“Something for nothing, huh?”
“Some ‘nothing.’ Every time you use that ‘free’ stuff, you’re making a perfect record. Of yourself. Every place you go, every site you check out, everything you buy on-line. Think about it.”
I
“Christ! I’m glad I don’t have one,” I told him.
“One what?”
“Computer.”
“You don’t have a computer?”
“Nope.”
Those big liquid-topaz eyes that had charmed hookers a million years ago filled with pity. I could read his thoughts like they were printed on his forehead: “And people think
In bed that night, Gem reached for me. It was no good. I kept seeing that Indian, scratching his dog behind its ears, talking to it in a language only the two of them understood. He’d want his partner to die in battle, too. I knew that. But I didn’t have centuries of tribal tradition to comfort me. I knew Pansy wasn’t in some fucking Happy Hunting Ground.
“You are so big,” Gem whispered from between my legs.
“You are one sweet bitch.” I chuckled.
She came up on her elbows. “Are you laughing at me?”
“No, little girl. I was being … grateful to you, I guess. Some women, all they live for is to chop a man’s
“So you are saying I am lying?” she asked, crawling closer to my face.
“Not lying, honey. Let’s say … exaggerating. And it’s very—”
She interrupted me with a slap to the right side of my face. My blind side. I never saw it coming—maybe because it was the last damn thing I expected. It wasn’t a hard slap, but it got my attention. Her eyes were flaming. “I do not lie!” she whispered, harsh in the darkness. “You are not fully … engorged, are you?”
“Hell, no. Every time that window—”
“Yes! But even
“Gem …”
“But you think that will never be again, don’t you?”
I took a deep breath. Let it out. Tried to think about it. Couldn’t. “Yeah,” is all I said.
“So what?” she countered.
“Huh?”
“It would not matter.”
“But if—”
“You are a fool, Burke. Give me your hand.”
I did it, not even trying to guess this woman anymore. She guided it between her legs.
“You see?” she said. “I am … embarrassed at how wet you make me. This never happened to me before. Look,” she said softly, “even here …,” pulling my hand down. The insides of her thighs were slick with estro- juice.
“That’s just because—”
“I will not listen to any of your stupid man’s explanations. You do not understand, even when I show you the truth.”
“Gem … Look, I wasn’t …”
“Last night, after you fell asleep, I put your thumb in my mouth. I love to do that with you—I don’t know why. I thought it would help me sleep, like a child’s pacifier. But do you know what happened?”
“What?”
“I had an orgasm. So deep I can
“Great. So even if my cock flops, so long as my goddamn thumb holds out—”
I was ready for her slap this time, but I didn’t move to block it. It was a lot harder than the first. Then she jumped up, grabbed one of my sweatshirts, pulled it over her head, and walked out the door.
It was very late when she came back inside. I was half asleep, but snapped awake as soon as I heard the door. She pulled off the sweatshirt and climbed into bed next to me.
“I apologize,” she said.
“You didn’t do anything wrong.”
“I did not