The only thing that really worries me about my appearance now is my ears. They stick out at an angle of ninety degrees. I have checked them with my geometry set so I know it is a scientific fact.
I have had a spiritual awakening. Two nice men representing a religious group called the Sunshine People called at the house. They talked about how they alone could bring peace to the world. It is twenty pounds to join. I will get the money somehow. Nothing is too expensive where peace is concerned.
Tried to persuade Pandora to join the Sunshine People. She was not swayed by my arguments. They are calling round tomorrow to meet my parents and sign the agreement.
The Sunshine People came at six o’clock. My father made them stand on the doorstep in the rain. Their robes got wet through. My father said they were trying to brainwash a simple child. When they left my mother watched them walk up the cul-de-sac. She said, ‘They don’t look very charismatic now, they just look bloody wet’. I wept a few tears. I think I was weeping out of relief- twenty quid is a lot of money.
My father forgot to change the clocks last night so I was late for the Pink Brigade’s meeting in Pandora’s lounge. We voted to exclude Pandora’s father from the meeting on the grounds of his extreme left-wing views. We have decided to back Roy Hattersley in the expected fight for the leadership.
Pandora has gone off Tony Benn since she found out that he is a lapsed aristocrat.
Claire Neilson introduced a new member, her name is Barbara Boyer. She is dead good-looking and also dead intelligent. She disagreed with Pandora over NATO’s nuclear arms policy. Pandora had to concede that China was an unknown factor. Pandora asked Claire Neilson not to bring Barbara again.
I ate my school dinner sitting next to Barbara Boyer. She is a truly wonderful girl. She pointed out that Pandora has got a lot of faults. I was forced to agree with her.
I am committing non-sexual adultery with Barbara. I am at the centre of an eternal triangle. Nigel is the only one to know: he has been sworn to secrecy.
Nigel has blabbed it all over the school. Pandora spent the afternoon in matron’s office.
Barbara Boyer has ended our brief
I have learnt an important lesson, because of lust I am without love.
I am fifteen tomorrow.
Had a shave to cheer myself up.
I am fifteen, but legally I am still a child. There is nothing I can do today that I couldn’t do yesterday. Worse luck!
Had seven cards from relations and three from friends. My presents were the usual load of Japanese rubbish, though I did get a model aeroplane from Bert that was made in West Germany.
Pandora has ignored my birthday. I don’t blame her. I betrayed her trust.
Boz, Baz, Daz, Maz, Kev and Melv came back from the canal and gave me the bumps. Boz gave me a tube of glue for my model aeroplane.
The Casualty doctor wrote ‘Glue Sniffer’ on my outpatient’s card.
I rang Pandora; she is coming round after her viola lesson. Love is the only thing that keeps me sane…
