database. HANNAH Same period? BERNARD Yes, but he wasn't poet like our Ezra, he was a botanist who
described a dwarf dahlia in Martinique6 and died there after being bitten
by a monkey. HANNAH And Ezra Chater? BERNARD He gets two references in the periodical index, one for each book,
in both cases a substantial review in the Piccadilly Recreation, a thrice
weekly folio sheet, but giving no personal details. HANNAH And where was this [the hook]? BERNABD Private collection. I've got a talk to give next week, in London, and
I think Chater is interesting, so anything on him, or this Septimus Hodge,
Sidley Park, any leads at all . . . I'd be most grateful.
[Pause. ]
HANNAH Well! This is a new experience for me. A grovelling academic.
BERNARD Oh, I say.
HANNAH Oh, but it is. All the academics who reviewed my book patronized
it. BERNARD Surely not. HANNAH Surely yes. The Byron gang unzipped their flies and patronized all
over it. Where is it you don't bother to teach, by the way? BERNARD Oh, well, Sussex, actually. HANNAH Sussex. [She thinks a moment.] Nightingale. Yes; a thousand words
in the Observer7 to see me off the premises with a pat on the bottom. You
must know him. BERNARD As I say, I'm in your hands. HANNAH Quite. Say please, then.
5. British Dictionary of National Biography. 7. British Sunday newspaper. 6. One of the Windward Islands of the Caribbean.
.
ARCADIA II.5 / 2769
BERNARD Please. HANNAH Sit down, do. BERNARD Thank you.
[He takes a chair. She remains standing. Possibly she smokes; if so, perhaps now. A short cigarette-holder sounds right, too. Or brown-paper cigarillos.]
HANNAH How did you know I was here? BERNARD Oh, I didn't. I spoke to the son on the phone but he didn't mention
you by name . . . and then he forgot to mention me. HANNAH Valentine. He's at Oxford,8 technically. BERNARD Yes, I met him. Brideshead Regurgitated.9 HANNAH My fiance.
[She holds his look.] BERNARD [Pause.] I'll take a chance. You're lying. HANNAH [Pause] Well done, Bernard. BERNARD Christ. HANNAH He calls me his fiancee. BERNARD Why? HANNAH It's a joke. BERNARD You turned him down? HANNAH Don't be silly, do I look like the next Countess of? BERNARD No, no?a freebie. The joke that consoles. My tortoise Lightning,
my fiancee Hannah. HANNAH Oh. Yes. You have a way with you, Bernard. I'm not sure I like it. BERNARD What's he doing, Valentine? HANNAH He's a postgrad. Biology. BERNARD No, he's a mathematician. HANNAH Well, he's doing grouse.1 BERNARD Grouse? HANNAH Not actual grouse. Computer grouse. BERNARD Who's the one who doesn't speak?
HANNAH Gus.
BERNARD What's the matter with him?
HANNAH I didn't ask.
BERNARD And the father sounds like a lot of fun.
HANNAH Ah yes.
BERNARD And the mother is the gardener. What's going on here? HANNAH What do you mean? BERNARD I nearly took her head off?she was standing in a trench at the
time. HANNAH Archaeology. The house had a formal Italian garden until about
1740. Lady Croom is interested in garden history. I sent her my book?it
contains, as you know if you've read it?which I'm not assuming, by the
way?a rather good description of Caroline's garden at Brocket Hall. I'm
here now helping Hermione. BERNARD [Impressed] Hermione. HANNAH The records are unusually complete and they have never been worked on.
8. University, attended by Sebastian Flyte, anti-9. Vomited up. hero of Evelyn Waugh's satirical novel of British 1. Valentine is researching into changes in the upper-class life, Brideshead Revisited (1945). Sidley Park population of the grouse, a game bird.
.
2770 / TOM STOPPARD
BERNARD I'm beginning to admire you. HANNAH Before was bullshit? BERNARD Completely. Your photograph does you justice, I'm not sure the
book does.
