She was shaking, staring at those marks, thinking of the ones she’d touched — twenty on one index finger alone. “So many,” she said. “You’ve killed so many.”
“I’m a soldier.”
Karou imagined her own four chimaera dead and put a hand over her mouth, afraid she might be sick. When he’d been telling her of the war, it was a world away. But Akiva was real and right in front of her, and the fact that he was a killer was real now, too. Like teeth spilled across Brimstone’s desk, all those marks stood for blood, death — not of wolves and tigers, but the blood and death of chimaera.
She was looking at him, fixed on him, and… she saw something. As if the moment split like an eggshell to reveal another moment inside it, almost indistinguishable from it — almost — and then it was gone, and time stood intact. Akiva was just as he had been and nothing at all had happened, but that glimpse…
Karou heard herself say, in a vague voice that might have emanated from within that eggshell moment, “You have more now.”
“What?” Akiva regarded her, blank — then, like lightning strike,
Karou drew back. Akiva seized her hand. “What do you mean, I have more now?”
She shook her head. More marks, she’d meant. She had seen something in that spliced moment. There was the real Akiva, sitting before her, and there was a flash of the impossible, too: Akiva
But Karou would swear that he had
And that impossible Akiva, who had existed for that instant — there had been something else: his hands had carried fewer marks, some of his fingers entirely bare of them.
Her hand was still in his, resting in the puddle of his spilled tea. The waitress came out from behind the counter and stood poised with a towel, uncertain. Karou extricated her hand and sat back to let her wipe up the mess, which she did, still glancing back and forth between them. When she was finished she asked, hesitantly, “I was just wondering… I was wondering how you did it.”
Karou looked at her, uncomprehending. The waitress was a girl about her own age, full-cheeked and flushed. “Last night,” she clarified. “The flying.”
Ah. The flying. “You were there?” Karou asked. It seemed a strange coincidence.
“I wish,” said the girl. “I saw it on TV. It’s been on the news all morning.”
“Were there wires?” the waitress asked. “They couldn’t find any wires or anything.”
Karou said, “No wires. We were really flying,” then gave her trademark wry smile.
The girl beamed back, thinking she was part of a joke. “Don’t tell me, then,” she said, mock-angry, and she left them alone except to bring Akiva more tea.
He was still sitting back, regarding Karou with those lightning-strike wide eyes and that vivid, searching wariness.
“What?” she asked, self-conscious. “Why are you looking at me like that?”
He lifted his hands and raked his nails through his dense, cropped hair, holding on to his head for a beat. “I can’t help it,” he said, abashed.
Karou experienced a fizz of pleasure. She realized that over the course of the morning all the hardness had gone from his face, or nearly. His lips were softly parted, his gaze unguarded, and now that she’d seen — imagined? — that impossible flash of a smile, it wasn’t so difficult to imagine it could happen again, and for real this time.
For her, maybe.
Oh god.
Her voice exploded in Karou’s ear.
“It’s me—”
“Oh my god! Are you all right? I saw you on the news. I saw
“I know. Isn’t it awesome?”
“It is
“You’re really okay?” Zuzana asked. “He doesn’t have, like, a knife to your throat, forcing you to say you are?”
“He doesn’t even speak Czech,” Karou assured her, then gave her a quick rundown of the previous night, letting her know he hadn’t tried to hurt her — had gone to extremes of passiveness to
“The hell? Was it a date?”
“
“Karou? Hello?
Karou blinked and cleared her throat. It had happened again: her own name, floating right past, unconnected to herself. She sensed from Zuzana’s agitation that she had been missing in action for a few beats past any acceptable span of zoning out. “I’m here,” she said.
“
Karou had momentarily forgotten. “Um. Oh. The teahouse on Nerudova.”
“Sit. Stay. I’m coming there.”
“No, you’re not—”
“Yes, I am.”
“Zuze—”
“
“Fine,” Karou relented. “Come on, then.”
Zuzana boarded with a widow aunt in Hradc?any, not far away. “I’ll be there in ten,” she said.
Karou couldn’t resist telling her, “It’s faster if you fly.”
“Freak. Don’t you dare leave. And don’t let him leave, either. I have threats to deliver. Judgments to pass.”
“I don’t think he’s going anywhere,” said Karou, and she looked straight at Akiva as she said it, and he looked back, molten, and she knew it was true, but she didn’t know why.
He wasn’t human. He wasn’t even from her world. He was a soldier with scores of kills on his hands, and he was the enemy of her family. And yet, something tied them together, stronger than any of that, something with the power to conduct her blood and breath like a symphony, so that anything she did to fight against it felt like discord, like disharmony with her
As far back as she could remember, a phantom life had mocked her with its impenetrable “something else,” but now it was the opposite. Here, in the circle of Akiva’s presence, even as they spoke of war and siege and