A Dark, Distorted Mirror. Volume 5 : Among the Stars, like Giants. Part 1 : Learning How to Live

and delegation. This was something Delenn had been taught very early, but unfortunately it required enough people that a leader trusted in order to delegate to.

That was a list that was in woefully short supply.

And the most important position of all. That still had to be decided.

'Babylon Five needs a Commanding Officer,' she said. It was true. The station was receiving an increasing amount of traffic in recent weeks. People were flocking here, not just diplomats and their staff, but traders, questors, anyone seeking a new home. There were even many who had come here to see her, a fact Delenn contemplated with no pleasure. G'Kar was working on establishing a Ranger base here, although he still insisted on maintaining the main base on Kazomi 7.

And as Alliance business grew, so did the number of people required to attend to it all. Nearly everyone from Kazomi 7 had moved here. Of all of the people she knew and trusted on Kazomi 7, only Vejar had never set foot here.

A succession of people had performed acting CO duties for the station during its construction. Major Krantz, Captain Tikopai, Captain Kulomani, Commander Ta'Lon, John himself, but no one permanent had been appointed yet. John was currently Acting Commanding Officer, but there was too much work for him, coupled with leading the Dark Star fleet.

'I know,' he said, not looking up from the report he was reading. 'I was hoping.... David could....'

'I know,' she said. He had been hoping that for a while, back when he had first broached the idea to her. But David was not here, and neither of them knew where he was. It was more than a year since he had left, giving no explanation other than that he needed 'some space'. 'But we do not know if he is ever coming back.'

'He will be.'

'But until he does....' Delenn was not sure if he would, but she did not try to puncture John's illusions. She had watched David's gradual slide into despair, seen all the wounds of body and mind he had suffered. Some such wounds never healed, and she doubted there was anywhere he could go where he could be truly made well.

'We'll appoint someone else until he does,' John agreed. 'Have you read this?'

'Probably.' Delenn sighed. She doubted there was a single piece of paper anywhere on the station she had not read. 'What is it?'

'Ranger reports. Some of the Dark Stars have been looking into these rumours we've been hearing all year. You know, the ones about those ships. Unidentifiable ships.'

'I think I remember,' she murmured. 'What about it?'

'They haven't found anything. One of them hasn't come back, but there are still sightings. A Brakiri merchant ship almost ran into something in hyperspace just a couple of weeks ago. The description is.... like nothing I've ever seen before.'

'There have always been stories, rumours.'

'And if these are more? Dammit, what if it's the Shadows hiding out somewhere? Letting us think they've all gone, biding their time.'

'We could send out another ship to investigate.'

'No. They won't find anything. There's an old saying. 'If you want something done right, you have to do it yourself.' Besides, I've been getting cabin fever. It'll be good to get back out into space again.'

Delenn looked up, brushing a lock of hair from her eyes. 'You will go yourself?'

'This could be important. It shouldn't have been left this long.'

'We have been busy. The Drazi. These raiders. Securing trade routes....'

'There is nothing more important than making sure the Shadows don't come back, Delenn. Nothing. If this is them.... we have to know about it.'

'I know that,' she snapped. 'But does this really need you? You are the General of the Alliance. What if...?'

She stopped. He was smiling, in that graceless, almost boyish way he had sometimes, rarely. 'Is that just a Minbari way of saying you are going to miss me?'

She frowned, but could not help turning it into a smile. 'I will miss you,' she said softly. 'When will you be going?' There was no point in trying in dissuade him, no point at all.

'The sooner the better. My crew is always ready, so we can leave tomorrow. We shouldn't be out that long. Perhaps.... a month or two.'

'Tomorrow?'

'Early tomorrow.' He looked at her, his head cocked slightly. 'Are you doing anything important?'

'Well....'

'Anything that can't wait until tomorrow?'

'No,' she said smiling. 'Nothing that can't wait until tomorrow.'

He moved forward quickly and took her hand, helping her to her feet. His lips met hers.

'Carpe diem,' he whispered to her.

'I couldn't agree more,' she whispered back.

* * *

Whispers from the Day of the Dead — IV

He had died in peace, his eyes open unblinking to the light of the sun, the same eyes that now look at her with such wonder, with such love. His wounds are gone, the limp, the shattered spine, the mangled hand, the injuries he had sustained defending her and had struggled with all the remainder of his life, they are now gone. His soul is as perfect as she remembered.

'It is you, then,' she whispers. 'I had hoped. I had dared to dream that.... Why did you never tell me?'

'What could I tell you, my lady? I think I knew, but only a little. I had only the slightest idea. Whatever Sinoval did to me when he brought me back.... it could not keep me alive forever. Not even for long.

'But what time I had, I spent with you.'

'You died alone.'

'No, my lady. You were with me. You were always with me. Even when we were apart, even when.... You were always with me.'

'I love you.'

'And I have always loved you. You know that.'

She nods. 'I know that.'

He walks forward, a slow smile playing across his face. With a hand once mangled and ruined he lifts up her chin, and a flicker of lightning passes through her at his touch. She looks up into his eyes, and is lost in them. Gone is the Satai, the leader, the orator, the woman who has weathered torture and loss and heartbreak. All that remains is the woman in love.

'You wear my necklace,' he says, touching it gently. 'I never finished it. I wish I had.'

'I will always wear it.'

He kisses her gently, and holds her against him. She cries into his shoulder.

'Why have you not gone beyond?' she asks him, after a while. 'Why...?'

'The warrior I used to be would tell you I remained behind to guide those who would come after me, that I had delusions of becoming a spirit like all those great ones who fell. The worker I became would simply say that I waited for you.

'I will wait for you, and then.... we will pass beyond together, to be reborn into new lives, to experience new loves, to live the long life of happiness we were denied in this existence.'

'Do you truly believe that?'

'I do.'

'It is just.... so hard.... sometimes. I wake up in the middle of the night and reach for you beside me. I sometimes imagine you walking beside me. I go to ask your opinion and I realise you are not there. I need you.'

'I have faith in you, my lady. I always did. I know just how strong you truly are. Our people are lucky to have you. They need you more than they realise.'