Pain Management

I caught the Subaru’s chromeless flicker as it came up on my flank like a moving oil slick, then veered off into a side street. By that time, I had enough of a sense of the car to be able to pick it up on my own radar. The Subaru was a streak of light-eating matte against the sheen of the street, running through Hookerville as steady and mysterious as a midnight train.

But I never thought about trying a tail. Gordo had hooked the Caddy up with a set of toggle switches so I could alter the light configuration at the front and rear ends, but anyone who’d gone to the extent of powder- coating his car wheels black would be hip to that trick. Besides, whoever was piloting the Subaru knew the back streets real well, and had the horsepower to run away and hide, if that’s what they wanted.

I talked to a few more girls. But the only thing shaking was what they were selling.

I slept late, spent the afternoon killing time. The radio had some homophobic harpy who seemed to believe God had anointed her to rant her sleazy morality at the rest of us. I treated her show like its sponsors should have, then turned on the TV. Local news had a story about some community-spirited woman who apparently devoted her life to harassing hookers out of certain neighborhoods. Seems she built up quite a following . . . until she pepper-sprayed some teenage girl on her way to school. I bet the self-righteous babbler on the radio would have approved.

I gave the hookers the night off, tried my luck in downtown. The weather brought out the flowers. And the humans who live to pluck them. Most predators have a sweet tooth.

Plenty of kids on the street. Some of them cute as candy-stripers, some as ugly as truth. The usual mix—kids who believed they could read crop circles, and kids who snuck out at night to make them.

All trying to manage their own pain, their own way. Thinking of a rich girl from Connecticut who’d named herself Fancy. I can still see her. On a bed. On her hands and knees, facedown, marble bottom thrust high and defiant. “Kiss it or whip it,” she harsh-whispered to me. “I don’t do vanilla sex.”

And the Prof, watching with me as rubber-gloved guards carried past the body-bagged remains of a young con who’d hanged himself late the night before. “The poor dope couldn’t cope with hope,” the little man said, warning me and keeping me focused at the same time.

I always listened to the Prof. Not just because I loved him; because he knew. “You call it, you got to haul it,” he’d taught me.

That was the truth, Inside or out. If you took the label, you had to live up to it.

Different labels, different expectations. Watch enough prizefights, you’ll see plenty of heavyweights who aren’t tough at all; they’re just bullies. They lose their spine quick enough when they have to face an opponent who can really slam. But you’ll never see an intimidated bantamweight.

Something wasn’t adding up. I had an idea, but that was all. The next morning, I drove over to where Gordo and Flacco were working. When they weren’t at sea, they spent all their time in the garage, doing a frame-off on Gordo’s ’56 Packard Caribbean hardtop. Gordo had spent years working on Flacco’s 409; now it was Flacco’s turn to make his partner’s dream come true.

“?Que pasa?” I asked, ritualistically.

“De nada,” one of them replied, completing the circuit. The two men liked their games—neither one remotely resembled the name he went by.

“Going to be unreal,” I said, sighting down the rear fender of the Packard toward the trademark cathedral taillight. They both made sounds of fervent agreement.

“It was your idea, hombre,” Gordo, the mechanic half of the team, reminded me.

“It was,” I acknowledged, proudly. “Never thought you’d find one so quick, though.”

“Well, it was a total basket case,” Flacco said. “No engine or tranny; the torsion bars all busted down below—no way anyone does a numbers-match resto on this bad boy. Good damn thing, too; they wanted too much for it as it was.”

“It’ll be worth it,” I assured him. “You could cruise for years and never see another like it.”

“?Si!” Gordo confirmed. “And I got the best metal man in the business going for me, too.”

“This job’s going to be a stone motherfucker,” Flacco said, bobbing his head slightly at his partner’s praise. “But we get it perfect, amigo, this you can take to the bank.”

“You’re going to need major cubes to move this monster,” I said to Gordo.

“It came with major cubes, man. More than six liters’ worth. Twin fours, duals, high compression . . . I’ll bet it could move, back in the day. But there’s no way we’d ever find a drop-in lying around. I been studying on it, and I figure, the way to go, we get us a custom-rebuilt Hemi. Plenty room under there for the Elephant; and that way, we got something real special, you with me?”

“Perfect!” I agreed, offering him a palm to slap. “There’s no replacement for displacement.”

I hung around for another hour or so, listening to Flacco. How he was not only going to make the hood scoops functional, he was also planning to flare the fenders so the nineteen-inch wheel-and-tire combo would look as if it were factory stock. And then Gordo explained how he was going with a full air-bag suspension, so the monster could get into the weeds for show but be driven on the street without a problem.

Just before I left, I asked them if they had a convertible I could borrow for the night.

“Sure,” Flacco said. “You got clean paper, amigo? La Migra is a motherfucker.”

It was their joke that I was running the same risk with INS they were, only paper standing between me and deportation.

“I’ll just speak Spanish,” I told them.

That cracked Gordo up. “That plan, it is muy estupido, hombre. They hear your Spanish, they know you ain’t from down south.”

“Not like your English,” I complimented them.

“Ah, I got a better plan,” Flacco said, bitterly. “I ever get dropped, I tell them I’m a fucking cubano, okay? Instead of shipping me back across the river, they buy me a house in Miami. ?Verdad?”

“Right,” I agreed. America doesn’t care much about why you came here, just where you came from. We take Marielitos with open arms because they’re “fleeing repression.” But when people try to cross the Rio Grande to get away from death squads and drug armies and bone-crumbling poverty, we ship them off like a NAFTA export.

The real reason Congress excludes Mexicans is that it doesn’t want California turning into another Florida. You give wetbacks a chance at political power, the ungrateful bastards will actually use it.

“Hell, friend, no offense, okay?” Smilin’ Jack told me the next day. “But I’m trying to run a comics business here, not a message drop.”

“Sure, I understand. But, like you said, you’re a businessman, right?”

“Right . . .” he said, guardedly.

“And a business like this, one thing you always do, you take extra-good care of your best customers, right? I mean, let’s say they wanted to meet one of the artists who draw these comics, and you knew the artist was going to be in your store, well, you’d be sure and let the customer know, right?”

He nodded like he was going along. But then he blew me off with, “One, Madison isn’t going to be dropping in to do a signing anytime soon that I know of. Two, you’re not exactly what I would describe as a good customer.”

“What’s a good customer?” I asked him. The store was empty, but I needed more than just his casual attention. I had to keep him engaged until he saw the light.

“A good customer is, first of all, a regular,” he said, as if he could conjure one up by describing the prototype. “We keep a hold for all our regulars.”

“What’s a hold?”

“Well, it’s, like, the customer tells us what comics he wants. And every month, or whenever their favorites are published, we pull what they want from our shipment and we hold it for them until they come in.”

“What’s the big deal about that?”