Calamity

forgetting the First Commandment: Thou shall have no other gods before me.”

“You ever think that maybe there are tons of gods but they’re all part of one bigger god? Like all the gumballs in a gumball machine are individual gods but the machine is a single god made up of the others.” He was paraphrasing the book and it sounded beyond adult; it was brilliant. He wished someone had recorded it because he was already forgetting what he said.

“You’re a bright boy. That is quite an interesting idea and I must admit I’ve never thought about it that way before. But God is not one gumball or many in a machine; He is the all-powerful, the empowered. He can make magic. Do you believe in magic?”

“You mean like changing water to wine?” He had seen that in one of those religious cartoons sometimes played on PBS.

“I mean like awakening the soul. You know how depressed you feel right now, how hurt, like the pain is buried inside your heart? God can release that pain. He can free it from you. I know because He freed me from my pain.”

“My sister died. People die. That’s what happens.” Something hurt inside him as he said those words.

“Do you know the story of Jesus and Lazarus? In it, Jesus brings back to life a man who has been dead for several days. Jesus simply says, ‘Lazarus, Come Forth’ and the man does.”

What was the point of wasting so much time on Brendan when Dad was right inside? What did this guy want? Brendan knew how to get rid of him, or at least annoy him. “Then why can’t Jesus bring my sister back to life?”

“He can.”

That made Brendan pause.

“How?”

“If you believe in Him, even after you die, you will live forever.”

“In the clouds? Floating around and whatever?”

The smile wavered again, but just for a second, and his right eye blinked. Was that a signal or a twitch?

“Did your sister believe?”

“In cloud-floating?”

The man took his hand from Brendan’s shoulder, finally, and gripped his Bible with both hands. The hand still felt like it was there on his shoulder, pressing down with invisible weight.

“Do you know the story of Abraham and his son Isaac? God told Abraham to sacrifice Isaac, Abraham’s only son, to Him as a sign of complete devotion. Abraham and Isaac went to the place God had commanded and gathered sticks to create a fire. While doing this, Isaac asked his father where the lamb was that God wanted scarified. Abraham told him that God would provide a lamb. Can you imagine the terror Isaac must have felt when Abraham tied him up and laid him upon the pile of sticks? Of course, when Abraham raised the knife over his son, an angel appeared and told him to stop, that God was pleased by his sign of devotion.

“Or the story of Job? Job was a devout believer and one day Satan told God that Job was only a believer because his life was so good. God gave the devil permission to ruin Job’s life. Job’s sons are killed, his farmland destroyed, his cattle slaughtered. His body is infected with oozing boils and excruciating illnesses. And through all this pain, Job contends that we can not accept the good things from God and refuse the bad. He refuses to turn his back on God and in return God ultimately empowers him with an even more blessed life than he had known. People say this story shows why we must be obedient to God, do what he says. But that’s not the real reason. Think about these two stories. What do you think the point is?”

Brendan had forgotten how creepy this guy seemed or how his large hand had felt like it was crushing his shoulder. The story of Abraham and Isaac grabbed him and he imagined how scared the kid must have been when his father tied him up and prepared to kill him. He imagined what Job must have felt when everything he valued died and his body became a breeding ground for all sorts of horrible diseases. Brendan hated having a cold, never mind boils spewing puss all over his body. Yet, in those stories, Brendan also found a common link, like a jigsaw puzzle piece that fit in two puzzles.

“God can do whatever He wants,” Brendan said.

The man’s gray eyes softened. “You are a perceptive boy. And very special, no doubt.” The eyes hardened again, like a coating hiding something on the inside. “God can do whatever He wants, and His will is often unfair.”

Capricious, Brendan thought.

“He may demand a sacrifice and then rescind it or He may take and take whatever He wants before ever giving something back. He may never give anything back. He can be cruel, unjust. He took your sister. That was cruel, perhaps unfair. But perhaps she was a sacrifice God demanded. Do you think it’s possible that God has a plan so complex that we can never possibly understand it?”

The bowling ball slipping from his hands, the shattering windshield, the car smashing the tree, the bumper stickers on the back: EDITORS DO IT FOR MONEY.

“God takes,” the man continued, “but He does give. You just have to ready your heart to receive. There is much more to tell you about His power and the great works of Jesus Christ the Empowered, of course. But there is no point unless you think there is a possibility that your sister did not die in vain, that there was a reason for her death, for her sacrifice. Do you believe in that possibility?”

He didn’t need a moment to answer: “Absolutely.”

The man stood, draped an arm over Brendan’s shoulders.

A few minutes later, the man was on the floor near Delaney’s coffin, blood slicking across his face as Brendan’s father punched him again and again until two people dragged him off.

4

They were in Paul’s car, speeding away from the funeral home when Paul finally told him what had been going on at school all week.

“She’s one psycho bitch.”

“What happened?”

“I thought you were nuts, saying that shit about her mother, the blood and whatever, but you must be telling the truth.”

Was Sasha walking around school in all black waving a bottle of blood and shouting how her mother had cursed Tyler Williams for raping her in his car Friday night? Maybe she posted the newspaper article about Delaney’s death on the bulletin board next to the announcements about track practice and the PTO Bake Off and scribbled on it that her death was only the beginning. More blood would spill until Tyler admitted what he did and begged forgiveness. Then she’d sever his penis and store it in a jar in her basement where she and her mother worshipped their evil gods.

“What is it? What is she doing?”

Paul laughed, turned to him. “She says you two are in love.”

“What?” He actually meant to say, What are you fucking joking because you better be, but the shock limited Tyler to one-syllable exclamation.

“Yeah, man. She’s been walking around all week saying you and her are true love and shit. She’s got a heart up in her locker with your picture on it from last year’s yearbook. At least that’s what the girls been saying. She’s whacked out. She walks around with a stupid smile on her face and, ha ha, she’s already talking about prom. You guys are getting a stretch limo, I hear.”

“Bullshit. This is a joke, right? Trying to lighten my mood?”

“I wish I was. She’s nuts. She told Patti Holt that you practically proposed to her on Friday and she just couldn’t resist how sweet you were.”

“Did she say we … you know.”

“Fucked? Not exactly, but people are putting things together. You’re not there to defend yourself, so the rumor mill churns and churns. By next week, everyone will think you two got married in Vegas or something.”

“What is up with her?” He was staring out the window, vaguely aware that Paul was driving toward Sky View Estates. “You taking me home?”

“Your father got beers?”

“Maybe. Why?”