating her like a four year-old. Have some respect for her. Did she sound like she was in trouble? Was she begging for assistance?'
'No, but…'
'You found her last time because she needed you. You rescued her when she couldn't help herself. This time she doesn't want to be rescued, especially by you.'
'What do you mean, especially by me?'
'You're her father. You're the last person she wants to come to her aid. She wants a white knight on a charger, who'll tell her she's worth the slings and arrows that he faced to reach her. You have to face it, Niall. She's looking for a mate.'
'A what!'
'Calm down. Not right away, and maybe not for some time, but eventually she's going to want to choose someone for herself, someone to be with.'
I pushed my hand back through my hair. 'I'm too young for this,' I said.
Blackbird laughed. 'She's been through a lot and she's endured. She's earned her independence. Anyway, there's nothing you can do about it. It seems she's been paying a lot more attention to Fionh's lessons than you gave her credit for, and now that's paying off. If she doesn't want to be found, you won't find her.'
'She's not supposed to use it against me.'
'She's using it for herself. You can't blame her.'
'What am I going to tell Katherine?' I asked.
'Tell her the truth. Tell her you've tried to find Alex and failed. What can she say?'
'More than I want to hear.'
'She bears some of the responsibility for this Niall. I think she knows that.'
'You'd have to pull her teeth out to get her to admit it.'
'Look at it this way, it solved one problem. You don't have to tell Katherine why Alex can't go back to living at home with her. She's chosen for herself, and there's nothing Katherine can do about that, any more than you.'
'What if she gets hurt? Where will she sleep? What will she do for money?'
'Let her figure it out, Niall. She knows how to find you. All you have to do is make it clear that if she does come back, it's on her terms, and that you'll accept that.'
'Her terms? What does that mean?'
'It means not locking her up in your ivory tower until you can find a suitable man to palm her off on.'
'I haven't… there's no way…'
'The West Wing, then. Have you allowed her out? Has she been able to buy clothes, meet people?'
'She's hardly been in a state to be allowed to…'
'Allowed. That's an interesting word, Niall. Well, she no longer needs your permission or seeks it. She's taken responsibility for herself, and actually it's time. Now you have to trust her.'
'That's harder than you think.'
She looked down at our son who had eaten his fill and then flopped asleep in her arms. 'Oh, when this little one wants to fledge and fly I expect to be biting my nails at the edge of the nest just like any parent, but it doesn't change what has to happen. They can't stay in the nest forever. That's just nature.'
'Yeah, well let's just hope it isn't red in tooth and claw.'
Alex sat on the steps outside a red-brick apartment block. The steps were stained with green algae, but she had a blister on her heel and she didn't care. She delved into her bag looking for a plaster or something to cushion her foot, but of course, there was nothing. She had make-up which she wasn't wearing, a hair clip that fell out, but nothing useful like a plaster.
She looked up and down the street. Away from the main streets where the chain stores made easy pickings, there were little corner shops with eagle-eyed shopkeepers who kept everything behind the counter, and long walks between them. She needed to head back to the high street where she could get what she needed. What she really needed, though, was somewhere to stay.
It was all very well being free to go where you wanted but if you had nowhere to go back to it wore thin pretty quick. Her feet were sore, the weather had broken and there was the threat of rain. Her thin cardie was no longer the comfort it had been. She needed shelter, and food, and a warm bed, and central heating, and chocolate.
Momentarily she thought about going home, but there was nothing there for her now. She had no clothes, no stuff, no room even. And her dad would be furious with her after she warded him out this morning. It would take him days to calm down. If she went back now she would be grounded for months. She couldn't even go to Kayleigh's. She had no friends now, there just wasn't anyone she could talk to, except maybe Tate.
Initially him calling her Miss all the time had annoyed her, but now she kinda liked it. He always treated her respectfully and asked her what she wanted to do. He offered advice, but didn't get all antsy if she didn't follow it. And he was huge. She caught herself wondering if he was that big all over, and found herself blushing. No, she didn't think of him like that. He was a friend, that was all.
She pushed her hands through her unruly hair — she couldn't go to Tate anyway. He was a Warder, just like Dad, and he would have to tell Dad where she was, and then there would be hell to pay. That wasn't going to work.
She stood and brushed at the green marks on her skirt, making them worse rather than better. She needed a change of clothes as well. She sniffed at her armpit and wished again that she'd made use of the shower in the hotel before running out like a scared cat. What was the matter with her? She'd had the situation under control, so why run? She shook her head at her own folly.
There were people she knew, though, weren't there? There were the other people like her, the ones from Porton Down. She wasn't the only one who had escaped, and she had an idea where one or two of them might have gone. Maybe she needed to be with her own kind, people who'd understand what she was going though?
Hoisting the bag back onto her shoulder, she headed back towards an area where there were sandwich shops and a high street chemist — somewhere she could get something for her feet. Then she would take a trip and see what she could find.
'Is this what Alex did when I tried to speak to her?' I was sitting on the fence overlooking the fields which rolled away from us.
'No. What she did, I think, was to ward where she was staying against you,' said Blackbird. 'A warding can apply to a place, or an object, or a person. Warding a place is simple and effective. You exclude anyone's magic but your own. In its finer form it can be used to clean and protect a place, a home perhaps, so that malicious magic cannot intrude, but even then it has limitations. Anything brought into that space which is tainted with another's
