IOO Although her mode of speaking was not pure; For native Spanish she had no great care,
At least her conversation was obscure; Her thoughts were theorems, her words a problem, As if she deem'd that mystery would ennoble 'em.
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'Tis pity learned virgins ever wed 170 With persons of no sort of education, Or gentlemen, who, though well- born and bred, Grow tired of scientific conversation: I don't choose to say much upon this head, I'm a plain man, and in a single station, 175 But?Oh! ye lords of ladies intellectual, Inform us truly, have they not hen-peck'd you all?
23 Don Jose and his lady quarrell'd?why, Not any of the many could divine, Though several thousand people chose to try,
6. Calderon de la Barea and Lope de Vega, the 1811. great Spanish dramatists of the early 17th century. 8. Athenian. Attic salt is a term for the famed wit 7. Gregor von Feinagle, a German expert on the of the Athenians. art of memory, who had lectured in England in
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DO N JUAN, CANTO 1 / 67 3 180 'Twas surely no concern of theirs nor mine; I loathe that low vice curiosity, But if there's any thing in which I shine 'Tis in arranging all my friends' affairs. Not having, of my own, domestic cares. 24 is? 190 And so I interfered, and with the best Intentions, but their treatment was not kind; I think the foolish people were possess'd, For neither of them could I ever find, Although their porter afterwards confess'd? But that's no matter, and the worst's behind, For little Juan o'er me threw, down stairs, A pail of housemaid's water unawares. 1952002 5 A little curly-headed, good-for-nothing, And mischief-making monkey from his birth; His parents ne'er agreed except in doting Upon the most unquiet imp on earth; Instead of quarrelling, had they been but both in Their senses, they'd have sent young master forth To school, or had him soundly whipp'd at home, To teach him manners for the time to come. 26 Don Jose and the Donna Inez led 205For some time an unhappy sort of life, Wishing each other, not divorced, but dead; They lived respectably as man and wife, Their conduct was exceedingly well-bred, And gave no outward signs of inward strife, Until at length the smother'd fire broke out, And put the business past all kind of doubt. 2.7 210215For Inez call'd some druggists and physicians, And tried to prove her loving lord was mad,9 But as he had some lucid intermissions, She next decided he was only bad; Yet when they ask'd her for her depositions, No sort of explanation could be had, Save that her duty both to man and God Required this conduct?which seem'd very odd. 28 She kept a journal, where his faults were noted, And open'd certain trunks of books and letters, All which might, if occasion served, be quoted;
9. Lady Byron had thought her husband might be not intended to be a caricature of Lady Byron. In insane and sought medical advice on the matter. her determination to preserve her son's innocence, This and other passages obviously allude to his Donna Inez also shares traits with Byron's mother. wife, although Byron insisted that Donna Inez was
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674 / GEORGE GORDON, LORD BYRON
And then she had all Seville for abettors, Besides her good old grandmother (who doted);
The hearers of her case became repeaters, Then advocates, inquisitors, and judges, Some for amusement, others for old grudges.
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225 And then this best and meekest woman bore With such serenity her husband's woes, Just as the Spartan ladies did of yore, Who saw their spouses kill'd, and nobly chose Never to say a word about them more?
230 Calmly she heard each calumny that rose, And saw his agonies with such sublimity, That all the world exclaim'd 'What magnanimity!'
32 Their friends had tried at reconciliation, 250 Then their relations, who made matters worse; ('Twere hard to say upon a like occasion To whom it may be best to have recourse? I can't say much for friend or yet relation): The lawyers did their utmost for divorce, 255 But scarce a fee was paid on either side Before, unluckily, Don Jose died.
33 He died: and most unluckily, because, According to all hints I could collect From counsel learned in those kinds of laws, 260 (Although their talk's obscure and circumspect) His death contrived to spoil a charming cause;0 law case
A thousand pities also with respect To public feeling, which on this occasion Was manifested in a great sensation.
37. Dying intestate,0 Juan was sole heir without a will 290 To a chancery suit, and messuages,1 and lands, Which, with a long minority and care, Promised to turn out well in proper hands: Inez became sole guardian, which was fair, And answer'd but to nature's just demands; 295 An only son left with an only mother Is brought up much more wisely than another.
1. Houses and the adjoining lands. 'Chancery suit': a case in what was then the highest English court, notorious for its delays.
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DO N JUAN , CANTO 1 / 67 5 Sagest of women, even of widows, she Resolved that Juan should be quite a paragon, And worthy of the noblest pedigree: 300 (His sire was of Castile, his dam from Arragon). Then for accomplishments of chivalry, In case our lord the king should go to war again, He learn'd the arts of riding, fencing, gunnery, And how to scale a fortress?or a nunnery. 39 305 But that which Donna Inez most desired, And saw into herself each day before all The learned tutors whom for him she hired, Was, that his breeding should be strictly moral; Much into all his studies she inquired, 310 And so they were submitted first to her, all, Arts, sciences, no branch was made a mystery To Juan's eyes, excepting natural history.2 4? The languages, especially the dead, The sciences, and most of all the abstruse, 315 The arts, at least all such as could be said To be the most remote from common use, In all these he was much and deeply read; But not a page of anything that's loose, Or hints continuation of the species, 320 Was ever suffer'd, lest he should grow vicious. 41 His classic studies made a little puzzle, Because of filthy loves of gods and goddesses, Who in the earlier ages made a bustle, But never put on pantaloons or boddices; 325 His reverend tutors had at times a tussle, And for their Aeneids, Iliads, and Odysseys, Were forced to make an odd sort of apology, For Donna Inez dreaded the mythology. 42 Ovid's a rake, as half his verses show him, 330 Anacreon's morals are a still worse sample, Catullus scarcely has a decent poem, I don't
